I Will Guide You Through the Night (part 1)
by Pirate OwO
Summary: An ancient elven woman, a would be slave, with a secret joins up with the Inquisition. Her past is hidden behind her mismatched eyes. She is not what she appears to be. Even the great Fen Harel couldn't have guessed. Not even herself. Secrets will come out. "I see your monsters. I see your pain. tell me your problems, I'll chase them away." Monsters by Timeflies.
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's note :**_

 _ **Hi :) This is my first story I've written in many years. I just recently got inspired to write one when I was submitting an OC character idea that I randomly came up with, Ghilan/Nyx, for a story I've been reading in this site. It was for 'Healer' by Sarcasmandcynicism. At first I just had a simple charcter idea with a small background story. But then I started getting more ideas to include in that one thought. It kept bugging me so much that I just started to write them out. Then I thought maybe I can make this into a story. So I wrote it all out. By hand. Yep.**_

 _ **Anyway, so this whole idea has been floating in my head now and this is me doing something with it.**_

 _ **This will probably be a two part thing. So this is the first chapter of part 1.**_

 _ **And anything Bioware belongs to them. Except the OC''s, they're mine. :P**_

 _ **And you may notice that I used some names from other sources. Just the names though, not the actual character.**_

 _ **It may suck ... just a warning ...**_

 _ **(Elven**_ _ **in Italics)**_

 **CH 1: Deep End ...**

 **- _Deep End by Birdy_**

" _What are we going to do?"San hissed_ at her husband. " _What are we going to do?! In a few years time Ghilan will have to undergo the process of obtaining these!_ _"_ She pointed harshly at her face indicating the intricate slave markings. Clearly on the verge of being hysterical.

" _Let me think woman_! _"_ Her husband Liev urged.

San began her pacing in the main room of their small hovel again. Both parents are owned by the huntress Andruil, and when they bore Ghilan they were expected, like all others, to have their children undergo the process of obtaining the markings of the noble they served when those children became of age.

" _We can't let her have her Liev! Please, we must think of something!_ _"_

" _I know_ _!"_

San fisted at her hair, trying to contain her panic. " _You barley managed to get out of her sick games because she was called into counci_ l", defiance coated her words, _"_ _I will not risk that of our daughter."_

" _I wouldn't either, San. I would never let that happen_ _."_

" _Then what will we do? Three more years! Three more is all she has left Liev. We can't ... we can't_ _."_

San stopped her pacing and whispered those last words as she stood at the door leading to Ghilan's sleeping form.

A thousand thoughts raced through Liev's mind as his wife weeps for a child they fear that they cannot save.

The screams and howls are what had awoke Ghilan. She quickly dawned her shawl and went straight out of her room, opening her door to find that her parents were rushing out as well. No doubt the wails were what awoken them too. A questioning look to her parents and she saw the same confusion that she felt. Ghilan reached their door leading to the outside first and she opened it to the rising sound of wails and sobs, followed by broken words.

" _She's killed my boy_ _!"_

As soon as the words were out of the woman's mouth San and Liev froze. Ghilan opened the door wider, revealing a gruesome site. Her eyes widened, face paling. Shaking himself from his mind, Liev noticed his daughter's face. Taken over by panic he wretched Ghilan away and slammed the door shut.

Ghilan just stood there motionless. Eyes still fixed on the door as if she could see through it. She ... had heard about these events, but has never seen anything related. And now with the image forever burned into her mind, she will never forget. The woman she had seen is a neighbour of theirs. She was knelt in the dirt, sobbing with her head turned up to the heavens, a boy, a few years older than Ghilan, in her arms unmoving. Blood had dried around his mouth and puncture wounds. The wounds were deep, various in sizes. Some like holes left by arrows, other lacerations by near misses. Andruil and her sick games. Ghilan's eyes hardened and fists clenched. Andruil, the so called 'Goddess of the Hunt'. The one who was gifted with being the most talented hunter. People were in reverence over he skills. Prayed to her, asked to be blessed that their hunts would be fruitful. She loved her games though. She'd hunt various animals for various reasons. Sometimes she'd just hunt for the fun of it. She'd hunt; bears, goats, rabbits, wolves, and ... other elven. She used her own servants as her game. Her hunt. Her prey.

Later, when San and Liev had gone to comfort the women they were told what had happened. The woman awoke that morning to do her usual tasks for the day when Andruil and requested her to clear the hunt area for another game. She went out, throwing the carcasses into a crate. This would be what they would use for meals for Andruil. The woman had finally came across the corpses of the other elves. This wasn't a surprise to her, however what was though was that she had stumbled upon the corpse of her beloved son. Her blood gone cold and her skin white. She dropped to the ground as did her heart. She lost all sense, all caring for anything else but what lay at her knees. She saw that the blood had darkened and crusted. He – he had been dead a while, most likely died overnight. He worked through the nights, so she didn't suspect ... this. She plucked out the arrows from his body and carried it back towards their living grounds. The other slaves around her paid her no mind. They numbly continued her work for her. They had all seen it happen before. Some of them had gone through that pain.

After San and Liev had come back from comforting the grieving woman they stood, back in their hovel. San's eyes downcast, hopeless. Liev's on his daughter, hands clenched into fists. And Ghilan who stood still with shock.

It wasn't until the knock on the door that time had seemed to resume. Liev made the fist move and opened it up to find his good friend, Niel, who stood at the door way bearing supplies.

" _Another one_ _?"_ Niel asked.

Liev merely nodded.

" _I'm sorry_ _."_ Niel glanced at San and Ghilan gathering the items off his cart that they had purchased from him.

" _I am too_ _."_ Liev replied while taking out money to pay his friend.

" _Hey, I'm going to be heading south soon after. Did you need me to pick up something for you and your family while I'm there? I'll give you a discount, since we're good friends. What about the salve your wife likes? The one for her feet. I could also .._."

In all honesty Liev's mind had wondered after hearing his friend mentioning about traveling south. He came to realize that Niel is constantly traveling, never in one place for too long. He had it. It was insane and there would be terrifying consequences if – no – when they were found out. But for Ghilan, their daughter, anything.

" _What do you say friend? You look like ..."_

" _Niel_ _!"_

" _I – umm – yes, Liev_? _"_ Niel stuttered, surprised by Liev's sudden outburst.

" _I've got a proposition for you. Walk with me a bit would you, my friend."_

They stepped out of their little yard of their hovel and started walking at a leisure pace. Keeping voices low enough.

" _Take Ghilan with you Neil._ _"_ Was all Liev said.

Neil had come to an abrupt halt, stunned beyond measure. " _What_ _!?_ "

Liev gestured with his hands for Neil to keep his voice down. " _Take Ghilan with you, my friend. Take her away from here, from Arlathan, and away from Andruil and these so called pompous Gods. Please, my friend. She is able to work, she can help you. Please, San and I cannot bear to loose her, especially to Andruil._ _"_ Liev was heartbeats away from getting in his knees. He felt as if Neil was their daughter's only shot at escaping.

Neil was still utterly stunned. He looked into his friend's eyes and saw something that pained him to see. Here was this man, tougher than any other man Neil knew, with no other hope for his daughter's escape but the one Liev was begging Neil to grant. He would give up the chance to see his daughter of 13 years of age reach her adult hood. Her father and mother would give up the chance to witness their daughter grow into a beautiful women. And in return they are sacrificing themselves. They are beyond desperate.

" _Alright_ _."_ Neil spoke softly. " _But we must do this at night fall, preferably. We wouldn't want to cause suspicion_ _."_

Liev's eyes shone with relief and tears trying to force their way out.

" _Thank you, my friend_! _"_

Neil shook his head and added solemnly, _"_ _I hope you got a mighty fine plan my friend."_

" _Come then. Let us go back to my place. We shall speak more there, over dinner."_

It was slightly after dusk. The sun was beginning to set and Ghilan had gone to wash their linens in the wash basin located at the back of their hovel.

San, Liev, and Neil had gathered around the dining table, hatching their plan.

" _San and I will have a burial. The women from earlier today just buried her sons body. The plan is for the two of us to sneak in the burial grounds and dig up the boy's body. San will pour oil over it and set it aflame with fire so hot that it would burn the body beyond recognition. Then we will bury it and we will say that Ghilan had perished due to a horrific accident. Andruil will hear of it indirectly somehow. When she summons for Ghilan to receive the marks we will offer up the same lie_ _."_

" _Wait! You think that Andruil will actually believe that_ _?_ " Neil asked with concern _._

" _No we don't_ _."_ San spoke up, " _Our belief is that you and Ghilan will be far from here, out of her reach, out of all their reaches by then_ _."_

Neil shook his head, not really believing what he was hearing. They would ... He spoke gravely, _"_ _You know you two will die for this._ _"_

" _We will die for our daughter, yes_ _."_ San looked into Neil's eyes with rebellious acceptance, reaching for Liev's hand and clutching it within hers.

" _All right then. As you wish my friends. Let us do this now then._ _"_

Ghilan had finished the wash and was on her way back inside. She came upon the site of seeing her parents and Neil awaiting her by Neil's carriage.

" _What's going on_ _?"_

" _You are going to go with Neil now, child. You will go and help him with his work._ _"_

Ghilan worried her hands at the basket she carried. " _Mammae, I don't understand._ _"_

" _Ghilan, my child. You know of how Andruil is. Of what that woman you saw earlier today went though due to her son. Please, Ghilan. Do this for us_ _."_

Ghilan realized as to what they were doing. They were sending her away. She slammed the basket down on the ground at her feet as her anger flared. Not at her parents, specifically. No. Her anger was more directed towards Andruil.

" _No. I will not leave you here alone. I want to stay! I'll be strong, I can help, I can ..._ _"_

" _Ghilan_ _..."_ San started, rubbing her eyes with her palms.

" _No_!" Ghilan rose her voice.

" _GHILAN_!" Liev bellowed. His voice become softer as he spoke now that Ghilan had stopped arguing. " _Ghilan, my joy. I am honoured, grateful you had emerged. You are a blessing. I am sorry Ghilan that we must part, especially like this. My Ghilan, I am so, so sorry. I ask that you will understand why we are doing this and that you will not be angry with us. We love you Ghilan, never doubt that. You will be safe my child. Now"_ _,_ everyone had tears streaming down their faces, Liev wrapped an around San and gestured with the other to the carriage _, "_ _We give you your freedom._ _"_

Ghilan broke down and ran to her parent's embrace. Sobbing in their arms.

" _Mammae, Pappae. I will go. I am so – sorry. I love y-you and I am sorry. I love you Mammae, Pappae. I will never forget you and what you've done for me. I love you_ _."_

They stayed like that for some time until Neil spoke up. _"_ _I'm sorry, but we – ahem- we should get going before the sunrise._ _"_ His voice was hoarse with emotion.

And with that Ghilan trudged toward the carriage and turned back to look at her parents with defeated eyes as they drove away.

News of Ghilan's death had already started to spread shortly mid day the next.

On the way out of Arlathan Neil had to go through the territory of Fen Harel. The Dread Wolf.

" _Just stay low and quiet, Ghilan. We will be through shortly_. _"_

She nodded her, not that Niel could have seen either way.

Unfortunately, luck wasn't on their side this morning, because who should emerge to stop them. None other than The Dread Wolf himself. " _Hello. Might I inquire as to why you have stepped foot onto my lands_ _?"_

" _I am a merchant, my lord. I was just passing through_ _."_

Fen Harel dismissed the use of 'my lord' at the wave of his hand.

" _A merchant you say? May I have a look at your wares, my friend?_ _"_ Fen Harel inquired.

" _Oh- um ce-certainly my -oh umm, Sir._ _"_

As Fen Harel's roamed the carriage he made his way picking up baubles and potions to inspect then set back down. He came to a stop in front of the window in which Ghilan sat beside.

At this Neil could do nothing but feel nervous and Ghilan, as well, felt the same. They did not want to draw suspicion. They especially did not want to draw out the anger of the feared Dread Wolf.

" _Would you be as so kind as to pull back the curtains, my Lady."_ He spoke in a cool, calm manner.

Ghilan sat there, petrified. But she could hardly refuse. He could use force to get what he wanted and that would cause a scene. A scene in which they didn't want. So ever so slowly she drew them back. She had only caught glimpses of him from a far, never up close. But up close, he was breathtakingly handsome. The sharpness of his jaw line, his angular features, his hair, his slightly coy smile, and – his eyes. Her mismatched icy blue and grey met his steel blue ones and she got lost in them for a split second. She caught herself and blushed.

" _He-hello, Sir._ _"_ She mumbled.

" _What is your name young lady_ _?"_

" _G-Ghilan, Sir_ _."_ She responded, eyes turned down.

Fen Harel mused., " _Aren't you one of Andruil's 'to-be's?_ _"_

At this she paled, fumbled for words. However, Fen Harel continued on.

" _I had actually heard a rumour mentioning your death, Ghilan._ _"_

The way her name sounded from him she would've melted if she didn't feel her blood run cold.

" _Sir, please. Let us pass._ _"_ Neil stepped in.

" _And why should I do that? The proper thing to do would be to notify Andruil herself that she has a runaway_ _."_

"Because, my Lord, _"_ At the use of the phrase Fen Harel quirked an eyebrow, " _Please, her parents implored me to get their daughter away from here so she can be safe from Andruil. Please, surely you must know how her cruelty is wielded._ _"_

Fen Harel seemed to consider and then spoke, _"_ _Lucky for you, I am not particularly found of the idea of slavery, let alone that if Andruil._ " He studied them and gestured to his lands where the elves roamed about. " _As you can see the elves here bear no marks for I claim no ownership of them. That being said, may I offer that Ghilan would stay here? I will guarantee her safety and I can keep Andruil from claiming her._ _"_

Shocked by his seriousness of his offer, Niel found it difficult to respond. Ghilan, therefore did it for him.

" _Thank you for your generous offer, Fen Harel. However, my parents risked their own to make sure I get away from Andruil. And I will not let their risk go to waste just to move a few ways down the road. I am grateful for your considerate offer, but I must decline_."

Neil paled, jaw dropped at her refusal of an offer from Fen Harel.

Ghilan held Fen Harel's gaze. They stared each other down until he slowly started to grin. A corner of his mouth turned upwards.

" _Very well, Ghilan. As you wish_. _"_ He chuckled lightly. " _Should you change your mind, you are welcome to come back here, young one_ _."_

And with a final nod of thanks Ghilan and Niel took off. Grateful to be closer to the outskirts of Arlathan.

" _Hmm. Ghilan. Interesting."_ Fen Harel mused to himself watching them depart.

" _Wow. I would have never expected Fen Harel to be so ... civil_. _"_ Niel stated, bewilderment coloured his face.

" _Yeah_ _..."_ Was Ghilan's only reply. Lost in her thoughts.


	2. Chapter 2

**Ch 2: Before I went Away ...**

 _ **\- Before I went Away by Wrings**_

 _7 years later..._

"So, what about we make camp here, _little one_?"

"I'm not a child anymore, _Old man_. You can stop calling me that." Ghilan stated teasingly. And quite frankly, she was 20 years now. She kinda had a point.

"As long as you are someone's child, Ghilan, you will always be thought of as such." Neil replied.

They had stopped just a few ways away out of a small village they had traded to and were currently on the outskirts of a lush forest.

"Hey, Ghilan, how about a quick spar before we eat?"

"Sure. But don't think I'll go easy on you, _Old man_." She said cocksure as she got herself ready, taking out the makeshift daggers (sticks) they used for practice.

"Don't get cocky now, _Little one_."

And so they begun. They had started off face to face, daggers ready, circling, waiting to see who would make the first move. Ghilan stepped out first, having on dagger held across her face horizontal and the other subtly at her side. She made a move as if to strike his neck, but Neil had blocked it. As soon as he did she swiftly brought out her other dagger from her side and made for a quick jab to the side of his body.

They carried on like this until it was late afternoon, both being equally matched despite age. Neil had seen to that.

Neil had been an accomplished bodyguard at one point in his early life to one of the lesser nobles. He was extremely skilled in the profession of assassins, as well as a master duellist. Upon an injury that had him make a career change, he became a traveling merchant. Neil had began to train Ghilan in order for her to defend herself. He started her a couple weeks after they had left Arlathan after they had encountered a couple of bandits. Along with the training, Neil was also teaching her the Common tongue due to their occupation.

"Alright, Ghilan. I - I think that's enough." Neil was hunched over, hands on his knees, out of breath.

"Aww, come on. You're not that old Neil. Let's go another round!" Ghilan said enthusiastically, though she was flopped down, face in the ground. Just as out of breath as he was.

"Thank you for the compliment, little one, however we do need to eat." Neil chided, already making his way over to get supplies to cook over the fire he was about to start.

Ghilan quickly rose up, blood rushing to her head making her a bit light headed.

"Wait, let me cook. You just relax. Take a nap."

"Oh, come now I'm not so old I need naps." Neil replied thinking she was teasing again but he saw the sincerity in her eyes and he relented. "Oh, alright. But if you need a hand, Ghilan, you let me know."

"Its fine, Neil. I'll call you when it is ready." She beamed victoriously.

" _As you wish."_ Neil walked away.

"Hey, Neil?"

"Yes?"

" _I – th - thank you, Neil. For everything._ "

She had thanked him everyday since leaving Arlathan. He smiled at that, a small thing that was filled with happiness as well as empathy. For he knew she meant 'everything'.

" _You are welcome, Ghilan._ "

They ate at dusk, just mere moments before the sun was about to start setting. They had talked while they ate. Neil was telling Ghilan stories of how he had met her father and how Liev had saved his life.

Neil had gone back, once, to Arlathan since they left. It was when Ghilan was 18. He went alone into the city, wanting to check in with her parents. However, he was told that her parents had passed on. For Andruil had found out that Ghilan's death was faked, but by then Ghilan and Neil had been gone for a year. When Andruil had found out she had ordered a public display of the execution of both San and Liev.

Ghilan was not herself during those passing months. See, she is mainly a sweet, caring, funny, carefree, gentle, loving, full of curiosity kind of girl.

But during that period she was cold. She was so uncaring. She was depressed and hateful. It was like the very ground froze at her feet. It was a whole different side of Ghilan that pained Neil to see.

After they had finished dinner they washed up and Neil was headed off to sleep. It was still a couple of hours before night fall and Ghilan wanted to explore the forest. Neil gave into her curiosity and told her to come back before dark.

As she explored, she came across an old ruin of some sort. She looked up to the sky and noticed a few stars popping out of the still blue, orange sky.

" _I still have sometime_." She whispered to herself in Elven and she entered the ruin.

Upon closer inspection it appeared to be an old abandoned temple. To who it was dedicated to, she had no idea. The markings seemed familiar, but it was not markings of the Pantheon. It was none that she could recall. She walked around inside for about a good 20 minutes until she started to feel as if a headache was coming on. Her eyes hurt from the strain she was putting on them trying to see in the darkening temple. She decided to lay her head down on a relatively clean surface.

" _Just until it stops hurting_." She mumbled to herself in pain.

Meanwhile, the sky was cloaked in the darkness of the night.

When Ghilan awoke she was unbelievably stiff. Her first thought was that it must be dark now and Neil was going to be extremely cross with her.

" _Mammae, Pappae. Help me. Neil is going to be so pi—_ "

Her words halted as she made to stand but found she couldn't. She could not even rise. She had awoken to find herself shackled.

" _Wh – What is this?!_ " Ghilan exclaimed.

"Ah. It appears you are awake." A woman appeared from the shadows.

"I had found you laying unconscious in a forest during my exploration. You were clearly malnourished. Lucky for you that I had come along when I did. I've been having my slaves look after you until you would awaken."

Noticing the woman was speaking Common, with a strange accent mind you, Ghilan responded, "Where am I?" She was feeling extremely overwhelmed and confused.

"In my home. In Minrathous."

Still confused, she had no idea where that was, she just asked the next question that came to her mind, "How long was I unconscious?"

"About two days ago we found you. Though I've no idea how long you were there before we came along. You were practically skin and bones." The woman thought for a moment. "It was like what some of the elves would describe as Uthenera. From the time of Arlathan. Passed out as you were." The women stated with mild interest.

"In the time of Arlathan? Why do you talk as if it is no more?"

The woman scoffed, "Because it is girl. Maybe you bumped your head as well."

Ghilan was about to speak again but the woman had held up her hand.

"I'll tell you what though. Since I practically saved your life, the way I see it is you owe me. I found you and brought you into my home and nursed you back to well enough health that you are able to tatter on as you do. So I'll cut to the chase. Since I saved your life, it is only fitting that I own it now

"What!" Ghilan shouted. " _No!"_

"I've saved your life, dear girl! You owe me and now I own you. I will not let a perfectly good elf go to waste. You will work as one of my slaves."

" _I will see your blood on my blades first."_ Ghilan threatened, reverting back to Elven.

Clearly not understanding and unfazed either way the woman simply said, "I will call on you in the morning to further the arrangement."

With that the woman left Ghilan chained up in the cage she now saw she was in. Her gaze followed the woman as she went up the stairs. A small Elven boy, teenager, followed after her.

Ghilan let out a string of Elven curses. " _What happened!_ "

Everything was overwhelming her. She had gone unknowingly into Uthenera for who knows how long. How did she do that? She hadn't shown any signs of her magic manifesting yet, well at least before. And now she's being held captive and forced into slavery!

And Neil. Her heart broke at the thought of him. What did her think when she never came back. When he couldn't find her. She should have never wondered off. She dug harshly at herself, sobbing as each thought stung her.

Ghilan was so overcome with exhaustion and weakness, sleep had claimed her far too swiftly.


	3. Chapter 3

**CH 3: Trust ..**

 _ **\- Trust by Christina Perri**_

When Ghilan was awoken by one of the slaves, they told her she was to wash and change into the provided clothes and then follow them upstairs to the main room.

"Introductions will be announced as well as the list of duties you will be expected to perform." One of the others slaves had said to her. None of them really said much to her.

In truth, Ghilan was grateful at least for the allowance of a bath and a change of attire. Apparently a few millennia does strain the nostrils.

Ghilan did what was instructed of her, she was too weak to do otherwise. She was led into the main room as she was told and came to the sight of many other slaves, with the woman seated on the lush couch and another slave, a young man, who stood near her. Like the woman had said, introductions were to be made.

The woman had introduced herself as Magister Elise. She prided herself apparently on not being like most other slave owners. She announced that she would never kill a slave, getting that right out in the open. She would never kill, unless the cause was rightly justified. And she did not mean justified as how other slave owners may think. She continued on saying that she will also never punish a slave so severely that it would cause in the inhibition to do their work. She deemed such acts to be wastes. She told Ghilan that she was to address her as either; Miss or Ma'am.

"So there you have it. You will be working with Arno," she had snapped her fingers and the man – an elf, not too much older in appearance than herself, beside her straightened and stepped forward, "he will show you the kitchens and you will work with him there. Then, when you are not with him you are to accompany me when I go out. I would like to show my colleagues my find. I do like to brag."

"Yes, Miss." Was all Ghilan said, eyes downcast. She just didn't have it in her right now to fight back. Thinking how she thought learning common was so exciting, but now she wished she didn't know so she wouldn't feel the need to respond.

"Oh, right! I forgot. Your name. Dear, do you have a name or may I give you a new one?"

"What? Is she seriously asking this!?" Ghilan thought to herself incredulously, thinking it was hard to believe she actually had a choice in the matter.

She was about to open her mouth to tell Magister Elise, but she stopped mid way. She didn't want to taint the name her parents had given her. She didn't want that name to be the name that she was called by when she was being called upon as a slave.

"No, ma'am. I can't seem to remember."

"A pity. It might have been a lovely name. No matter." Elise looked at Ghilan with calculating eyes. "I had read some time ago, up on a few mythologies from old civilizations. My favourite, the one that came to my mind when you had first awoken was Nyx. A Goddess of night. Your long, dark hair and beauty, it will fit perfectly." Elise smiled at no one in particular as she clasped her hands together, "Now, Nyx go along with Arno and he will show you around. Later this evening I will be throwing a party to show off my new find."

With that she smirked and left. Ghilan and Arno headed for the kitchens as the other slaves went back to their work.

"So here we are." Arno stated as they reached their destination. "You know how to cook?" He asked.

"I may be a bit rusty but yes, I can."

Arno accepted her response with a nod. "Alright then. We will begin by preparing for lunch and then serving it. After we wash up and then get started on the evening's meals. We will be doing extra for Miss' party tonight."

Ghilan nodded and then abruptly changed the subject.

" You all look well looked after."

"Well, uh, yes ..." With a sigh, Arno explained.

"See, Miss – she isn't like most masters I've encountered. She lives alone and she is quite dependant on us slaves, probably due to her spoiled childhood. Miss has never beaten us to an extent where we could not work. She had never liked the idea of hurting others. She is just used to not having to do much for herself."

"You almost sound like you like her." Ghilan said with surprise.

"Her parents brought me to keep her company mostly and to watch and protect her. We are the same age so it was even better they had thought. We – we have history." Arno looked around and took a step closer to Ghilan, voice low, "She puts on a show for most because she wants to be taken seriously as a Magister. Most other Magisters don't because of her age. They think she is still too young to bear the title. But El – Miss is knowledgeable and adventurous. I spent a lot of time learning and exploring new things with her." Arno had a bit of a blush going on that Ghilan had caught. She saw an emotion in his eyes that felt dangerous to have in this predicament.

"You love her!" Ghilan stated with shock.

Arno's face had the look as if he'd just been caught stealing cookies from the jar.

"I – hmm. I have come to, yes. I had fallen years ago." His features softened. "I was a slave meant to keep her company. When we were old enough, she had gotten curious. She was hesitant when she asked me. She asked me if I even wanted to. I was already in love with her by then so I said yes." Ghilan just listened, too enraptured by his love story to interrupt. His face hardened a bit and his tone became more serious.

"We are lovers, or she uses me for that – is what I know she tells herself, because she knows it's looked down on, it is wrong, for a master and slave to have a romantic relationship. At least here."

He put a gentle hand on Ghilan's shoulder, "I tell you this because you look like you really have no idea what is going on, you look very confused. The others know she uses me in her bed, but that is all they know. They just assume that I am her favourite. But now there is you. I tell you this to let you know that you can trust me. And when I say that, you can also trust Elise, Miss. She will look after you."

Still a bit stunned by his confession she just nodded her head. "Alright, Arno. I wasn't expecting to hear that, but thank you."

He made to turn but then halted in his tracks and looked at her over his shoulder, "Oh, and Nyx?"

"Yes?"

"Try to keep a low profile on your magic. Your mana to be exact. Miss' sense isn't the greatest she and most likely others will catch on if you're not careful. You don't need to really worry about Miss, as you do the others. Magic in slaves can either be seen as adding more value to them or they are seen as a threat to get rid of." Arno said tapping a finger to his nose.

"So he must be a mage then." Ghilan mused to herself in thought.

With that out of the way they prepared the meals. Ghilan asking constant questions to get her caught up to date on things that she had missed while she was asleep. She needed to be caught up on everything, history, events, places, etc. She tried to be as inconspicuous as possible. He thought it was weird but he had obliged. She blamed seemingly ridiculous questions on the mild case of 'amnesia' she had.

As promised, Miss had thrown a party celebrating her find. It was Ghilan herself. Elise had told her guests she would be showing off the lovely elf she had miraculously come across in the forest she had been exploring. Saying she was lucky to have found a healthy, fit, young elf who was all alone. She was telling them how she had saved Ghilan's life and all the curiosities that Miss had about her.

"Oh, Elise you are such a lucky woman!" A magister by the name of Adonis had said jealously.

"A little jealous, are we Adonis?" Elise teased.

"Why of course! This beautiful young woman should be owned by a man, namely myself. I will put her to better use. Will you be selling her?" Adonis asked devilishly.

He was known for being a charmer as well as a womanizer. It is no secret of what he uses his female slaves for. "Disgusting pig " Elise mentally scrunched up her face. But she was as polite as her smile on her face as she dissuaded him.

Elise had begun to gently usher Ghilan along as she spoke in a low, whispered voice. "I apologize if Adonis made you feel uncomfortable, dear. That man has laid with more women than there are fingers on his hands combined. He is a disgusting pig. I don't know who invited him here. At any rate, I will not allow them to lay a finger on you. I don't want my find spoiled in any way."

"Thank you, Miss." Ghilan wasn't sure what to say to that or even if she was suppose to feel grateful due to that last part. However, she did. As long as Miss prevents them from coming near her like that again, she thinks to herself that Arno is right. Maybe Miss is trustworthy. Maybe they both are.


	4. Chapter 4

**(Tevene in bold)**

 **Slight mention of attempted rape. Sorry**

 **And any curse words like Fasta Vass, I left them as that because I don't know exactly what they mean ... and I don't actually like to use vulgar language.**

 **Also, thank you to my first reviewer!** **I hope I don't disappoint.**

 **I'd gladly take any criticism.**

 **I will be out of the city and most likely will not have access to internet. So there will be a few days delay on the next chapter.**

 **CH 4: Control ...**

 ** _\- Control by Halsey_**

"How has Nyx been doing recently?" Elise casually asked Arno while slipping into her attire for the day.

"She has been excelling very well and she has been a very quick learner." Arno smiled and gave a small chuckle, "She's a bit of a smart mouth." He worked on refastening his pants.

Elise smiled. "That is good to hear. I was worried about her at the start, but after these three years, she does seem more ... adjusted. All most comfortable. Well considering the circumstances." Elise shrugged, "She is not as lost as when we found."

"Agreed." Arno hummed.

It was silent between them for a few seconds.

"Arno, do you think I'm too cruel?"

He paused in his movements and turned his head to her.

"What is this about, Elise?"

She sighed, troubled. "I see the way some of the other slaves look at me. You and Nyx are the only ones who know that the cruelness and possessiveness is mostly just for show. Sometimes ... I can't stand myself. For the fraud I am. But I cannot allow the others to think I am weak and I cannot have them think that I have no business being in the Magister's ranks."

"I know Elise. You do what you must. The way I see it is that we are all lucky to have been bought by you rather than another. Surely there isn't another who would be as kind hearted as you. I believe, in a way you saved us from that cruelty."

"Arno, I ... thank you. That was just I needed to hear right now. You always know what to say to comfort me." They were both sitting in the bed now, hand in hand.

"Arno, you must know that I-I," Elise looked down at their entwined hands, "I really value having you here."

Arno read between the lines.

Over the years Ghilan had been pushing them, encouraging them to just be together. Ghilan saw that Elise and Arno cared for one another. Deeply. Though they would never show it openly in public.

"Elise," Arno's voice softened as did his eyes, "I know. And I do too."

At that Elise kissed him chastely and then they both made to finish getting ready for the day.

" **Nyx, I must ask you opinion**."

Elise had insisted that she would go to the markets today to celebrate her newest find. A few old relics she had come across. Magister Elise was planning on throwing a party once again, insisting that Ghilan accompany her in the preparations. Ever since Ghilan has been with Miss, Elise has thrown a party almost every three weeks, each year. Each planned in order for the Magister to show off her findings. And each party she deems it necessary to buy a new dress. Which is why Elise's demand had been voiced.

" **It is lovely, Miss. It will bring out the colour of your eyes and accent your features**." Ghilan replied. Elise smiled at her. Ghilan's Tevene has been improving ever so slightly. When Ghilan spends time with Miss, Elise had been finding moments here and there to teach her. Both Arno and Elise had taken upon themselves to do so about a month after Ghilan had been brought into the estate. Common was spoken from time to time in the estate and throughout the rest of the city. However, all the important stuff was said in Tevene. Elise and Arno figured that with Ghilan's great hearing she would be able to pick up on some valuable information.

Ghilan had found it a bit saddening though. She hardly spoke the language anymore. Elven, her language. Oh how she missed hearing it. It was like smooth flowing water. Her language was full of grace and beauty. Some of the elves of this time spoke pieces of it ... but it was broken and didn't have the same feel to it as it did before. She was restraining herself from speaking it too much, for she did not want to draw suspicion. It would just raise so many questions if she started taking fluently in Elven with ease. Her not speaking it as often anymore has her starting to feel like its been ages and she is getting the feeling that she is starting to forget. Little by little. She doesn't hear her own name called back to her anymore. She is 23 years old now (not technically) and every so often she has to tell herself, "My name is Ghilan, my name is Ghilan."

Not one day has gone by though that she doesn't remind herself of how she got here, of how she escaped Andruil and all the people who had saved her, helped her; her parents, Neil, and The Dread Wolf himself.

" **Thank you, Nyx. You are right about that.** " She turned to the women working the store, "I'll take this one." Elise beamed, getting her purse out.

Later that afternoon Ghilan was helping Magister Elise into the luxurious gown that she had just purchased. It was made from silk, but it had the appearance of veridium rocks. "Interesting", Ghilan thought.

"There you are Miss. You look lovely."

"Why thank you, Nyx."

As Ghilan turned to leave Elise caught her hand. Elise stood still for a moment as if she had caught a strange sent. Miss smiled.

"Wait, Nyx. I mean it. Thank you, for everything. For the past three years, having you here in the estate has been like a blessing to me. You opened my eyes, making me realize how foolish I had been being with regards to Arno. You've helped me on my expeditions, helped me gain popularity among the other Magisters. Nyx, I know us meeting wasn't on the best of terms and I certainly didn't give you the best impression. Arno's belief in me has made me more confident in myself and how I manage you all." Ghilan raised an eyebrow, wondering where this speech was coming from. It was just a party they were getting ready for, right?

"When I had found you in that forest, unguarded, unhealthy, I hadn't fully realized why I had done it. I had thought I was thinking with the mind of a Magister. But Arno made me realize that I was thinking like myself. I realized that it must have been the Maker who had our paths cross that day in the forest so I could save you." Elise stood, arms crossed. "You're probably wondering what brought this on, aren't you?"

"Um, yes, Miss?"

"I've recently been talking to a man, Dorian Pavus. His views on how Tevinter is ruled differs of that from the norm. He wants to make Tevinter better. To make it so it is not seen as though every person in Tevinter is evil. Of course they are just ideas, for now. But I believe I would very much like to see that. A Tevinter where Arno and I can be together openly and it wouldn't be seen as improper. It would be accepted and not looked down upon." Elise had a blissful smile on her face. Eyes shining with hope.

"That sounds like it would be wonderful, Miss."

"Thank you. And thank you for keeping Arno and I a secret."

Ghilan smiled back at her genuinely, "Miss, we all have secrets. I am happy that you felt you trusted me enough to tell me. Though now I feel that I owe you a secret of mine." With assurance she continued, "I would like to tell you my name."

"Oh! You remember?" Elise's eyebrows shot up, smile breaking into a full grin.

Ghilan shook her head. "No. I've always known."

Elise's grin faltered a bit.

"My name is -" Elise covered Ghilan's mouth with her hand and gave her a small smile.

"I don't need to know. If you kept it a secret all this time, it must be dear to you. Names are powerful things 'Nyx'. Be careful who you tell them to." Elise's grin came back fully as she dropped her hand off Ghilan's mouth. "Though if it would make you feel any better, I know you're a mage."

Ghilan's jaw slacked and Elise burst out laughing.

"I'm a Magister, Nyx. I've known from day one. But you have been doing well keeping it hidden." Ghilan blushed.

Elise studied her. "I can teach you the basics if you would like."

Ghilan's eyes widened.

"We have a few moments before the party. We can practice for a bit, right here."

"Miss," Ghilan began hesitantly, "I really don't think - I mean thank you, but I think I will be alright."

"Suite yourself, but the offer will still stand. I rather like the idea of an apprentice."

It was funny, Ghilan had thought. She escaped from a life of slavery only to end up in slavery. But somehow, over the years, Elise and Ghilan had managed to have respect for one another. Borderline friendship. It was insane in her mind that that would happen, but it did. And she found that she would be content on staying, especially if things were able to change. She felt, odd to say, but, happy.

The night of the party was, to Ghilan, a bore. Though she was enjoying in seeing Miss happy. Especially seeing the tiny lingering glances that Miss would give Arno. She thought it was sweet and she couldn't help but crack a smile.

Ghilan was standing near one of the exits. She was on guard duty, dressed in a dark blue leather vested tunic and leggings with golden accents that helped to accentuate her feminine features. Elise still did enjoy showing Ghilan off. The Miss continued to find Ghilan's features to be a rare exotic site. Ghilan's hair was done beautifully. Long, dark-as-night waves, curled over her shoulder. Her skin had taken on a darkish tan from the Tevinter sun. And her eyes were what drew the people in first. Icy blue and dark grey.

While she was on guard duty, Arno was standing with Elise. It gave them time together. Which, at that thought, made Ghilan smile a little bolder.

Unfortunately, who but Magister Adonis had to have been there to catch that smile.

"My, my dear girl. What a lovely smile you have."

He followed to where her gaze was focused on, to where Elise was dancing with Arno.

"You enjoy seeing your master happy? What a remarkable quality in a slave."

Ghilan felt his eyes roaming up and down. She didn't have to glance in his direction to tell. Miss had warned her many times about him. She practically spat on his name every chance she got.

"Listen, Nyx, is it?" Even though she knew that was not her actual name, she still hated hearing it from his mouth. "I've got an issue I need help with. Would you mind coming along and helping me with it. It is fairly large and I can't get it into the position I want it in on my own." He hid his devious smile under the false seriousness of his tone. And being a bit naive, she did not recognize his true meaning of that phrase.

However, she replied. "I'm sorry Sir, but Miss ordered me to be on guard tonight. I cannot leave my post."

"It'll only take a moment. Besides, she has strong, capable Arno with her. Along with a handful of her other slaves."

Not wanting to defy a Magister, she relented.

"Alright. If it is so urgent."

"Oh, it is."

He lead her to a small isolated room a few paces away from the ongoing party. Inside the dimly lit room was a few crates, boxes, and an immensely heavy looking object of some sort. She was guessing it was a statue. It had been covered over with cloth and bound by rope.

"You've grown since last I saw you, Nyx."

"Maybe it is best if someone else, who would be much stronger than I, to help you with this."

"Nonsense. It'll just need the two of us." Switching topics again, he mused, "Elise hasn't been allowing me to attend her parties lately. Why is that I wonder."

"I do not know, Sir."

He smiled knowingly. "Oh I think you've an idea."

She was acutely aware that he was standing behind her as they both faced the large object.

"It is a present for Elise. I want it to be a surprise, but I fear it will be spoiled if she notices it sitting in front of the door way. I would like to move it near the back wall." He braced his hands on the object. Standing a bit taller than Ghilan, his hands had been placed caging Ghilan's head between his arms.

"Come now, help me push."

He pushed from the top and she more to the middle. They were making little progress. It took minutes just to move it inches from where it was. It hardly budged. She was about to suggest they need to get a better angle, when she felt something brush against her. She didn't think nothing of it. Until it happened again ... and again. She was hoping it was an accident, and she just focused on trying to get the stupidly heavy object to move and then she could leave and wouldn't have to be near this man. But again and again it happened. He – he was rolling his hips into her backside, she cringed. She could feel him, his hardness. It was no accident. When he pulled away again she made to turn and push him away, to get out of his range. But as she began turning around, raising her hands to push him away, he caught her wrists. He held them in his hands, grip too tight, pinning her against the large object and his body, and the harsh roll of his hips against her. She tried to shout out but he pushed himself harder against her, halting her shout, turning it instead into a whimper of pain. He groaned and smothered her mouth with his.

That was it. She was furious now, no longer fearful. When he made to push his tongue into her mouth forcefully, she bit down hard, drawing blood. She tasted it.

" **Fasta vas!** " He yelled as he pushed her away and slapped her so hard across the face that she fell to the ground. He didn't give her a chance to even attempt to get up. He was on her in mere seconds. He was straddling her, ripping at her top and tearing off her leggings. He had fully overcome her. He got himself and her in the position he had wanted.

She was panicking, heart racing, anger flaring.

He was about to enter when she felt a surge of something, it was so cold it was hot, burning, bright, running through her body. It was hurting her. She had to let it out. She gripped both of Adonis' biceps, trying to fight back with the strength she had left. Her touch felt like a burning coldness. He yelped back in pain and saw that his arms where she had touched him were black.

He made a move towards her again, but she scrambled up fast and grabbed the fire poker sitting near the dimly lit fire. She felt the air around her change and she saw that, in his half naked stance, he was casting a spell. That bright energy that flowed within her returned as something heavy dropped in the air. The air was stilled. Though she knew she did something, she had know idea what it was, but what it was, was a Mana Clash spell.

Adonis looked stunned, and then furious. He was coming at her again, but she never gave him a chance for that second step. She moved quickly and pierced his heart with the fire poker she held.

The words came so natural, flowed so smoothly from her lips.

" _This ends now. You are finished._ "

And with that she let his body drop to the floor. She watched the life drain from his eyes as a pool of blood began to form.

And with sudden clarity she had realized, " _Fenedis Lasa!_ What have I done!"

As if by the Maker, Arno and Elise had been walking towards the room when they heard Ghilan's outburst.

"Nyx! Nyx! Are you alright?" They automatically asked as they stumbled into the room. They took in her appearance, torn up clothes, her hair a mess, and her hands held out covered in blood. Their gazed moved to the ground, seeing the pool of blood surrounding Magister Adonis' body. He lay half clothed, dead.

They looked back up to her.

" _Help me!" she cried._

Elise was the first to move. She took her shawl off and wrapped it around Ghilan. Arno had gotten started on cleaning up. They both seemed to know what they had to do.

"Nyx." Elise urged. "Nyx I need you to listen to me." She had taken Ghilan's face in her hands and spoke stern and clear.

"Nyx. I will not tell anyone what happened here and neither will Arno. We will clean this up somehow. Make it look as if Adonis was trying to attack me. Arno had come in and defended me. Alright?"

Ghilan was staring at her with disbelieving, far away eyes. She had never ...

"Nyx! I need you to run! If they find out you killed him, a Magister of all people, even if it was self-defence, they will kill you. Now run Nyx. Get out!"

Ghilan scrambled up and was about to run for it, but she turned and faced them for one last time.

"I give you your freedom." Elise said to her solemnly with a nod.

At that moment, Ghilan had saw her parents and Neil standing behind Elise and Arno. With that last image in her eyes, Ghilan took off running into the night.

She hated doing it. She was running. Again.


	5. Chapter 5

**CH 5: Recovery Begins ...**

 _ **\- Recovery Begins by Fireflight**_

 _ **1 Year Later ...**_

Thunder rumbled across the night covered sky.

"This rain. It's never-ending" Fenris droned.

"Oh cheer up Fenris. The rain is lovely. It washes away all the dirt a leaves the lands cleansed." Merrill reasoned, then added with a cheerful smile, "I also happen to enjoy the smell."

"There that should do it." Ghilan had come back to join Fenris and Merrill by the fire. She had just finished setting up a makeshift curtain at the opening of the cave they had decided to set up camp in.

Hearing the end of the conversation Ghilan added, "I have to agree with Merrill. I've always loved the rain as well. Especially the storms."

Fenris groaned and dramatically flopped onto his bedroll. "How did I manage to get stuck with two women who's thoughts are almost identical."

"I don't know if it is I or Merrill who should be insulted." Ghilan stated.

"Yes." Merrill agreed, and then it dawned on her, "Wait. What!?" With her staff in hand she said, "That was mean." She began bringing it up to give him a whack in the stomach with the end of her staff, but he was faster. Before it had made contact, he caught the staff and pulled Merrill towards him by it, trapping her with it as well, he had her seated her back to his chest. He leaned around and kissed her cheek and whispered low in her ear. The way he said it made Merrill shiver.

"No, this is mean."

He waited a heartbeat before he assaulted Merrill's sides with tickles, making her shriek.

"Ah! Fenris stop! Stop – I - I mean it!"

Fenris had rolled them so that Merrill was beneath him as he straddled her, trying to stabilize her writhing.

"Say 'please' now." Fenris continued fighting the grin forming on his face.

"P – Please. Fenris, I can't," her laughter was coming out in wheezes, "please stop!"

"As you wish." Fenris ceased, smiling triumphantly. He sat up right, but remained straddled on top of her.

He couldn't help it, but to bend down to kiss her. Her big beautiful eyes, glistening with joyful tears and her face flushed madly with red from her laughter.

Fenris thought how crazy it was. Here was this woman that he had hated when first met her. Even after he met her, he didn't give her a chance before. A blood mage of all things. However, she had wormed her way into his bitter, hard heart. He had been able to get to know her and was able to fall in love with. Despite the differences and differentiating views, he felt that Merrill had completed him somehow. She was the soft heart to his hardened one. Warmth to his cold. Cheerful to his bitter. Optimism to his pessimism. He had fallen for her before she him and he was grateful she did. Merrill had pulled him out of a dark place after the events of Kirkwall. It was a bit awkward at first, but they had comforted each other during that time of recovery.

Anders had fled with Hawke, as well as with Isabela. Apparently Captain Isabela had invited them to come with her on her ship. From what they heard last, was that Hawke and Anders parted ways from Isabela and were travelling together.

Merrill and Fenris had grown closer as they began spending more time together. He eventually told Merrill how he felt. She was utterly shocked at first; but she, being curious by nature, wanted to know if she felt the same. She had leaned in hesitantly and kissed him gently, unsure. Fenris, on the other hand, knew as soon as it happened that the deal was sealed. He would be hers as long as she would have him, and she, his.

They separated their lips from one another noticing Ghilan's doe eyed stare. Blushing furiously Merrill erected herself, staring straight into the fire at the same time Fenris had cleared his throat and shifted in to a more relaxed, casual, sitting position.

Ghilan chuckled. "You two make such a cute couple!" She cooed and the two other elves blushed even harder.

Ghilan had ran into Fenris and Merrill about a couple of weeks after she ran from Elise's estate. Merrill and Fenris had told her that they were coming from Krikwall, wanting to get away from the aftermath of what happened there. To most they were accomplices to Anders. So they were laying low, you could say. Ghilan had come to trust Merrill and Fenris immensely. So much, in fact that one evening, when Fenris had asked her about her time as a slave, he had questioned her about her name. He had wanted to know if 'Nyx' was her real name or on given to her. In exchange he told her of his. He told her that 'Fenris' is the name that was given to him by his former master, and that his actual name was 'Leto'. A good name she thought. However, since he couldn't remember his life as 'Leto', he would rather be called by the name of the one that he does, 'Fenris'. So, in return Ghilan had told them about her name. She told them that she would only tell people she trusted well. Though, they only knew about her name. They know nothing of where she is from, not even about her magic.

Ghilan, Fenris, and Merrill had started a small system of people who would work together to free slaves from Tevinter Magisters as well as in other areas. Their organization works in small units. Ghilan, Fenris, and Merrill being one of them. They are considered as the people in charge of their operations.

Currently, they had just finished escorting a group of slaves and were huddled out in a cave a few ways away from Redcliff. Which is where they were headed, before the storm.

"Ahem, well I think we should call it a night then." Merrill announced, still a bit red. Fenris looked at her and smirked, "Agreed."

Ghilan looked between the two and shook her head as she made to stand. "Better give them a couple of hours of privacy", she thought. Stretching she said, "I'll take first watch."

"Alright. I'll come out to relieve you later." Fenris replied, eyes slipping back to Merrill who was dousing the fire.

"Sure, just try and keep it down you two." Ghilan teased.

Merrill blushed madly. Fenris outright laughed.

"Ghilan! That was one time! I hadn't expected him to do ... uh ... do that." She started to calm down, as she didn't want to give details. Especially the way Fenris was looking at her right now.

"Have fun!" Ghilan smiled as she strode out of the cave to keep watch, pulling her hood up.

Four hours had passed. Ghilan somehow passed out for a time because Fenris was there, shaking her shoulder. She realized she was shivering, cold, and wet. It wasn't from the rain. Fenris knew those types of nightmares. He has had them from time to time. Less since he has been with Merrill.

"Ghilan, are you alright?" Fenris asked softly.

"Yes. I just must be really tired is all. Sorry."

He nodded. She had made to rise, but wobbled. He steadied her. Studied her face. Her short midnight hair soaked with sweat and dishevelled. Ice blue and dark grey eye rimmed with red. That and her being pale.

He was sensing she was weak. She has been weak for far too long.

"I guess I was more tired then I thought. I should head off now. Goodnight Fenris. Let Merrill sleep. I'm sure she needs it. Wake me again instead." She made to get out of his steadying grasp, but he held on and looked into her eyes.

"You're weak."

She was taken back, almost hurt. He saw that she thought her meant something else, so he elaborated.

"You're weak. When was the last time you replenished your mana? Taken in lyrium?"

Ghilan was startled. No one else knew besides Elise and Arno. All anyone knew was that her skills fell into that of a very skilled rouge.

Seeing her distressed face he explained. "My markings are sensitive to mana, to mages." He looked her in the eyes and said softly, "Why didn't you tell us?"

"It wasn't important." She tried to shrug it off.

" _Fenedis_ , Ghilan. You can kill yourself like this!" Fenris lectured. She was 24 now, and again she felt like a child.

"You are tired emotionally and physically, and you've been going without lyrium for Maker knows how long. You need to recover, Ghilan. You need lyrium."

" _No_ – no, I'll be fine."

Fenris glared. He unfastened his top armour and took it off. He held out an arm to her.

"Take some, Ghilan." Fenris ordered.

"What! No! Fenris, I won't do that!" Ghilan said in an outburst, though trying not to wake Merrill.

"Ghilan, we are out of lyrium potions and you are drained. The sooner we get lyrium in you the better you will feel."

Ghilan worked so hard at keeping it low enough so she wouldn't slip up. She didn't want to risk it.

"Fenris, I know you mean well –" She was cut off by him gripping her hands and placing them on his markings.

"Take it." He growled out. He was getting angry at her stubbornness.

She saw in his eyes that he would not relent.

With a sigh she gave in. "If you insist. But only a little. I don't want to harm you."

"Just – please. You need it. I can sense you slipping. It's like you're dying of hunger. Fading."

With that she kept eye contact with him as she pulled at the lyrium on his skin. She did it as if she were taking sips. Little by little. "It has been too long", she thinks to herself. She could feel her mana coming back to life. She felt lighter, more herself. She only took enough though, to have herself stable again. She did not have her fill, but she could feel Fenris tremble and his muscles twitch. Ghilan withdrew her hands away.

He stared at her knowing she didn't replenish herself completely, but he did not want to push her further. He let her go to get some rest and he took watch.

Ghilan lay in her bedroll. She thought to herself that she should now tell Merrill seeing as now Fenris knows that she is a mage. A very undertrained mage who doesn't know how to control her magic and her solution being to deplete her mana. Ghilan felt that not telling Merrill would be like lying to her. And now that Fenris knows it is only fair. She deserves to know as well.

And with her mind made up, Ghilan drifted off to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's note: Sorry for the bit of delay. I was out of the city again. Went camping for the weekend and now I've got vacation for a week, so maybe I can make up for it.**

 **There were also some ... personal issues. I don't really want to get into it. Let's just say that I've been down, not really myself or my whole self these past few days.**

 **Anyway ... now on with the story.**

 **CH 6: Crazy ...**

 _ **Crazy by Kat Dahlia**_

"Elganar, Ghilan! I can't believe you didn't tell me! I would have helped you. Trained you."

They awoke to a fresh, crisp dawn. The rain had left it's caring kiss on the plants and land. Ghilan loved it.

Currently, they were coming upon Redcliff village and Merrill was chastising Ghilan about her magical state.

" _I am sorry,_ Merrill. When I was a slave I was told by another that it was best to keep it hidden. I haven't been taking lyrium. I wanted to keep my mana low, deplete if necessary, due to my disappointing lack of knowledge of how to control it." Ghilan shrugged her shoulders with a sigh, "My fault really. I could've learned. I was just ... afraid." Ghilan explained to her dear friend.

It wasn't that she was lying. It was part of the truth. However, Ghilan still didn't want to, or rather, didn't know how to explain that she was from the time of when Arlathan still stood.

She hears Merrill, praying or calling on the 'Elven Gods', the 'Creator's' names. Ghilan strongly tries to resist the urge to scoff and roll her eyes. For Merrill's sake at least. But when she mentions Fen Harel. Ghilan doesn't know what to think. First, he is one to be feared. Second, he isn't so bad as the Dalish make him to be. When she had first met him that is what had gone through her mind. And thirdly, if he did in fact seal away the 'Gods', then she applauded him. Irrelevant of to what she thought though, Merrill's beliefs are more important to her and Ghilan didn't have the heart to crush them. She didn't want to go through the lengthy explanation of how she knew, then, how is she still here if she was from then. Honestly, Ghilan was still dumbfounded by that as well. Even though Ghilan is apparently a mage, it would still take someone with incredible skill and power to accomplish Uthenera. Which is what frightened Ghilan the most. If she was that powerful ... then she had no idea how to control it. What happened with Adonis was a fine example. She had no idea what or how she had done that.

"Merrill is right. You should have told us either way. We are able to help you Ghilan. You can trust us." Fenris raised an eyebrow, knowing full well that Ghilan did. Letting them know her name was a sign of her trust.

They planned to stop in Redcliff to gather supplies, weapons, equipment, and to rest and bathe. They had rented a room planning on staying for a night.

It was evening and Ghilan had decided to stroll around the village with Merrill and Fenris for a couple of hours. They were just outside the Redcliff castle gates when they heard what sounded like a fight. Fenris had stepped inside the area first, checking out what was going on. He signalled them to follow and they saw bodies on the ground.

"They look Tevinter." Ghilan said grimly.

"What are they doing here?" Merrill asked.

"I've heard rumours of a cult that was said to be of Tevinter, calling themselves the 'Venitori'." Fenris was bent down, examining one of the corpses. "After all, they do not look like normal Tevinter soldiers."

They continued getting closer to the entrance. Unknowingly they had stepped into the middle of a fight between demons, Venitori, and soldiers bearing the mark of the Inquisition that they have been hearing about.

"They look like they could use help." Fenris suggested, like he was asking if would make sense to wear at hat when it was sunny.

"Indeed." Merrill replied as Ghilan nodded in agreement. They readied their weapons and jumped into the fray.

With them helping out the battle didn't last long.

Ghilan had overheard someone shout, "Broody! Daisy! Great to see you!" during the fight. If she had to guess, it was the famous dwarf, Varric, she had heard about from them.

It was surprising to also see King Alistair of Ferelden there as well as it was to her surprise to see the Herald, a human, ally with the mages.

Later, as Fenris, Ghilan, and Merrill were about to head out after Merrill and Fenris had caught up with Varric, the Herald followed them along with their own companions. Ghilan had saw that the human had the dwarf, another human, and an elf along with her.

"Broody, Daisy! Wait up!" Varric shouted. "Who's your friend?" Varric inquired.

"Oh, this is Nyx. She is the one Fenris and I have been working with."

"This is she? Wow. I've been reading a lot about you from Merrill's letters." Varric bowed dramatically, "Varric Tetheras, at your service." He introduced. "It is a pleasure to finally meet you, Nyx."

"I've heard much about you as well, Varric."

At the mention of Ghilan's slave name, 'Nyx', the other human, a male, stepped forward.

"Nyx you say your name is?" The man looked her over and recognition sparked.

" **Kaffas**! You're her!"

Ghilan was confused.

"You're that elf slave that Elise was telling me about. She described you so well, especially your eyes. Very fascinating." The man jolted. "Sorry, Dorian Pavus. You know, Elise tells me that you are the one who inspired the change in heart of her." He smiled at her.

"Dorian Pavus. It is an honour to meet you. And I believe Miss – I mean, Elise had said the same thing of you. If not, I surely would not be here." Ghilan gave the young Altus a small bow. Not of a slave bowing to a master or one of higher rack, but a bow out of respect and admiration.

"Yes, well – ahem- it worked out well enough." Was all he said, a little flustered at receiving praise.

The Herald finally stepped forward along with the female elf.

"Wow, you guys fought well." The Herald said impressed. "My name is Evelynn Trevelyn. But just call me Evie." Evie extended her hand to each of them.

"Oi, bloody right! You guys were freakin awesome! Especially you, yeah!" The elven women pointed a finger in Fenris' chest.

His ear twitched a tad at the contact. "Thanks."

Merrill giggled.

"The way you went all glowy like that! That away to do it! Freakin awesome, that was." The elf backed up and shoved out her hand, " Name's Sera by the way."

Evie stepped in again. "Varric actually told me of the work you three have been up to. I think it's very noble of you guys."

"Thank you." They replied.

"How would you guys like to join us. Help us deal with that thing." Evie gestured to the hole in the sky.

"We are dedicated in helping the slaves. I'm sorry, but we have too much on our plate now." Ghilan rejected.

"You guys are very well skilled and we could use all the help we can get. If we fail, it wouldn't matter if you free them or not, you know. They'll end up dead either way." Evie said matter of fact, put bluntly. It stung and angered Ghilan a bit. Helping the slaves did matter.

"She has a point." Merrill voiced.

"Yes. Even if her words were poorly chosen." Fenris seemed to have had the same reaction as Ghilan had to those words.

"I could even offer assistance to your organization. Our people can help your people, while you guys help us." Evie offered sweetly.

Ghilan thought on it. Fenris and Merrill looked at her. They seemed to know what they were wanting to do, but they would stand by her decision.

"Very well." Ghilan sighed. "But I expect you'll keep your promise about lending aid."

"Of course. We will venture out right away to Haven after you've gathered your supplies. We had your rent on your room taken care of already. You just need to pack and meet us at the gates."

"Wait! How do you know we rented a room?" Merrill questioned.

"I have my ways." Evie set off, showing them a wicked smile on her face.

"Meaning she has a nosy spymaster who has agents that eavesdrop and sneak around." Varric supplied.

"Its already taken care of though? How did she know we'd agree?" Ghilan asked.

"Dunno. A hunch maybe. Evie's like that sometimes. Weird." Sera answered as she hoped off and hung an arm around Evie's shoulders.

"Okay then ..." Ghilan was unsure of how to respond.

"Well, lets go pack then. We best not keep them waiting." Merrill said.

The ride to Haven was long. But when they finally got there Ghilan was so relieved.

"Ahh, finally." She sighed as she stretched her arms and cracked a few bones.

" That was very unpleasant." Fenris said in his usual chipper tone.

"We can show you your lodgings. If you will, bring your packs and follow me." An Inquisition soldier had said and led them to a vacant cabin.

" Would this suffice. Would you like separate lodgings?"

"No need. This is fine." Fenris answered.

They had unpacked and settled in.

"Sleep. I need sleep." Ghilan whined as she crawled into one of the two beds. They were all out fast.

When dawn had broke, Ghilan had saw that Merrill and Fenris were still asleep. She decided to get dressed and explore a bit. She walked around Haven, noticing that there was a blacksmith, requisitions officer, training yard, stables, and a healers cabin.

Deciding to check out the potions, she headed into the apothecary. Though, when she entered she saw two men arguing.

A human man with a beard and an elven man, bald, with a voice that sounded so familiar, an accent like her own, but she couldn't place it.

"I've told you countless times, Solas, it will not work! Embrium was never intended to be used in such a way!"

"Very well, Master Adan. It serves me no purpose for me to continue to try and help you, when you are being so closed minded! I will leave you be then."

The man, Solas, made to turn to leave, colliding with Ghilan, but caught her arm and held her steady before she fell.

Time had stopped.

His voice. His hair was gone, oh but it is his eyes. The way he still carries himself. It is.

Solas stopped breathing. It wasn't possible. The face had changed due to maturity, had grown more into the beautiful women she now is from the girl she was, but he would recognize those eyes anywhere.

"You." Ghilan and Solas said in the same breath.


	7. Chapter 7

**CH 7: Perfect Timing ...**

 _ **Perfect Timing by Hurts**_

Still standing at the door of the apothecary, Ghilan and Solas were frozen in place. They hadn't moved any other part of their body, except for their eyes which took in each others features, in the minutes they stood there. Their look of shared disbelief was clear on their faces.

A queue started forming at the door.

An annoyed, rather loud, sigh resounded through their ears. "If you elves wouldn't mind, you are blocking the door. Please move." Adan announced.

They both jolted and they had noticed that they were in fact blocking the door as there were a couple of people waiting to get in.

Being that Ghilan was still in her state of shock, Solas had taken the initiative. Apologizing to the people wanting to get in. He ushered Ghilan into his nearby cabin. He opened the door for Ghilan to get inside first and then himself. Once they were inside Ghilan, ever so slowly, turned around, her mouth slightly open. Solas, still facing the door, locked it. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he too turned to face her.

They continued their 'staring contest' until Solas spoke, shattering the fragile silence.

"I've seen you before, haven't I?"

Ghilan nodded.

Solas' eyes had a slight pained wince in them. His voice sounding a bit emotional, he asked, "How?"

Entirely missing the question, Ghilan asked one of her own. She had to be sure.

"F-Fen Hare-" Before Ghilan could finish, Solas covered her mouth with his hand.

"I'd prefer if I was to be called Solas. Well, at least here, where others might hear. Many don't know who I am." He smiled. "I am ... laying low, let's say."

He removed his hand when she nodded her understanding.

"But ... it is you?" Ghilan asked, eyes still wide.

He held his smile, gave a small chuckle, "Yes, _little one._ It is."

Her eyes widened a bit more.

"And your name was a bit unusual if I recall." Solas searched his memory. "Ah, right. It is Ghilan, is it not?"

Mentally shaking the shock that prevented her from moving , she smirked as she covered his mouth with her hand. Her mind instantly took in how his lips felt under her palm. She still hadn't gotten over that small crush she had developed when she had first saw him. She shoved that childlike feeling out of her mind and replied, "Yes, it is. Though, like you, not many know me by that name."

She smiled when she felt him smiling back underneath her palm. He heart had fluttered a bit at that. "Stupid emotions! Settle down!" She thought to herself, keeping the smile on her face as she removed her hand.

"How have you managed to be here, in this time? I've seen no one else. I heard that the Pantheon was sealed away along with the 'Forgotten Ones', tricked by you." Seating herself on his bed, he grabbed a near by chair and seated across from her, listening to her as she continued. "Not that I'm complaining." She let out a breath, "It just feels like I missed so much." Ghilan had let the flood of questions pour out from her.

He took up the challenge and answered each according to the order she had shot them out.

"Firstly, I had gone into Uthenera. I only awoke a year ago. Secondly, when the Veil was formed the lives of our people changed dramatically. Magic had been strained, thus so was the lifespans of many. Thirdly, it is true. I had sealed away both factions. It was due justice for what they had done to Mythal. And thank you, but at the cost of our people, of all they had lost, all that is still lost, I am doubting my actions."

When she had heard him mention the shortening of life spans and the way it sounded, as if he was responsible, her eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

Seeing that he explained with self-blame in his voice.

"I was the one who had created the Veil, banishing the Pantheon as I had planned. But what I did not consider was our people's connection to the Veil. It has cost us a great deal."

She was going to fire with more questions, but Solas had beaten her to it.

"How have you come to be here as well?"

"I am honestly uncertain." She stated. She looked at Solas with calculating eyes and deciding it was safe enough to trust him ... most likely, she continued, "It seemed to be that I had gone into Uthenera as well. A few years after Neil, the merchant I was with, and I had left Arlathan. One evening I was exploring a forest alone. I came across a strangely familiar temple, though I know not what or who it was dedicated to. I was looking around and then ... I remember having this terrible headache. I laid down to rest a while. When I had awoken, I was in a home of a Magister of this time. Well it was about four years ago, but you get my meaning. It appears that I do in fact posses magic." She smiled nervously, wringing her hands together.

Solas' eyes widened.

She let out a disappointing sigh. "A very unskilled mage, with no idea of how to control it." She scoffed bitterly at herself, "The only thing I know what to do about it is to keep my mana low enough so I can't cast."

His eyes instantly hardened and he chided her.

"Ghilan. That is very dangerous. Mages need lyrium like we need to eat. You can do serious harm!"

"So I've heard. I got an earful from Merrill and Fenris."

At his questioning look she added, "My companions. My closest friends."

"Well you are lucky to have them then. They seem to be very sensible. More so than you."

Ghilan pouted, though he continued.

"An untrained mage able to go into Uthenera. Unknowingly. You must have extremely raw, natural, powerful, even, talent." Solas mused, sounding excited.

"What are you doing with the Inquisition?" Ghilan asked him, changing the subject.

"Well it seems we are all doomed to perish if we do not succeed. So, I figured I would lend my aid. Though, I am not as nearly as strong as when we had last met. And you?"

"Ha! We were sort of bribed. Played into joining." Ghilan replied with a tinge of irritation in her voice.

"Oh, how so?"

"Fenris, Merrill, and I lead and organization of many races working together to free the slaves in Tevinter. And wherever we can. They offered to send aid to our cells and in return we aid them, the Inquisition."

"Impressive. You and your group are very noble." Solas complimented.

" _Thank you_ , Solas."

She considered. A look of uncertainty on her face.

"What's wrong?" He asked concerned.

"It feels weird. Calling you that. 'Solas'."

He laughed and she startled, blushing a bit. She like his laugh.

"Yes well, I will have you know that 'Solas' is my actual name. The other was more like a title, an alias to me." It was his turn to ask thoughtfully, "I am curious. If most do not know you by 'Ghilan', then what name do you go by?"

"'Nyx'. 'Nyx' is what I was called by the person who found me. She was very knowledgeable in history and cultures. Apparently she thought of me as a night person."

Solas chuckled again.

They had talked with each other for hours it seemed. Both catching up with one another. Relived to know that they weren't alone. Relieved to see a familiar face from back then.

Their stomachs is what begged them to stop. Solas looked out his window. It appeared to be already mid day.

"I believe we should find some food." Solas stated.

"Oh wow! It's that time already?"

Solas opened the door. "Shall we?"

"Why yes, we shall good sir." Ghilan replied feeling giddy. He was so ... gentlemanly.

He chuckled and she blushed again. "Unbelievable!" She thought to herself as she walked beside Solas, who was leading them to the Tavern. "I'm like a child with a crush!"

She tried to ignore it.

They had went to scrounge up food and when they were looking for a place to sit, they found Varric, Merrill, and Fenris. They were beckoning for them to join.

"Chuckles! There you are. And you found Midnight!"

"Excuse me?" Ghilan responded.

"Ya know, 'cause of your hair. It's the colour of the night sky. And your eyes are like the stars."

She couldn't help it as she burst out laughing.

"Oh my, that was terrible!"

"Yeah, I regretted it the moment it left my mouth."

"Nyx, there you are! I thought you had gotten lost as well. Whose your friend?" Merrill questioned.

"Merrill, Fenris, this is Solas." Ghilan introduced. "And I am assuming you two already know each other then?" Ghilan gestured between Varric and Solas.

"We do." Varric spoke. "But how do you and our Solas know each other? Past lovers?" Varric egged on. Ghilan blushed a little. She turned her head to Solas and saw that the tips of his ears had gone a light shade of pink.

"No. We are ...," Solas looked at Ghilan and then said, "past acquaintances, friends I believe now. We were catching up."

"I bet you were. 'Catching up'". Varric said, gesturing quotations.

Fenris slapped Varric upside the head.

Fenris and Merrill were already in their shared cabin. Ghilan had wanted to give them their privacy again, they were a couple after all. She had stayed a bit longer talking and drinking with Varric and Solas.

When she was ready she bid her goodnights and headed out. Solas had risen up from his seat and did the same, following after her. At her cabin door he offered, "I could teach you. How to control your abilities."

Ghilan was about to decline as usual, when he cut in.

"And I would like to spend more time with you."

She blushed. Solas cleared his throat.

"I mean, I assume there are ... things we would still like to discuss with one another. It would be comforting to talk with someone who was from that time as well." He smiled and she smiled back.

"Yes, it would." She agreed.

They were standing close to one another and she would blame the excitement of the day for what she did next.

She threw her arms around his shoulders, hugging him gratefully. Pulling away from him, she gave him a kiss on the cheek.

She had stunned herself as well as him. She couldn't believe what she had just done.

He was blushing and she was sunburned.

"Ahem – well yes. Uh, _goodnight then._ " In a quick movement, she turned and disappeared inside the walls of her cabin.

" _Goodnight_." Solas said quietly to the door.

"Interesting." He thought and chuckled to himself quietly. Hand touching the cheek that she had put her lips to.

" _What a strange women."_

He walked back to his cabin. He decided it had been a very good day. It was strange, but he was excited to see her again tomorrow. And, it seemed, that his excitement had more to do with than just solving her mystery.


	8. Chapter 8

**CH 8: Thick as Thieves ...**

 _ **Thick as Thieves by Shinedown**_

 _The next day ..._

" _You know, you're not at all what I thought you'd be like."_ Ghilan remarked at Solas who was currently trying to show her the basics of how to control her magic.

At dawn they had risen, going a few ways out of Haven, to begin practicing.

" _I am not entirely sure if that is a compliment."_

" _Well, I mean everyone I had known back then had said you were to be feared. That you were powerful and ruthless. Cold, selfish. Very cunning and untrustworthy."_

Solas scoffed, offended but not surprised.

" _The first day we met I was terrified, honestly speaking. But when I saw you and looked into your eyes I knew there was more to you than what was spread. I see you now and you have changed a bit. You look more humble."_ Ghilan smirked. " _Or it could be just your change of ... style. Especially the hair."_ She chuckled and added teasingly, " _Bald suits you ..._ Solas. _Really though, I guess that's why I feel so comfortable around you. No offense, but I don't feel the need to bow down or cower in fear."_ Ghilan said, currently concentrating on the exercises Solas had instructed her to do as he stood as the observant teacher. Correcting her posture and reminding her to focus.

" _Thank you, Ghilan."_ There was a bit of a pause before he added, sounding a bit defensive, _"And for your information, I shave. It is far more practical."_

When they had returned, about an hour had passed. Solas had gone to his cabin and Ghilan went to go check in with Merrill and Fenris.

Coming towards the cabin she saw that there was an Inquisition soldier standing by Evie. It seemed that they were discussing something.

"Oh, Nyx! There you are! One of our cells was attacked!" Merrill burst out.

"What! How? What happened to them? Where are they now!?"

Evie spoke, "Apparently one of our spies spotted the slavers, the ones who attacked. They captured your people and their charges, along with our soldiers. According to the spy, they are being held captive just outside of the Tevinter border."

Ghilan was furious. This is why they got things done themselves. This is why they had to be involved directly. Her, Merrill, and Fenris were part of the group that was to escort the escaped slaves to safety. The escort was the crucial part! The way things worked most of the time was that they had people who would blend in as slaves. Those people would find a way to free them and then on their way out the groups were passed off to the escorts. Ghilan's group being the main cell in that process. If they were to run into any trouble , they would be able to handle it. A skilled rogue, mage, and swordsman is what they were.

She should have never left – never abandon them.

"We have to go. We have to go get them. This was a mistake." Ghilan said. She was trying to hold back from lashing out and blaming the Inquisition. Evie.

She made to move, going into the cabin to start packing.

Solas, coming out of his lodging, was on his way to inquire about his armour with the Blacksmith.

He heard the commotion as he was nearing Ghilan's cabin, which just happened to be on the way to his destination. He saw Ghilan. Solas started to smile in her direction, but it faded quickly when he saw that she was angry. When she mentioned leaving, he felt as if something slapped him or punched him in the gut. He didn't want her to leave. She was familiar to him. He needed familiar at this time.

Fenris was of the same mind as Ghilan. Merrill was hesitant, but she too started packing.

"Wait. Nyx, Fenris, Merrill. You don't have to go. We will send soldiers to –" Evie was cut off.

"To what! Get captured as well!" Ghilan rubbed her forehead with her hand and let out a sigh. The harsh words had come out before she could stop herself. She regretted it, but the harder part of herself told her they were words spoken truthfully.

Evie looked hurt. She tried to convince Ghilan again, but her mind was set. Ghilan had to save her people.

" _Stop!_ Stop, please. I – we must get our people. It has been an honour to meet you and be apart of this, the short time as it was, but it is clear that we are needed back."

Evie nodded, disappointed. She had just found a talented group of individuals, useful allies, and now she was going to lose them.

Solas had decided to intervene.

"Pardon me, Herald, Nyx, but I had overheard the situation and may I make a suggestion." The group regarded him. "Evie, have the Spymaster send her agents ahead and inform back with the captives and captors' position and numbers. Then have Commander Cullen send his soldiers and the mages who are able to dispel and disrupt mana, along with some former Templars. Ambush the group. Then at once have the spies take out the ones closest to the captives from afar, send the Templars and Mages to disrupt and slaver mages, and then lastly have the soldiers close in and finish with brute force. Leliana's spies will ensure that the captive group escapes to safety."

They all looked at Solas with surprise.

Evie with wide eyes said, "That ... actually may work. Great thinking, Solas!" And she hopped away to get started.

Solas turned back to the three elves, smiling at Ghilan. She glared at him. "And what am I suppose to do? We can't – I can't just stay here and do nothing!"

"Nyx, we are far away from the Imperium's domain. Even if we did leave, we might not get there in time." Fenris offered.

"Yes, precisely." Solas agreed. "Allow the Herald to help you. The Inquisition has agents already near that area."

"Fine." Ghilan walked into the cabin and slammed the door.

"Oh, she's angry." Merrill pointed out.

Fenris sighed, "Yes she is." Not really surprised in her actions.

"Is she always like this? So stubborn?"

"Yes." Merrill and Fenris replied in unison.

"When she feels she can do something but there are preventions in her path, yes." Fenris added.

Solas began thinking it was best to leave Ghilan to herself for a while.

Evie had after all asked him to accompany her on a mission. Maybe Ghilan will have calmed down.

Evie was taking himself, Cassandra, and Vivienne with her. "Oh joy. Vivienne." Solas thought sarcastically.

Ghilan laid in bed, staring up at the celling. She hated this feeling. She felt as if she should do something, but hated that she couldn't really do anything from here. They were right. Especially Fenris. If they had left now, it wouldn't matter. They wouldn't get there on time. She sat up with a giant huff and decided to do the meditation, the focusing, exercises that Solas had instructed her to do. He told her to do them whenever she felt overwhelmingly emotional. To help relax her body and nerves.

She repeated the exercises until she grew so relaxed and bored she fell asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

**CH 9: Pierre ...**

 _ **Pierre by Ryn Weaver**_

Ghilan awoke to Fenris nudging her side with Merrill's staff.

"Ghilan, wake up now. Commander Cullen wishes to speak with us."

When that wasn't working he tested the weight of Merrill's staff in his hands. Without any warning he wacked Ghilan's stomach with the pommel, just enough to hear that –

"Oomph! Ah! Fenris!"

"Ah, good, you're up. The Commander would like a word with us." He said with that evil smirk of his, acting like he did not just hit her in the stomach with a stick.

"Ooh, you will pay for that later mister." Ghilan warned, sitting up and rubbing her stomach.

Fenris turned around, eyes mischievously narrowed and said, "Try it."

Ghilan quickly got dressed and they were off to see the Commander. Though, she paused as they were leaving.

"Where's Merrill?" Ghilan asked Fenris. Those two are usually inseparable.

"She is already there." He replied pointedly.

"Nyx. Fenris, thank you for finding her." Cullen acknowledged. Fenris merely inclined his head towards him.

"First off, I want to inform you all that since yesterday's incident, the Inquisition has sent agents after yours and our people. Leliana has been getting constant updates every hour. It seems they are on their trail and will catch up to the captives and slavers soon."

"Oh that's wonderful!" Merrill said relieved.

" _Thank you_. Thank you." Ghilan said, grateful.

"Second. We are looking at assigning you three positions here in the Inquisition. We would welcome your aid. That is, of course, if you would like to."

"Such as?" Ghilan asked.

"Any spies, healers, and especially soldiers."

"Would we be separated?" Fenris inquired.

Cullen hesitated for a short breath. "Most likely, as it would depend on what set of skills each of you possess. As well as in what area you would decide to assist us with. It is your decision. I will not force your help in any particular manner. However, Leliana, our Spymaster, informed me that she can use some extra eyes. Not just necessarily rogues, but she will take any skills as long as they are able to do any form of espionage work required. She will be happy to keep you three together since you already know how each of you operates. That, and you trust each other. She will eventually add to your group of three if needed. It –" Cullen was interrupted by a hooded figure walking towards them.

"It will all depend on the situation that is assigned."

The figure raised their head and they saw that beneath the hood was a woman smiling at them.

"Leliana." Cullen greeted.

"Thank you for informing them of this while I took care of those missives." Her eyes went from Cullen's to taking in the three elves. "Has a decision been made?"

Fenris spoke. "Yes. I believe we will work with your Spymaster."

Merrill and Ghilan nodded in agreement.

"Excellent! I will have some work for you tomorrow. The rest of your day is yours." On that, Leliana had turned and left.

Cullen was about to turn back to his soldiers when Ghilan spoke up.

"Wait. Where is your Herald then?"

"Lady Trevelyn is off on a short mission in the Hinterlands. 'To run a quick errand' is what she said. Apparently she had promised Solas that she would look into something for him and she had found a lead. So herself, Solas, Madame Vivienne, and Lady Cassandra had gone. They should be back within three days. Give or take."

"Oh. Okay then. Thank you, Commander."

The three elves then went on with their day as well.

"Ghilan, lets take a walk." Merrill put a hand around Ghilan's bicep. Intentionally not including Fenris in this particular walk. He most likely would not be interested in what Merrill had intended to discuss with Ghilan.

"Umm. Okay. Sure." Ghilan replied. She wasn't quite sure where this was going.

"Oh, don't look at me like that! I'm going to show you how to make some restoration potions. There's a lot of Elfroot around here." Merrill explained. "Would you care to join us Fenris?" She asked.

"I will pass. I think I will challenge that dwarf to game. It has been too long it seems."

Ghilan had a feeling. It was not just the Elfroot that Merrill was after.

"So ... Ghilan. You and that man, Solas. You two know each other?"

Kneeling down in a patch of Elfroot they had been harvesting.

"Yes. Well actually are still more of acquaintances, but I think we are getting along. I may even call him a friend."

Merrill nodded. "You two had spent a lot of time together the other day."

"Yes. We were catching up. We haven't seen each other in ... in what feels like a lifetime."

"Do you trust him?"

Ghilan was starting to get a suspicious feeling. "Yes? Merrill, why are you asking?"

"Because you say acquaintances, you hardly know or knew him, but you say you trust him." Merrill pointed out where her confusion laid. She was struggling, tugging at a very stubborn plant.

"I do. I guess. I mean – I see it in his eyes. The way he carries himself, his mannerisms. He has this ... I don't know how to explain it ... an aura? Anyway, that and we talked for a while and we had been able to get to know each other a little more."

Ghilan blushed as she recalled that impulsive movement, the hug and kiss on his cheek she had given him after their talk.

Merrill had seen the blush, noticed the way Ghilan sounded when she talked of him. Merrill smiled wide, with an Elfroot in her hands as she beamed at Ghilan.

Ghilan had noticed Merrill had stopped moving out of the corner of her eye and held silent. She looked toward her.

"What?"

"Oh, you like him. As in, you have feelings for him!" Merrill gushed.

"What! _No!_ No, Merrill you're mistaken."

Seeing Merrill unfazed, she blurted, "Merrill, I just barely know the man!"

"Aww, but I can tell you do Ghilan. I haven't heard you talk about anyone like the way you did about him. Especially with that look in your eyes."

"What look?"

"Oh, you know. With warmth, admiration, caring, ... longing ..."

"I – oh, it – Merrill!"

Seeing Merrill's triumphant stare, Ghilan conceded.

"All it is, is a little crush. That's it. Nothing more." Though, Ghilan wasn't sure who she was trying to convince. Although, Merrill seemed to accept Ghilan's confession.

"Oh! That's so romantic! And an older man too, Lethallan _._ But he is very handsome and seems very nice."

"Merrill, I said a crush! _Fenhedis,_ you make it sound as if I'm to marry him."

Ghilan decided that it was time to change the subject. "I think we've got enough Elfroot, Merrill. Let's get back."

"Hmm ... Oh, oh! Right! Let's." Merrill said remembering why they were there in the first place.

The walk back was more calmer. Though, Ghilan did feel compelled to mention something important to her friend.

"Solas offered to train me. With my – my magic."

Merrill only smiled kindly. "Come on. Let us get started then. We may need these potions for tomorrow."


	10. Chapter 10

*****Edited... I realized much later that I wrote Blackbeard instead of Blackwall. Well then. I just had one of those face palming moments. :P**

 **CH 10: Come Together. ..**

 _ **Come Together by The Beatles**_

"So this is what the Spymaster had intended for us?"

It was early evening, the sky just starting to darken. Having arrived at the location of their mission, as been given by Leliana, they have been staking out the mansion for hours now. Leliana's task that she had assigned to them was simple. Retrieve and dispose of any documents that contain the ridiculous lies, rumours written on them and have been being spread about the Inquisition, as well as to ... take care of the source of these rumours.

As of now, they were just waiting for an opportune moment.

"It is a little too simple it seems."

Ghilan commented, suspiciously unsure about this task. "You think she underestimated our abilities or is this some sort of test?"

"Maybe it is a test?" Merrill offered.

"Quiet." Fenris hushed them as the guards went inside the estate. Seeing them enter and waiting a few heartbeats later, "Alright, it's clear," turning his head to address Ghilan, "Ghilan?"

"On it." She replied and she was off.

Clinging to the shadows as if she was born of them, she manoeuvred herself over the shrubs, and up towards the threshold. When she got to the door she nimbly and quietly picked the lock open. She remained as silent as the night itself. She did a quick scan of the interior, her eyes quickly adjusting from the darkness to the dimly lit estate. Seeing no one in sight at the moment, she signalled Merrill and Fenris to follow. When the stepped inside they saw two rooms on the level they were standing in were lit. Then, on the upper level, a third room was open and lit as well. All other rooms were either closed or had no forms of light nor any movement or signal of life. The people occupying the open and lit rooms were laughing, clanging glasses, and cheering.

Perfect cover.

Ghilan signalled to Merrill, gesturing to the two lit rooms on their current level. Merrill had done her best to be as stealthy as she was able, creeping up to one of the rooms. From the dark, which obscured her from view of the occupants, she cast a sleeping spell on them. The same was done of the second room.

Now they had a time limit. Rather than fighting everyone in the entire household they really would prefer just to have to handle a small amount. It seemed unnecessary for how they planned to handle this. Plus, Fenris had promised Varric that they'd be back in time for a game of Wicked Grace and drinks ... with everybody. A form of getting to know one another.

Now that the groups on the main floor were dealt with, they headed up the stairs to the last dimly lit room.

Ghilan scoped the remaining room out, staying near the doorway using her ability to seemingly disappear.

Three large men, warriors. A couple of shifty looking ones, rogues. To their surprise though, no mages. Lucky.

Ghilan gestured to Merrill, she wanted her to cast a paralysis spell on the group. They did need to deliver a message after all.

Once that was done, being able to tell by the gasps and struggling breaths along with some curses and whatnots at the inability to move, Ghilan revealed herself.

"Good evening. I hear you have some papers regarding rumours, lies about the Inquisition that you people have been spreading around. Where might those be?" Ghilan asked them firm but sweetly.

"Scr - screw you knife-ear! We ain't telling ya!" One of them shouted, struggling against the invisible binds.

They were on a time limit.

"Oh, now why would you talk like that? I've asked you so nicely." Ghilan strolled up to the man.

Ghilan had a scary streak. Fenris had found this out a while, maybe a month, after working with Ghilan. She would make these sweetly sounding threats. Hearing those kinds of threats from her were the threats that would make him a little nervous. He definitely would not want to be the one receiving them. They were said innocently but oh, were they deadly. He shivered a little at the thought.

As she got nearer to the man, she passed another which took the opportunity to spit at her heel. It had just barley missed her wrapped, barefoot feet. She quirked an eyebrow at the man. At this point Fenris and Merrill had decided to make themselves known. The group of paralyzed men stared at them. Some had turned their eyes back to Ghilan. Ghilan bent down to the man who spoke.

"I'll ask one more time 'Shem'. Where are those papers?" She smiled and her smile remained throughout his response.

"When this thing wears off, I'm gonna enjoy making you scream. I've got forty men in here, we can easily take care of three knife-ears!" He managed to smile back menacingly. "I'll save you for last though, the both of you lass', but you for sure." Fenris was strongly trying to control his fury at this dead man's words. Ghilan could handle it. "For entertainment. We'll take turns, making you scream, breaking you, pounding into you one after the other like the dirty who—" His words died in his mouth. The sound of blood muffled any notable words left. Ghilan had stabbed him in his gut with the dagger she had stealthily slipped into her palm. It wasn't lethal mind you, they still needed a message to be heard, and they needed to shut him up. They were after all on a schedule. And that was very rude.

"That was not the answer I was looking for." Ghilan smiled again as she strode over to a younger looking fellow. Clearly out of his depth and scared.

"Now, might you be able to answer my question?" He was and did so shakily.

"Thank you, good man."

Ghilan walked over to the desk where to young man pointed to. She took out papers and gave a glance and they were in fact the rumours being spread. She handed them to Merrill who set them a flame. Another soldier was about to shout out a vulgar comment until Fenris intervened. Phasing, shoving his fist into the man's chest, doing no real damage, just making him scream, Fenris provided some ... incentive to these people.

In a voice sounding full of authority, Ghilan addressed the group. "As you can see, my friend here doesn't like you guys that much and quite frankly, neither do I. You have all been terrible. The Inquisition kindly asks you to cease these idiotic rumours. Notice, I had said kindly. If you do not stop we will be forced to use more," Fenris released the screaming man to the floor in a sweaty, trembling heap, "... harsher methods. We thank you for your time and cooperation."

And with that they left, minutes before Merrill's spell had completely worn off.

"Excellent work you three. Now we shall wait and see if they will actually heed our warning." Leliana praised them upon hearing their report. They had made it back hours later that very evening.

"It seemed ... too simple." Fenris stated and Leliana's smile turned sly.

"I admit I had wanted to see how you three performed as a unit. I had wanted to give you a situation in which I was able to learn what you three are capable of, and to test your capabilities to obtain information, especially without detection. You guys did well."

"So it was a test! Oh, Nyx, you were right!" Merrill congratulated.

"So you knew?"

"It was a hunch. I believe we all drew the same conclusion when we found out what the mission entailed." Ghilan replied.

"Hm, you three are perceptive." Leliana's smile grew. "That's good. I will see you later and I will call on you three for further assignments. Great work today."

"So, how about we join Varric for that game?" Fenris asked, reaching for Merrill's hand.

"Oh that would be fantastic. Then you can try and win back the money Varric won from you last time." Merrill said.

"Hey, what do you mean 'try'. I am most certain I will win this time."

"Fenris, you'll need a good amount of luck and prayer in order for that to happen." Ghilan teased.

He scowled at that, but he started to dawn a suspicious looking smirk as an idea formed in his mind.

"I do not need luck." He started. "but the Maker did provide me with a very stealthy woman who just happens to be one of my close friends."

Merrill caught on and wacked his shoulder.

"Fenris! You can't cheat!"

"Why not! The dwarf probably does!"

"Oh no doubting that he does." Ghilan agreed.

They entered the tavern, being welcomed back by the distinctive smells and commotion of almost any other tavern. Near the back was a group of tables moved together to form a bigger area. Around those gathered tables they had spotted a few people they had met in Redcliff along with some others faces which they hadn't met yet. Well, now is their chance.

"Broody, Daisy, Mid –," Varric started to mumble to himself, "ah no, hmm, ach, fine never mind –," ... and then giving up, " - Nyx! Great to see you guys made it. Pull up a seat, join in!"

Ghilan smirked at the greeting he struggled to give her. "Did you give up with my nickname, Varric?"

"Never. Just you wait. I'll think of one for you, don't you worry. Come on now, I'll deal you guys in."

In the spirit of getting to know one another, every turn each of them had, they would have to mention something about themselves. Anything really.

"Pfft! Anythin' you say yeah? So even the obvious stuff like; I'm an elf and Blackwall has a friggin' unruly beard?"

"Oh Maker! You're an elf!?" Blackwall gave Sera a surprised look with mock shock in his voice.

Sera snickered. "I know, right!"

"Well, maybe not that obvious." Varric explained. "Unless ... you really aren't an elf Buttercup." He mumbled after more to himself, "That would explain some things."

"Don't be daft."

The Qunari, The Iron Bull or just Bull, thought that Dorian was attractive. To which Dorian replied, "How can you not. Out of everyone sitting at this table, it is clear that I have the finer tastes in fashion." He gave the woman dressed in fine silk a apologetic look, "Sorry Josephine."

She quirked an eyebrow slightly. "Ahem – well, yes. No offense taken, I suppose. You are rather ... flashy."

They continued their game of Wicked Grace and of getting to know each other well until later, near morning, drinking and chatting. Cullen had won the game, to everyone's surprise, even his own. Ghilan had kept an eye on Varric's hand due to Fenris' suspicions and helping him out as well. Covertly of course. Though, even with her roguish abilities, she still had no idea how Cullen had won. Luck and the Maker were clearly on his side this evening.


	11. Chapter 11

****Sorry it took a while. It was longer and I usually only write at night (the only time I really have to myself ... :P So I end up getting too tired to finish. I work early in the mornings and I have problems sleeping... so .. yeah ..)**

* oh and i haven't figured out how to make larger spaces between the paragraphs i want, so thats why it seems rushed maybe and that it jumps from one part to the other ... so yeah. :P :) *

 **CH 11: It Has Begun ...**

 _ **It Has Begun by Starset**_

"Thank you again, Herald, for your assistance."

"Not a problem, Solas." Evie replied. "Well, that's one rift closed ... and many more to go."

They were making their way back inside Haven's gates. Evie had given her thanks to Cassandra and Vivienne for accompanying them. She then made her way over to Cullen and his soldiers. A blush starting to make an appearance on her face.

Solas departing as well, decided to check up on Ghilan. He couldn't explain it that well as to why he was spending time with her. The simplest reason would be that she already knows who he is - Fen Harel. However, he is quick to remind himself that she does not know what he has done. That he is responsible, maybe not directly, for the gaping tare in the sky. His thoughts drag him down into his guilt and self blame. She knows not of what he had planned – is still planning to do.

He hears her voice in the distance and he manages to crack a small smile from that. Solas' ears follow the sound which he finds is coming from near the three's shared cabin, in the clearing behind the cabin, to be precise. To his ears, as he draws nearer though, it sounds as if she is fighting.

He quickens his pace.

"You need to firm your stance Nyx. You are quick to dodge, but you will have to eventually block and be able to hold your ground."

"I know, Fenris. You're all muscle though and I'm no-.."

"You have enough. And it isn't about muscle. It's about firming your stance. Now again."

Solas walked up seeing Merrill and as he got closer towards her, he noticed that apparently Fenris and Ghilan were just sparing, to his relief. Or rather, it sounded as though Fenris has been trying to teach her some defensive skills.

Ghilan moved with such speed and grace, that it was hard to anticipate what her next move was going to be. Her make shift 'daggers' were a blur held by agile hands that twirled and cut through the air as she would strike.

Solas was amazed. Ghilan fought with passion and intensity, eyes wide and wild. Seeing her opponent's moves before they were made. She wielded her weapons as if they were apart of her. Her actions quick and precise. It was the first time he has been able to witness her in any form of combat. He marvelled at the fantasy of being able to see her fight like the mage she truly is. He had no doubt that it would not be any different. He found the thought fascinating.

However, she would need to get comfortable with her magic to do so. It will take time, but he is determined to see that fantasy become reality. He is very glad she accepted his willingness to teach her.

Merrill had spotted him from the corner of her eye, seeing his jaw slightly slack in awe.

"It is good to see you've returned, Solas." Merrill greeted.

" _Thank you_ , Merrill." He replied, turning to address the scene before them, "She is quick and fights well."

"Yes. She is almost as good as, Isabela," Solas gave her a questioning look. "Someone I know." Merrill carried on their conversation about Ghilan. "Fenris and Ghilan are almost matched in speed but he is a lot stronger and tougher. He knows her moves and her fighting style. They fight well together."

"Indeed." He agreed, seeing Fenris moving with speed, agility, and brute force.

"Although, she has trouble with blocking. She has always been light on her feet. Fast enough to avoid being hit and he has always watched her back and covered her. Since we joined up with Inquisition though, Fenris had been thinking it would be a good idea for Nyx to start learning how to block."

"I see. It would be wise for her to learn."

Ghilan staggered again from the blow that Fenris delivered.

"Oomph."

"Nyx." Fenris warned. Not even needing to clarify on what.

"Let's do it again. I think I'm getting it." Ghilan urged

"Just remember; anticipate the blow, find you centre – balance, firm your stance and ground yourself. Make yourself be as if you are a solid rock. Immovable." Fenris instructed.

Ghilan nodded and they began the dance again.

Ghilan sensed it was coming and she prepared herself for the blow. She thought herself as immoveable. Fenris had attacked again and she skidded at the impact, but when he went to give her a shove with his body, she held on. She stayed stubborn and firm. Fenris backed off.

"Alright then. Better, but it still needs work. For now, rest." Fenris looked towards Merrill who smiled at hearing the praise and encouragement he had given Ghilan. He noticed Solas was standing beside Merrill.

"Besides, I think there is someone here who would like to speak to you." He smirked.

Ghilan turned around, wiping the sweat from her brow and breathing heavily. Her eyes widened.

"Solas! Lethillin! You're back!" She ran to him with excitement. Moving as if to embrace him, but then thought better of it.

"Aneth ara." She smiled

"Aneth ara, Lethallan." He smiled back. "You were quite impressive."

" _Thank you_ , Solas. Fenris is teaching me how to block."

"I saw that." Solas inclined his head to Fenris, who had nodded back in response.

Fenris strode over to them. "We still need to work on it."

Ghilan rolled her eyes. "Yes, Haren."

Fenris made a disgruntled sound. "Do not call me that."

Ghilan chuckled and it was Fenris' turn to roll his eyes as he cracked a smirk.

"But, thank you, Fenris. I do appreciate it."

"You are welcome, Nyx. We will try again tomorrow provided Leliana had no assignments for us that day."

"If I may, Nyx," Solas interjected, "would you be free this evening? Let us say around dinner?"

"I presume so. Why?"

"I would like for us to continue your training on your ... other abilities."

Fenris, Merrill, and Ghilan dawned confused looks. Fenris was the one who caught on as to what he was saying.

"You mean her magic?"

"I – uh, yes. You two know?"

"Yes. You know as well it seems." Fenris stated.

"Yes, she had told me."

"Well then ..." Fenris just let out, not exactly sure what to say.

Ghilan decided to explain this situation to Solas.

"Solas, anyone I trust enough knows that I posses magical capabilities. However, anyone I trust that much is standing here presently. You all also know my actual name, 'Ghilan'. So feel free to call me that when it is just us or out of earshot others."

"Oh, well then that makes things a bit easier." Solas said. Turning to Merrill and Fenris he addressed them. "Would you two like to join us later?"

"We'd love to!" Merrill replied excited.

"Then let's eat dinner together and then head out." Ghilan suggested.

It seems that she was everyone's entertainment for the day.

After they had eaten, the group made their way towards Solas' cabin. Fenris was curious.

"So, what magic have you been training her in exactly?"

"For now we are simply working on her ability to sense her mana, her magic. It would be best for Ghilan to feel it first within her being. How it flows within her, before casting any actual spells. I also want her to start taking in Lyrium. Small quantities first, gradually introducing her mana to the lyrium. She has been depriving her body of it for so long that too much at a time would do more harm than good."

"That sounds ... well thought." Fenris approved.

Solas led them inside his lodgings as Fenris continued speaking. "Just before we came into Redcliff, Ghilan had passed out due to her weakened state. I had forced her to use the lyrium from my markings to replenish herself." At Solas' widened look he added, "We had no lyrium potions at the time and I was desperate. Worried. I had never seen her pass out before. I lent her a small amount. I wanted her to take more, but she only took enough that she was able to stand on her own."

"That was quick thinking on your part. You probably saved her life." Solas praised.

"You know I'm right here you guys!" Ghilan stated annoyed that they were talking about her as if she were not present.

"Oh we know." Fenris smirked.

"Fenris, when did she pass out!" Merrill piped up with worry.

"The night before we arrived at Redcliff, during the storm, Merrill. I'd been sensing something off about Ghilan, but I didn't know what it was until it was almost too late. I found her passed out, shivering, and pale." He added grimly, recalling on a memory of his time enslaved, "The only other time I remember of when I had sensed something similar, was when Danarius had completely drained his mana during a battle he had fought with another Magister. It was strictly between the two, no one was to interfere. No lyrium or blood magic. He was about to die because of the state he was in."

"Ghilan!" Merrill whined. "Please take better care of yourself!"

"Yes, please do Ghilan. You have people who care for you and would rather see you well, rather than sick due to hiding your abilities." Solas reprimanded.

Ghilan felt ashamed. She looked down and turned her head away.

"Yes, you are all right. _I am so sorry_."

Solas sighed. He laid a hand on her shoulder and asked, "Shall we begin?"

Ghilan looked him in the eyes and nodded her head.

He smiled. "Alright then. Take a seat." He said gesturing to his bed. Merrill and Fenris moved out of the way to observe.

"I want you to close your eyes and try to sense your mana. Like before."

Ghilan closed her eyes and focused. She felt a kind of emptiness. An ache. She sensed that she was still weak, but not like the time Fenris had saved her.

"Wow, it's so low." She commented.

"Yes – well, that isn't exactly good, but it is pleasing to hear that you can sense it. Explain what sensations you get when you focus on your magic." Solas urged.

Ghilan did as she was told.

"Umm, it feels small, but bright? It feels really cold ... but burning hot at the same time? Ach, it's hard to describe. It feels as if it is not a specific thing. It feels dark but bright, hot but cold. I'm sorry, I'm not really sure what I'm feeling from it."

"No, Ghilan. You did well. Your mana is low still, which may make it difficult to get the proper sense for your magic's nature. However, you were still successful. You managed to at least get a hint of the feel for it. As we progress and your mana rejuvenates, it will become easier." Solas explained and Ghilan smiled gladly.

"It sounds as if she'll be an elemental or a spirit mage." Merrill interjected.

"Yes, however, it is still difficult to tell until we get her mana up."

"Of course." Merrill said, agreeing with Solas' assessment.

Solas handed Ghilan a small vile of Lyrium potion.

"Drink this ... slowly."

Ghilan eyed it suspiciously. She looked up to Solas, then glanced over to Merrill and Fenris, and then back to Solas. Solas merely nodded. She shut her eyes tight and drank the blue liquid slowly as instructed. She coughed a little, but she continued on. It started to burn her belly, however she was actually starting to feel a little better than she had been in a long time. She drank the rest of the tiny vile and then wanting more.

Solas shook his head reading her eyes.

"Only a little, Ghilan. You do not want to become ill."

She pouted and he couldn't help that he found her adorable in that moment. She had a small droplet of the blue liquid left clinging to the corner of her bottom lip. It wasn't that it was noticeable, but he figured it was because something he spotted was out of the ordinary and it immediately drew his attention, for a short while. And in that short while he couldn't stop the thought that formed in his mind. He wanted to lick it up. And then that thought led to one of kissing her. He quickly shut the thought down. Solas mentally shook his head, cleared his throat and smiled.

"We will continue this routine, Ghilan, until you become more comfortable with the presence of your magic and until your mana is fully replenished. Little by little of course. Then we may start on some spells." Solas explained.

Ghilan smiled brightly. " _Thank you,_ Solas. I am very grateful for this. For what you're doing for me. For what you are all doing for me."

The Merrill beamed, Fenris inclined his head with a smile, and Solas smiled at her warmly.

"No thanks are necessary. It is my pleasure, Ghilan." Solas replied.

Ghilan was about to open her mouth when they heard the commotion and the bells ringing.

They looked outside, stepping out of Solas' cabin. They heard a shout.

"Someone is attacking!"

"Under what banner?"

... "None."

All four of them ran towards the gates of Haven, towards Evie, Cullen, Cassandra, Leliana, and Josephine.

"What is going on?" Solas questioned.

"Someone is coming with an army, they look like they are –". Evie was interrupted by banging on the front gates of Haven.

"Please let me in! I can't come in unless you open!"

They opened the gates to find a pale young man. He marched right up to Evie.

"My name is Cole, I came to warn you, to help. People are coming to hurt you, but you probably knew that already."

"Just tell me what's going on." Evie said impatiently.

The young man took a more serious tone. "The Templars have come to kill you."

"The Templars? Is this the Templars' response!? Attacking us because we've taken aid from the mages!" Cullen said raged by the Templars' actions.

The young man, Cole, continued. "No. The Red Templars went to the Elder One. Do you know him? Because he knows you. You took his mages." Cole turned and pointed towards the distance where some sort of creature stood tall amongst the marching army. "There." Turning back to Evie, "He's very angry that you took his mages."

Evie face went pale but then automatically hardened. With a sharp turn of her head, red hair whipped around behind her in a tail like fashion. "Cullen, give me a plan, anything."

Even in this dark terrifying hour, when all of Haven's soldiers gathered as one army, it was a magnificent sight.

Evie gave her orders to her companions and asked that Solas, Varric, and Blackwall to help her get the trebuchets cleared, up and running.

Ghilan, Fenris Merrill, and Evie's other companions were ordered to assist the soldiers and anyone in need.

The Herald had made the final blow and an avalanche, far off, came crashing into most of the Templars' forces. However, it was Varric's shout that had made everybody's cheering heart go still.

"HOLY SHIT! A DRAGON!"

Ghilan looked up to the sickened sky. Coming in closer and breathing down fire was indeed, a dragon.

It rampaged through the small village. Setting a blaze cabins and injuring and killing many in its path. Evie had ordered everyone to help the survivors and to get inside the Chantry. Most soldiers were fighting off the remaining Red Templars. Evie's and Ghilan's group had spread out to help the survivors.

Solas heard shouting coming from near his cabin and he broke off from his group and ran towards it. Ghilan, hearing it too, did the same. Running off from the other direction towards the shouts for help.

They both came upon the source, breathing heavily.

Adan and Minaeve were trapped.

"Hold on! We'll get you both out!" Ghilan shouted over the chaos that surrounded them.

"Solas! _Help me!"_ Get Adan and I'll get Minaeve!"

"Alright!"

They got to their charges and bent down to lift the planks off. Minaeve cried out, "It's coming back!"

Solas and Ghilan moved faster, ignoring the burning sensations on their hands. Well, at least Ghilan ignored it. It seemed like Solas was using a barrier of some sort. "Well, that certainly would be useful." Ghilan thought to herself as she endured the pain.

They had gotten out Minaeve, but Adan's legs were wedged considerably.

"Just go. Save yourselves." Adan started to sob, giving up as he saw the dragon swooping in again. It's giant maw opening.

" _No!_ "

"Nyx. _It's too late. We have to go._ " Solas pleaded.

" _I said, no. I will not leave him behind."_ She said defiantly.

The air around them had changed. Solas felt it. Something was growing. He looked at the incoming dragon and then back to Ghilan. He ran to her side and aided her in a final attempt. He cast a large barrier around them and got started on trying to free Adan. He glanced up at her, noticing she was still, looking straight at the dragon, with anger, with vengeance. Her fists clenching and unclenching. However, he chose to ignore her and just focus on Adan. He would trust her – with whatever she might be doing, planned or not.

The dragon opened its maw again, letting flames spill out. Suddenly Ghilan stood up, hands held up, as if to push it back. But no. That was not her intention at all, whether it was knowingly or unknowingly. He looked up into Ghilan's mismatched eyes and saw – that ... her eyes, they were no longer the mismatched pair of ice blue and dark grey. They were both ice blue. Both held a calm and controlled sense in them. To him, if he did not know any better he would say she looked as if she were a Tranquil. There was ... nothing in those eyes anymore. They were cold.

Ghilan did not want to do it. She felt she had no choice. She had to buy them time. Everything was happening so fast and she was panicking. Ghilan recalled on how it felt and she willed whatever it was to come again.

It burned her. It hurt her inside so much. She felt as if she was in tremendous amounts pain. She cried out in agony as she unleashed a bolt of bright energy that had felt like a sense of burning coldness. It felt bright but the power was dark. She remembered the last time she felt like this. That struggle with Magister Adonis.

She released it, aiming for its mouth, but it ended up hitting the side of it's neck. The impacted patch had instantly burned, blackening. Severe frost bite. It caused the dragon to alter it's course as it panicked, crashing into a cabin a few paces away.

Ghilan, soon after, shook out from the trance like state, her eyes going back to her normal colour very subtly. She knelt down and continued helping Solas with the now passed out Adan.

Ghilan and Solas managed to carry him back to the Chantry as quick as they could, coming in with a few others. The healers took Adan from their arms and carried him off. Solas was about to address Ghilan about what just happened when Evie interrupted his movements.

"I will draw its attention, while you and the other's escape." Evie said as she tied up her long red hair into, a more practical, messy bun.

Cullen gave her a worried look. "Alright." He said.

"Nyx. Your group will go with Chancellor Roderick, Cole, and Cullen. Lead these people to safety and protect them. This is what you three do, is it not." Ghilan, Merrill, and Fenris nodded in confirmation. Evie then spoke, "Solas, Bull, Sera! With me! Let's get that dragons attention, shall we." She said as she got her bow ready.

They split up. When Evie's team got outside, they heard Sera shout, "Let's make some noise!"

The doors had closed behind her voice. Ghilan prayed they would make it out of there alive. Evie's plan was dangerous, ludicrous – but it had to work.

Ghilan's group had lead the survivors of Haven to safety, as they were asked. Now it was a matter of waiting and praying that the others would make it.

Ghilan looked around their rather large campsite. It was heart-breaking. People were bruised, battered, crying, moaning for people lost. She looked beside her and saw Fenris with his arms around Merrill, holding her close. Merrill had been shaken up.

It all happened so fast.

Someone had called out in the distance. Ghilan stood up and recognized the voice. She saw it was Sera, Bull, and Solas. Ghilan breathed a sigh of relief, but as they drew closer she took in their faces. Beaten, depressed.

Sera was the one to shatter the silence of their approach.

"She's gone."


	12. Chapter 12

**CH 12: As Real As You and Me ...**

 _ **-As Real As You and Me by Rihanna**_

Sera shouted curse after curse as she paced around one of the many campfires lit, kicking the occasional stray item that had managed to be in her path.

Bull, Sera, and Solas had managed to catch up to the rest of the survivors of Haven, however, The Herald, Evie, hadn't.

News spread around the camp and people became distraught at the loss of their Herald. Some believed, held onto the hope that Evie survived the massive avalanche that buried Haven. Others had doubt.

Sera was furious. Upset. She yelled and cursed Evie's name. Evelynn had been so insistent that they'd go without her. She punched at herself mentally, "I left my potentially best friend alone to face that stupid-face-Coryphenus-shite-faced- ..." Interrupting her own thought she let out a loud curse. Screaming it as loud as her lungs would let her. Cullen had come up to her and laid a gentle hand in Sera's shoulder. She startled. Sera looked to see who's hand it belonged to and she saw it was Cullen's. His eyes were heavy with emotion and understanding. But while Sera was giving into despair and lashing out, Cullen held onto hope - desperately.

Fenris, Merrill, and Ghilan were huddled around another campfire. She had closed her eyes and bowed her head, sitting solemnly and still. Fenris noticed and did the same, a hand resting in reassurance on Ghilan's knee while the other clasped Merrill's hand. Merrill had closed her eyes, head tilted towards the sky, muttering in Elven in small whispering breaths. They were praying that Evie was still alive, for her safe return. They prayed for the survivors and the ones lost. They prayed that they would, the Inquisition would be able to defeat this monster and heal the sky. They prayed. Merrill to the Elven gods and Fenris and Ghilan to the Maker.

Ghilan, deciding that she needed to be able to pray to someone, to believe someone could hear her troubles and provide a sense of peace and protection, decided to pray to the Maker. She felt more comfortable in doing so knowing that she wasn't the only elf to do so. She occasionally spotted Fenris praying, whispering prayers to the Maker as she would relieve him of his watch.

Solas was wandering about, helping anyone that needed a hand or healing. His gaze fell of Ghilan and his memory sparked. He wanted to ask her about what had happened when they were saving Adan and Minaeve. He remembered the unordinary power she used ... just as well as he remembered how he had noticed how the burns she had so carelessly given herself. He made his way towards her. They greeted him with a nod as he sat himself by Ghilan. He abruptly turned, facing her with his hands held out and palms up.

She gave him a puzzled look.

He simply said, "Your hands Lethallan."

"Oh, alright then." She said.

"Nyx? What happened to your hands!" Merrill hadn't noticed them, no one really did, until now. Ghilan's hands were burned. Her palms were an angry red and blustering. Some had already popped.

"We –" Ghilan began but Solas had interjected.

"We came across Minaeve and Adan who were both trapped underneath burning logs. She had handled the logs carelessly." He explained, already at the task of healing her hands. Ghilan had relaxed immensely at feeling his magic. The burning sensation in her hands was soothed.

"Mmm. Solas. Thank you so much. You are a blessing." Ghilan commented with eyes closed in comfort.

"Please be more careful Ghilan." Solas said quietly while turning her hands over, inspecting them for any other signs of damage.

"Mmhmm." Was all that he got as a reply.

She honestly looked like she was about to doze off right there, but he needed to ask her – privately.

"Nyx, if you and your friends wouldn't mind, I would like to ask you something. In private."

Fenris was looking back and forth between the two and he looks as if he was going to object, but Merrill placed her hand on his arm and spoke first.

"Of course not." She turned her head towards Fenris.

"Fenris, let's go to sleep. It's been a very – eventful day and I'm – I'm just so tired. May we, please?"

Fenris recalled on their part on the fight. Merrill had been forced to use her blood magic at one point to save a young soldier from a group of those monsters. When the soldier had seen what she had done, he realized what manner of mage she is – was. He ran yelling abomination, blood mage, malificar. She was not really handling it that well. Merrill is trying. She has been trying to wean herself off of depending on blood magic. Fenris didn't like blood magic, especially at the cost of her having to harm herself in any way. She only used it as a last resort.

Fenris nodded. "Alright." He stood, offering his hand to Merrill which she took gratefully.

Solas stood. "May we walk?" He asked holding out a hand to her.

" _As you wish._ " Ghilan replied in Elven, accepting his assistance. She glanced at their joined hands for a second. She rather liked the sight and the feeling of her hand in his. She couldn't explain why, but it just felt – right. "No.", she thought, "This isn't the time."

As they walked and drifted a little farther from the others of the camp, they began to speak in Elven using low voices.

"Ghilan. _What happened with that dragon? How did you manage to do that?"_ They had stopped walking.

" _I don't exactly know. I was recalling on a feeling I got when I had last accidentally cast a spell without knowing what I was doing. I just knew what I felt. It was the same feeling I got the time when – the – it was a long time ago."_ She caught herself. She didn't want anyone to find out what happened that night with Magister Adonis. She was ashamed. That night left her feeling dirtier than when she had first awoken from Uthenera.

Solas had noticed the stumble. Respecting her wishes, he did not bring it up. Instead he asked, " _What were you feeling_?"

" _I remember the sensation of cold, so cold that it burned. It was burning me inside. It felt as if it was so bright and ... righteous? But it felt so dark though. Ah, it's still difficult to explain."_

Solas merely nodded his head, extremely engrossed in her mysterious power.

" _Well. You most certainly are powerful. Such raw, magnificent talent."_ He mused. " _You are a mystery,_ Ghilan."

" _So it seems._ " She replied. " _Let's head back then if that was all."_

" _It was. Thank you."_

" _No, thank you."_ She said moving the digits on her hand in emphasis. "And Solas."

"Yes?"

"I'm glad that you – and the others returned."

"As am I."

"I only pray Evie survived."

"You pray? Are you religious?"

"I – yes ..."

"May I ask what do you believe in?"

" _Don't take any offense, Fen, but I pray to the_ Maker. _The Elven Gods,"_ Ghilan gestured quotations, " _in which the Dalish pray to are not Gods. I feel it would be wrong of me to pray to them. I believe in the Maker because ... because I need to. I need to believe there is something greater. How can we look around us; at the people, nature – the beauty of the world and not think that something greater had a hand in shaping all of it. It ... it gives me strength, peace, ... hope."_

Solas chuckled.

"What?"

"You are very passionate about you faith."

" _Yes. Well, when you're a to be slave, living that kind of life, that is all you have. You need to have faith – hope."_

"I am sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I find your passion endearing, comforting actually. It is welcoming to see you care so deeply."

"Oh. Thank you." Ghilan said, caught off guard.

"Do you believe in ... anything? _I mean you are – to others – supposedly a god; but we know that's not true. So do you?_ "

Solas was thoughtful for a moment, weighing his words. "I think that the idea of the Maker is a noble one. However, I have knowledge and wisdom. I am not particularly religious, no."

"Oh." Ghilan said a little disappointed, but not surprised.

"Are you going to try and convert me?" Solas teased with a playful smirk on his face.

"Maybe." She replied back in the same manner.

They spotted a figure moving in the distance.

"It's her!" Cullen cried out.

Ghilan was beside the Herald's cot. Evie was waking up.

"Why, hello there. It is good to see you have re-joined the living Evie." Ghilan said light-heartedly.

"Uhh. Are you sure? My head is killing me. Don't be surprised if you find me dead later because of it." Evie jested ... terribly.

"That ... that isn't actually that funny. At least not considering the circumstances."

Evie sighed. "I know." Her eyes were looking up at the celling of the tent. They were full of grief, her face grim. Evie was stripped out of her snow soaked clothing, redressed in warmer ones, and then swaddled in blankets. She was pale, almost blue. Thankfully though, colour had begun to spot on her skin. Hews of pink. "A good sign." Ghilan thought.

"Herald? Oh, I didn't mean to interrupt." Mother Giselle came into the tent and took a seat on the cot across from Evie. "May I speak with you?"

Evie looked towards Ghilan who merely shook her head, smiled and left.

"No. Not at all Mother Giselle."

After the song that spread throughout the camp had ended, Solas had gone up to Evie and explained to her that the orb Corypheus has is of Elven origin. Grateful that Ghilan isn't present to manage to put the pieces together. That the orb belongs to him. Solas told Evie of a fortress, his old fortress (he didn't tell her it was his mind you. Of course he wouldn't), Skyhold. It was a perfect place for this Inquisition to build an army. To grow.

And he was very certain that Ghilan would remember it.

They left at dawn.


	13. Chapter 13

**** I will be out of the city again for at least a week and I might be without internet so ... there might not be an update untl I'm back. And I am also starting classes in September. Getting ready to start up my own small bakery! :P ... So that might also affect on how fast I can update the story. Sorry. But I won't put it off for lengthy times a part, or at least I'll try not to. I do want to get this story on this site. It's all written out by hand after all. Im not gonna let that go to waste. :P :)**

 **Anyway ... carry on.**

 **CH 13: Blank Page ...**

 _ **Blank Page by Christina Aguilera**_

It was all rather spectacular, seeing Evelynn Trevelyn titled as the leader of the Inquisition. Their Inquisitor.

"Oh my goodness! Creators! Look at this place!" Merrill exclaimed. "It's magnificent! Let's explore it!" Merrill requested enthusiastically.

"Merrill, we should set up our tent first. Besides, this fortress is falling apart. It looks unstable. It would be dangerous at this time" Fenris said.

"Oh alright Fenris." Merrill said with a disappointed sigh.

She turned, though she noticed that Ghilan hadn't said anything since they crossed the bridge to Skyhold. She looked very confused, lost in contemplation.

"Nyx, are you not going to set up your tent as well?" Merrill asked.

"Huh? ... Oh, um, yes I will ... in a bit. I just ... need to, ah, check on something..." Her voice grew quieter as she walked away slowly, an arm in the air waving goodbye for the moment.

"Umm. Okay then." Merrill looked to Fenris as they both gave each other the look of 'what-the-heck-was-that-about'. They shrugged it off. Ghilan was able to handle herself in most situations. And besides, she's surrounded by numerous soldiers, mages, and rogues all working for the Inquisition. Fenris felt that she would be safe here.

" _This place ..."_ Ghilan thought to herself as she walked around.

She knew this place. " _It's – it's his, isn't it? No, that's ridiculous. But it feels like – could it be?"_ Her thoughts clouded her mind. People eyed her a little warily when she passed them, muttering to herself in a tongue that very few knew.

Solas had spotted Ghilan standing on top of the battlements looking over the bridge they had crossed to come inside the fortress' walls.

He smiled knowingly. " _You recognize it, do you not?"_

Ghilan felt his question tingle her ear. She had a feeling he was smiling. She turned around and sure enough, he was.

" _This is – is where we ..._ "

" _First met, yes._ " Solas finished for her. " _I believe we were just at the entrance before the bridge if I recall._ "

Her memory came back to her a bit clearer and she smiled a small smile. " _Yes. I remember_." She took in the fortress now that the confusion had gone. "It's amazing really. That this, even now, is still standing."

Solas quirked an eyebrow as she had gestured to the half destroyed castle.

" _Well, more or less_." She added and he chucked.

" _Yes it is. My people had been taking care of it for me over the years. Though, it is vacant now._ "

She hummed contently. " _It is beautiful here_."

They stood like that, side by side overlooking the bridge. Solas glanced at her. He could see from her expression, her eyes, and tell by the way she held a steady gaze ahead, fists slightly clenching, that she was thinking about the day she and that merchant left Arlathan.

"Ghilan _,_ " he began, "I _heard what Andruil had done. She made it a public spectacle, as an example to others. I – I am truly sorry_ Ghilan _about your parents._ "

She hadn't moved or even acknowledged his condolences. The only way he knew she had heard him was the slight change of the appearance of her eyes. They were distant, lost in a memory seconds before. Now ... now they were hard, angry, and cold.

Ghilan turned to leave him there. Deciding that she was hungry and that she will in fact set up her tent. She wanted to just lay down and go to sleep. Before she left though she paused in her tracks to address Solas. Her voice thick with bitterness, " _Fen Harel, whatever you did to the Evanuris, especially Andruil, they deserved it._ "

And with that she left. Solas still standing there looking up to the Breach, a hand touching the pendant he wore around his neck. His eyes grew heavy with guilt.

" _Ghilan, you would hate me just as well for what I had intended and still intend to do._ " He breathed out. The only ears around to hear his confession being his own. With sigh he left as well, wanting nothing more than to just go to sleep.

Solas had awoke from a fascinating dream. One he shared with their now Inquisitor, Evie. He thought it remarkable she was able to meet him in the fade, even without her being a mage.

Ghilan had awoken a tad bitter this morning. Mostly due to the fact that she had unpleasant dreams that replicated her memories, mostly likely drawn from Solas bringing up her parents.

She knew it was wrong, but she felt angry. Ghilan was worried that if she saw him while she felt this way, that she would take her anger out on him. He didn't deserve that. All he did the other day was give his condolences. It showed that he cared. She didn't want to be angry with him for that, but if she was being honest, she felt guilty that she did a little. So, she was avoiding him.

She got dressed in her white elbow high sleeved, low cut blouse in which a black leather corset hugged her middle. She put on her brown leather leggings that went a little passed he knees, and she wrapped her feet in black coloured cloth foot wraps. She wasn't planning on fighting off anything or going on missions. She basically had the day to herself she presumed. Merrill and Fenris had asked Ghilan if she would like to join them in meeting up with Varric in the tavern for few hours. She had declined. Ghilan had wanted to explore the grounds ever since they had arrived. It truly was a magnificent place. She felt a small tug of regret at not accepting Fen Harel's – Solas' offer back then. It was a small fleeting notion that carried no weight. If she would do it over again however, she would've chosen to stay with her parents. But she wouldn't dishonour their sacrifice by thinking like that.

The castle surely was falling apart. Oh, but how these halls must've looked before. No doubt that they were grand. They even had a garden. Though the plants were dead and wilted, she saw it's potential if cared for. She had also come across a library hidden away in the basement. Granted that it was so dusty that it was difficult to breathe, she planned that it would be her mission to clean it up. She had come back up from the lower floor to be back outside. Ghilan continued on, passing through the stables and greeting Blackwall, then making her way up another flight of stairs. She opened the door to find herself in a kitchen. "Fantastic." She thought. She made her way out of the kitchens and continuing up the stairs until she had come across another library.

" _Oh wow. He must've really liked reading._ " Ghilan muttered to herself, smiling. Something they have in common actually.

Ghilan made her way down the spiral staircase into a round room. The Rotunda. The walls were bare, but there was a desk in the centre of the room with some supplies on it. Ghilan walked up to the desk and noticed some paints laid out. Ghilan took a finger to the board with the paints on it and sure enough, it was still wet. "Curious," she thought, "was someone painting?"

Ghilan looked up and saw a cluster of bird cages dangling above the Rotunda.

"Well, that would be messy." She thought to herself as she imagined how they had dealt with the bird droppings ... dropping. Eww.

"Exploring, are we?" Solas said with amusement as he re-entered the Rotunda.

"Ah!" she jumped, "Solas! You sacred me!" She turned to face him.

Right now she was thankful that she could blame the scared reaction she had to be the cause of her now very red face. It was most certainly not because of the man standing before her.

Solas was shirtless, with only his necklace dangling against his bare chest. On that note, she could see that it was indeed a very nice chest. Lean and slightly sculpted. She was very thankful he was still wearing his pants. How would she explain it if she were to faint?

She mentally hit herself. She was oogling him for Maker's sake! She managed to force her eyes away from his well formed chest, towards his face. Her eyes then fell towards his hand in which he was carrying brushes and a bucket of water.

"Oh Solas, you paint?" She asked putting two and two together.

"Yes. It has been a hobby of mine for sometime. It ... relaxed me and I find it rather enjoyable." He smiled at her. A bit timidly she had noticed. Neither of them had moved yet. She noticed Solas' smile falter a bit. Then she remembered that she had been trying to avoid him. She had left him on the battlements, being completely rude. Ghilan felt so guilty for how she acted.

"Solas, I'm sorry."

His eyebrows shot up and his eyes widened. He moved to place his items down on his desk. "Ghilan, what are you apologizing for?"

"For yesterday. You gave your sympathies toward my parents and I just ignored it, I walked away and left you there. It was very rude of me and I am terribly sorry."

"No, Ghilan." Solas began as he stepped closer towards her. "I should not have brought it up. You were clearly upset when you recognized what this place is and I had just made it worse."

"No, Solas. You were being caring and I was being cold." She tilted her head down, ashamed. "I had actually been trying to avoid you, Solas. For today at least."

"May I ask why?" He was a bit concerned.

"I was angry at the time and I felt the reason why was because of you. But even though I knew it was wrong and that it wasn't your fault, I didn't want to lash my anger out on you when we were to eventually cross paths. I wanted to calm myself down first."

Solas took a few more steps closer. Almost chest to chest but not quite. He readjusted her head, lifting it up so her mismatched eyes met his.

"Ghilan, you don't have to apologize. But please, you do not have to avoid me, or others when you are upset."

She was about to interject when he continued over her voice. "I could teach you other meditations that would help you to relax."

Ghilan rolled her eyes at him. "Of course you would have ways to teach me more things." She said a bit sarcastically, jokingly and he chuckled.

"I could teach you a great many things, Ghilan, if you would be willing to learn. Painting for example." He stepped back to move towards his desk as she followed him.

"Oh no. I am afraid I cannot paint. At all. I'm no artist."

He laughed. "Alright then." Solas picked up his brush, paints, and pail and moved to a section of the wall to begin.

Hesitantly she asked, "May I watch you paint though?"

He turned back to look at her and smiled. "Of course." He gestured with his free hand for her to sit at the chair by his desk.

They both felt content in each others presence, needing no words spoken any further between them.

Ghilan realized that watching Solas paint was very calming.


	14. Chapter 14

**** Hi sorry for the wait! Back in the city, last day of vacation is tomorrow, started school, and I'll be going back to work Friday.**

 **I m not too sure if I portrayed the characters well enough in this one but ih well.**

 **And later on I'll be naming another chapter 'Mirror' as well. Two chapters from now, they kinda go together. Originally this was to be longer but I cut it in half. ******

 **... please continue *bows for you to enter* :P**

 **C** **H 14:** **Mirror ...**

 _ **Mirror by Kat Dahlia**_

It has been a month already since Ghilan, Fenris, and Merrill joined the Inquisition's forces.

Ghilan's group received weekly reports on their 'organization'. It took longer, but Ghilan was able to relay and receive information with her other cells. And with the Inquisition's support she, reluctantly, gave in and admitted that they were doing exceptionally well since joining, as their numbers of ex-slaves smuggled out and freed was higher than it used to be. The amount of times caught or close calls was still about the same as before. Thankfully, anytime that they were caught, they managed to escape leaving less and less casualties. That was something she felt that needed improvement though, as she wanted none. However, she knew this was unlikely.

Most of the Inquisitor's companions and advisors knew who Ghilan's group was by now. They mainly worked with Leliana as informants and spies, but sometimes they were called to assist Cullen's soldiers when needed. Fenris had become especially popular with them. Though some had issues with an elf being in their ranks, but little voiced it.

Besides, no one wants an angry Fenris.

On rare occasions Ghilan, Merrill, or Fenris, or all of them, were asked to accompany Evie when either of her companions were unavailable. Plus, Ghilan's group had unique talents that Evie would sometimes require.

Ghilan's training with her magic and her skills in that area raised exceptionally higher. Solas had theorized that it must be because of their location. He stated that since the Veil is weaker at Skyhold than it was at Haven, it would be much easier for her to connect with the Fade, and with that her magic as well. Not to say that Ghilan hadn't been improving well on her own, it's just that the weakened Veil seemed to give Ghilan more of an advantage. She felt her magic more clearly now. She felt it as a rush of cold. Like plunging into ice cold water. It also gives her less pain now that she is able to have more control over it. However, she is still learning the basics of casting, but at the rate she has been improving Solas had told her she could soon be well above average, not taking into account her talent though. Ghilan is powerful, has such raw magic in her, but it is the ability to control it is what she needs in order to truly be able to master her gift.

By now, almost everyone found out that she is a mage as well as a very skilled rogue. She trained almost everyday with Solas and learning to adjust herself into consuming lyrium, which she most desperately needed. On the days in which Solas was away with Evie, Ghilan would train with Fenris and Merrill. Even Dorian stepped in to give her a few pointers. Ghilan found that she rather enjoyed Dorian's teachings and company. She even found him attractive in his own way. It's too bad for her that he went for the other side.

Currently, Ghilan was training with Dorian in some sort of technique he uses that he knows Solas had noted his dislike of. Disregarding Solas' dislikes though, Ghilan very much likes Dorian's technique better. It felt easier.

"Dorian, how did you get so smart?" Ghilan asked teasingly, praising his techniques.

"Careful breeding my dear." Dorian said in mocked seriousness. "Although, you don't need to use my style Ghilan. I just thought you should know that there are far better ways, more simpler ways, even, in casting. I know Solas has shown you his, however, though he would never admit it, it has some flaws. Once you get the hang of your abilities my dear you will be able to find ways that suite yourself better."

"Honestly Dorian, I never thought of doing it the way you've shown me." She put her hand against her mouth and whispered, "Don't tell him, but I like your way better." Ghilan smiled, laughing a little. When she's with Dorian, he makes her feel like she doesn't need to take everything so seriously.

Dorian smiled brightly and replied back, "I won't." He noticed that someone had happened upon them and stood a few feet away from them, behind Ghilan. Looking a bit annoyed. "However, I believe he will find out eventually." He said pointing a subtle finger towards what was behind her.

Ghilan blushed, following Dorian's pointing finger to where Solas and, now Evie stood. Solas' face held a look of annoyance.

"Ah, well he obviously heard that..." Ghilan mentally face palmed herself.

"Solas, Evie! Welcome back!" Ghilan said enthusiastically.

"If you are done playing around Nyx, Miss. Trevelyn would require a moment of your time."

Ghilan's face showed her surprised but she nodded respectfully. "Oh wow. Ouch. He's clearly mad." She thought as she looked to Dorian who was smiling despite the irritation that was clear in his eyes at Solas' comment about how they were training.

Evie coughed awkwardly and spoke wanting to ease the tension. "Well, it seems I have to go to the Winter Palace on a pretty big mission involving Empress Celene. Nyx, I'd greatly appreciate if you, Fenris, and Merrill were there to accompany myself, Sera, Solas, and Dorian.

Ghilan's was stunned. That ... that is a huge event. She heard about the 'peace talks' from Varric. Apparently the Empress of Orlais is in danger. The other reason as to why she is still speechless is because she hadn't been to a party since – since Adonis.

Dorian saw her hesitation. "Nyx are you alright?"

It took a moment, but Ghilan managed to shake herself off of the initial shock. Clearing her throat she answered. "Yes, I'm fine. And yes Evie. We will be happy to assist you." She smiled her most decent fake smile that she could muster.

"Oh, thank you so much! Your skills will be of much use in this. I will give you all the details tomorrow. We have two days to prepare. I am sorry if this is short notice for you. I just had to make sure I had most of the other stuff prepared."

"Alright then." Ghilan replied. Smiling broadly, Evie took off, happy with the outcome. Probably on her way to see Cullen. Ghilan has been noticing how they have been becoming increasingly close lately.

Speaking of Cullen, Fenris should be with him and his soldiers right now. She decided she'd let him and Merrill, who was most likely with Varric, know.

Before she left though she noticed Solas had disappeared as well, leaving herself and Dorian alone. She figured he must be really upset about what she had confessed to Dorian. Though, she saw no reason for him to be. She still valued his teachings as well.

"Nyx, are you positive that you're alright? I mean you looked very pale a few moments ago."

"I will be alight Dorian. Don't worry."

He stared at her for a good measure and gave up, bidding her a good day for now. Little did Ghilan know that Dorian had been told by Elise what had happened at the last party she had Ghilan attend. Elise had told Dorian what had led to Ghilan's release as a precaution should he spot her. Elise had told him that if that were to happen, then he was to help her out. Elise had begged him as a friend in need of a favour. She trusted him immensely.

It was near evening, hours after Ghilan had gathered Merrill and Fenris and told them of what Evie had requested of them. Merrill seemed interested and Fenris – well he accepted it as well as was to be expected. Parties such as these aren't really his thing. Ghilan was nervous about the whole thing, but she made herself put on a brave face and suck it up. What happened was long ago and it isn't even the same party setting, it's in Orlais. It is not Tevinter. Besides, Ghilan had found that focusing on her curiosity held more potency than her fear.

It was starting to get late. Ghilan hadn't seen Solas since he came back with Evie. Usually he would come and join them for dinner. During which, Ghilan and Solas talked about their shared connection or Solas would chat along with Fenris and Merrill. Now the talks with Merrill were certainly entertaining to watch. Ghilan had to try as hard as she could not to laugh at Solas' expressions. It was simple to say that Merrill holds strongly to her beliefs.

So, being as late as it is, it was safe to say that Ghilan had become very concerned.

She excused herself from the table that was host to a competition of an arm wrestling match. Current opponent to beat is, of course, The Iron Bull.

The first place she looked was the Rotunda. Not there.

The second place was the library. Nope.

The third was the library below.

" _Where are you Solas_?" She spoke quietly to herself.

"He's not here." A male's voice had appeared in the room.

"H-Hello?" Ghilan called out.

"He hurts. He's angry, upset, grieving. He wanted to hurt them. Red, hot, burning, uncontrollable. Rage." As if snapping out of a trance the voice started to speak more clearly. "Solas left for a while. He is very upset."

Ghilan turned around and saw that it was Cole who was speaking. She had run into him a couple times before. Solas had to explain to her what he exactly was and what was it that he was capable of doing.

"He's angry? Cole, where is he? What do you mean he left? He's coming back right? What happened?"

"A friend of Solas' got hurt and it died. Now he grieves. It is strong. He loved it and now it's gone." Cole explained with sorrow in his voice.

"He's grieving." Ghilan parroted. Realizing why he acted the way he did today. "But Cole, where is he? He shouldn't be alone, especially if he's angry enough to want to hurt someone."

"But he wants to be. He thinks he should be. He thinks it is what he deserves. But ... he is afraid to be alone." Cole's face twisted into confusion. "He is afraid to be alone but he thinks he deserves it, he wants to be? I don't understand."

Ghilan's heart broke for Solas then. "No one deserves to be alone. Cole please tell me where he is."

"I-I-I don't know. He won't let me. He – he doe- oh! Wait! I feel him again! Just passed the bridge."

"Thank you Cole." Ghilan breathed a sigh of relief.

"I am glad I could help" Cole soon vanished and Ghilan took off running. She didn't stop until she ran across the bridge and came a few paces away.

By the time she had found Solas meditating underneath a tree, she was out of breath. To get his attention, she played dramatic.

Hands on her hips, she bent over gasping for breath. "Oh wow, I must be getting old!"

Solas jolted, startled out of his meditation. "Ghilan?" He spoke hoarsely. "What are you doing here?"

She looked at him. She had a smart mouthed retort ready to fire back, prepared for that question when it was to come. However, hearing him speak, seeing him like this. She couldn't bring herself to voice it. Her heart broke more at the sight of him. Baggy, red-rimmed eyes, slumped shoulders. She knelt before him, sympathy shown on her face.

"Solas, I am so sorry. I had gotten so worried when I hadn't seen you at dinner. I was looking all over for you. Then Cole appeared and told me where I could find you and – about what happened. Not details, only that you lost someone dear to you."

"Yes. My friend. It was a spirit of wisdom. I had known it for many years, it accompanied me many times as I journeyed through the fade. It gave me advice as I would often consult with it." His sorrowful eyes then turned angry and unforgiving. "Then some shemlen, idiots, summoned it against it's will, use it for what goes against what it is, changed it. Changed it into a demon of pride." Solas had clenched his fists hard, knuckles turning white. "I wanted to kill them. They did not deserve to just walk away free after what they did."

Ghilan placed her hands on top of his clenched fists. Solas sighed, easing up. " I left to ... calm down and came back here to meditate." He closed his eyes and began taking deep breaths.

" _I am very sorry for your loss_ Solas. I wish I had the honour of meeting it." Ghilan entwined her hands with his. He accepted it gratefully and held on to them, as if they – she was keeping him grounded. His breathing relaxed more and his grip loosened, but he still held her hands. Ghilan moved to sit beside him, shoulder to shoulder.

"You would have liked it as I'm sure Wisdom would've enjoyed your company a well." Solas commented quietly.

"Thank you for saying so Solas." Ghilan smiled gently at him and he smiled back.

Ghilan had nestled herself comfortably at his side, her head on his shoulder. Solas broke the silence, resting his head a top of hers. He chuckled a little. "You were worried about me?"

"Well, yes. You never came for dinner and I hadn't seen you even after that. I honestly thought you were mad at me for what you overheard what I said to Dorian."

"Ah, well I was a bit ... annoyed. However, it was more due to today's events."

"You mean that was the mission you came back from with Evie?"

Solas nodded a top her head. "Yes. I was asleep when I heard Wisdom's cry for help. I had asked Evie to accompany me."

"I would've gone with you as well if I'd known."

"I know. Thank you Ghilan."

She hummed in response. It was a still night, only the gentle rustle of the wind through the tree branches. Remembering what Cole had said, Solas thinking that he deserves to be alone, she lifted her head and he did the same noticing his shoulder had grown cold.

She looked at him softly in the eyes. "Cole told me something else Solas – Fen Harel." She looked him in the eyes and brought a hand up to cup his cheek so he wouldn't look away. She needed him to know, to understand. "You don't have to be alone. No one deserves that."

He was taken back, he flinched, but he was secured by her hand cradling his cheek and her mesmerizing eyes. He looked in her eyes with surprise. Shifting his focus from ice blue to dark grey as if he was searching for something. He seemed to have either found it or gave up as he closed his eyes and just breathed. He leaned forward, close to her face.

Ghilan's had become red as he did so. She wasn't sure what was happening, so she had shut her eyes and just waited.

Solas pressed his temple to her's and just breathed steadily. She risked opening her eyes and saw that he seemed to have relaxed. He was much calmer now than when she had found him.

" _Thank you_ Ghilan." He whispered.

They stayed like that for a good measure. Ghilan didn't want to spoil the moment, however her bottom demanded she get up.

Solas opened his eyes and stilled. Staring into he eyes again, shifting from one to the other. Looking for something. Ghilan figured she'd do the same, trying to gauge what he was thinking, what he was looking for in her eyes. She caught a quick passing of his eyes wandering to her lips and then back into her eyes. She blushed.

They were still so close with their foreheads pressed together. His eyes moved down again, watching as she slightly parted them. He looked back up. She saw it in his eyes. He looked lost, desperate for something to keep him grounded. To help him ease his pain. She would gladly help him, keep him level, guide him through the dark night that was his grief.

... But ... not like that. Not when he is like this; upset and grieving. It wouldn't be right. What he needs right now, even if he feels like he doesn't want it, is someone to just be here for him. A shoulder to cry on.

She would comfort him, but only as what he needs. A friend.

She saw Solas tilt his head slightly, slowly closing his eyes and parting his lips.

Oh how she very much wanted to – she couldn't.

"Solas, we – we should head back." Ghilan had inched backwards away from his face as Solas leaned back slightly from hers.

He searched her eyes again and she couldn't help that this whole thing had left her so red.

Which he noticed. Producing a small amused smile he spoke, " _As you wish_ Ghilan."

They stood and that was the moment Solas' stomach started to punish him.

"Ha! You're lucky I saved some food for you then Solas."

"Indeed. I am lucky to have you." He spoke proudly.

"Come on. Let's hurry up. Wolves prowl out here at this hour."

Now Solas felt obligated to say something to that. "Oh yes. I know of one in particular who has caught the sent of his prey."

"Well ... then he should be quick to catch it before it gets away." She was trying to ignore how the phrase could mean of what he was referring to ... and failing. Why did she have to blush so easily.

Solas chuckled, noticing her nervousness. He could tell she knew exactly as to what he was referring to. He was feeling up for a little bit of fun.

"Let's hurry up now Solas. It's probably gotten so cold by now." Ghilan said.

"Oh do not worry. I have ... other ways of warming it up." He certainly was feeling a little better. Playful even.

"Well good for you." She shot back and quickened her pace. Now she was red and ... well a little you know.

He noticed her flustered state and just laughed as he quickened his pace as well.

 ******* Small update here: Sorry the next chapter is taking a while. I may have taken too much on when I kept full time and three part time classes (two at home and one evening one at the school :/ ) So I adjusted my one day of work, where I actually go to the school and stay there until 10pm, to part time. I wanted to see how I handled it, but unfortunately I haven't been sleeping well and working a full shift and then going to evening classes left me soo drained I thought I was going to fall asleep in my first class for that course. I just can't seem to get a good enough sleep. I get at least 4 to 5 hours on a regular basis. The bad days I has been 3 to 4, on one really particular bad day it was 2 or 3.**

 **I'm not trying to make any excuses, I just felt like saying how tired I've been :P**

 **But I'm still gonna update this thing! I will not leave it incomplete. When I'm taking a break from school work or have a few minutes, I work on typing the chapters into the computer to be posted. I am currently working on the next one okay. ... I'm about half way done.**

 **And one more thing ... In relevance to one of the courses I'm taking (Small Business Plans), would any of you be willing to come to a bakery that specializing in tea and coffee infused baked goods. Like cakes, cookies, etc. that have flavours of tea or coffee integrated in them in some way.**

 **I just want to know if any of you might like that idea. :P**

 **I'm doing an assignment and I'm just curious if it might work... :P**

 **..Thank you guys for your time. I'll try to get the new chapter up when I can, I will try. ********


	15. Chapter 15

****Finally! ... i know right? :P Just caught up with work, school work, ... annnd :P this new game I started playing ... a phone app called Mystic Messenger. :P XP XD ... I really really like that game ..**

 **Again, sorry for the wait. I hope its worth it***

 **CH 15: Clear …**

 _ **Clear by NEEDTOBREATH**_

Ghilan awoke the next morning to find herself in the Rotunda, on Solas' couch, with a blanket around her, and a pounding headache.

She recalled the events of last night and remembered that she stayed with Solas while he ate and then they had shared a rather large bottle of wine. Solas had been drunkenly discussing the Fade with her. She was surprised the even though they drank the entire bottle, Solas had spoken as clear as day, ever intelligent, even though she well knew that he was about as drunk as she had been.

Ghilan wasn't clear on what happened after that, other than she had woken up here. She rose up and stretched as she made her attempt to get off the couch. However, a shooting pain in her temple made her attempt a failure. She was clutching her head when Solas strode in the room carrying cups of hot liquid with steam arising out of it.

"Tea.", he simply announced seeing her questioning look.

"How are you this morning Ghilan? Sleep well?" He smirked lightly sipping on his cup, even though he hated the stuff, while handing the other to her. She took it and sipped at it greedily.

"My head is killing me, but other than that I'm fine. I actual slept rather well."

"I am glad to hear that., since it was a bit cramped with the two of us."

She paused and looked up at him in a sharp movement that had her wincing.

He chuckled, "We fell asleep beside each other." Solas cleared the situation up. "Though if this becomes a habit, I may need to get a bigger couch."

She laughed, and then cringed when another shot of pain made its way to her skull. Solas noticed her reaction and set his and her tea down on the near by stand.

"Allow me." He came closer and sat beside her. He took his hands and gently messaged her temple and sides of her head with his fingers while pouring healing magic into his touch.

"Mm mm, much, much better." She sighed in relief.

"I'm glad to be of assistance." He said smiling as he brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"Thank you Solas."

"No, thank you Ghilan, for last night and for keeping me company."

"How are you feeling Solas?" She asked as she reached for her tea and his own now that he had gotten rid of her headache. She sipped hers while he took his from he offering hand and just held it.

"It hurts." He confided, "It always does, but I will survive."

Ghilan looked at him and felt the need to remind him, "The next time you need to mourn Solas, you don't need to be alone."

He looked down at his cup, contemplating.

"It's been so long since I could trust someone."

"I know the feeling." Ghilan shared.

He shook off his contemplation and gave her a small smile. "I'll work on it. Thank you again. Come now. Let us finish. I believe that the Inquisitor would like to speak with you and your group."

"OH! Fenhedis! What time of day is it!?"

Solas laughed, "A couple hours to noon, I believe."

"I'm late!" Ghilan placed a hand on her temple, shaking her head.

"Do not worry. I talked with the Inquisitor and she was forgiving." Solas reassured her, taking her hand off her temple and holding it in his, his thumb caressing the back of her hand.

"Finish up and then I will take you to her."

"Elganar! Nyx, there you are!" Merrill exclaimed.

"Finally! Where have you been Nyx? We were worried, we wen to check up on you after you had left but you weren't in your room all evening." Fenris crossed his arms. He seemed pretty upset, but Ghilan knew it was because he cared. To her, Fenris felt like the big brother she never had.

"Nyx was with me last night." Solas said "She kept me company in my grieving state."

"… All night?" Merrill asked, a coy look in her eyes forming.

"Yes, Merrill. All night." Ghilan rolled her eyes. "But it's not what you think, all we did was drink, talk, and fall asleep."

"… Sleep … together?" Merrill prodded, smiling like a cat.

"Merrill!" Ghilan was flustered and Solas just stood there amused.

Fenris turned to Merrill, "Merrill," he said with a straight face, except for a raised eyebrow, "you're spending too much time with Varric. You are beginning to sound like him."

"Yes! That Varric is a bad influence!" Ghilan agreed strongly.

"Oh, no he isn't. He's been rather helpful, teaching me knew things."

"Oh, Merrill." Fenris sighed. "That dwarf has corrupted you." He muttered.

"Oh, it wasn't just him. Isabela taught me some things as well." Merrill added, smiling sweetly at Fenris while he just stared, deadpanned.

"No wonder …"

Meanwhile, Evie had come in and stood beside Solas, watching the little scene. She caught Solas' amused look and smiled herself. "I seen its been an eventful morning."

"Indeed it has." Solas replied.

"How are you feeling Solas?"

"Better, calmer at least, thanks to Nyx. It does still hurt, but my friend is now gone and I must endure. I will survive Inquisitor."

"I am sorry Solas, for your loss."

"Thank you. And thank you for accompanying me, Evie. I appreciated it."

Evie smiled at that and patted his arm. Despite their differentiating views on some topics, they held a great respect for one another.

"All right!" Evie interrupted the bickering three. "Everyone else has been debriefed but you three, as you were the last additions. Lelianna had told me of your skills at espionage regarding the last few missions you three dealt with for her, and we though it would be wise to bring you three along as well. You will probably hate this but we need you three to go undercover … as servants."

Both Fenris and Ghilan tensed, a hard look to their face.

"Is that necessary?" Ghilan ground out.

"I am sorry, but it is. We need to have hidden eyes where we can. There's a rumour that a Tevinter assassin will be at the Winter Palace tomorrow. There to assassinate Empress Celene, and we cannot have that. We need to find out who the assassin is and stop them." Evie sighed, ruffling her lengthy red hair and then crossing her arms. "Then we need to figure out who we should support for leadership of Orlais. Duke Gaspard wants to have Celene overthrown so he can reclaim his, quote-unquote, birthright. Celene apparently just wants peace for Orlais. And then there's Briala."

"Who is Briala?" Ghilan asked curiously.

"She is the, quote-unquote again, Elven Ambassador, and by heard rumor is Celene's ex-lover. Briala appears to show resentment towards Celene. Especially for what happened to one of the alienages in Orlais. For that, Briala would also like to see Celene step down. It was said that Briala intends to better the lives of the elves in the alienages, which is her ultimate goal in this." Evie took a deep breath, clearly stressed out by this mission. "This whole thing will be rather ... fickle. This will require careful handling. And from what I've heard from Lelianna, you three are practically experts with that. So you see why we need you, do you not?"

Ghilan sighed, "Yes, we understand Evie."

"Thank you." Evie's tired eyes eased up. Ghilan had just noticed how pale and tired Evie looked. There was even a slight hint of bags under her eyes.

"Josephine and Vivienne have been working together to put together everyone's attire for the evening, including the three of you."

Evie reached on the near table and handed each of them a bundle of clothing. "Please try them on if you will, and let Josephine and Vivienne if there any adjustments to be made."

"You three are to be disguised as servants at the Winter Palace. Any information you pick up you can relay to either myself, Cullen, Josephine, and Lelianna. Sera, Dorian, and Solas will be there as well. If you feel like you have a lead on the Assassin and have no time to report back, please feel free to follow your lead. I will trust all of your judgements."

"What will Sera, Dorian, and Solas be doing there?" Merrill asked.

It was Solas who answered, "We will be doing the same, however we will be seen as guests along with the Inquisitor."

"Yes. Most people know that they are in relation to the Inquisition, but most don't know of you three working with us as well. We can use that to our advantage."

"I am assuming we can't just stroll in with you then." Fenris spoke.

"That's right. Lilianna's scouts will have scoped out an entrance point for you to easily slip in the palace without any on noticing or having much suspicion. So when the time comes for us to depart, you three will be lead by our spies to the entrance. They will make sure it will be clear for you." Evie took a deep breath with a firm nod, "Any other questions?"

"I think you've covered the main point Evie." Solas said.

"All right then. So tomorrow evening we will depart. Any further questions, feel free to ask."

They had made it inside the palace with little difficulty. It had been at least an hour after they arrived. The only entertainment this evening, Ghilan had felt was significant enough, was Sera's prank. She had to keep from bursting out laughing when she heard it, trying to not spill the tray of little cakes as her shoulders had shook.

Ghilan was making her way to the gardens when she spotted Solas leaning against a statue. She decided to check in with him, walking up to him and giving a slight bow of her head, offering the tray of cakes as she spoke, "Have you seen anything yet?"

"No. I'm afraid I do not have the look as one of the servants, so the elves are reluctant to speak with me. How about you?" He asked taking in her servants clothing while reaching for a cake.

"I've talked to a couple of them. The elves I've spoken to seem like they know nothing, but I hear others whispering that there is a drop off of some sort. I hear them mention Briala quietly." Ghilan watched as Solas took another cake. She couldn't have decided if he was just making up a reason for others who see her for her to still be there, standing by him or if he just genuinely liked the small cakes.

Ghilan grew a little curious as she watched Solas lick his fingers free of the powdered sugar and chocolate. He seemed almost comfortable here.

"How do you like it here so far?" Solas asked her.

"To be honest, I don't. Too many – ", she caught herself, "it just brings back too many memories."

"Oh? Of what?"

"N-never mind. How about you? Are you enjoying yourself?" She rebounded his curiosity.

"Hmm. I do adore the heavy blend of power, intrigue, and sex that permeates these events. I find that I rather miss them?"

"You do?" She asked surprised.

"Why yes." He chuckled a little. "I happened to be quite the trouble maker back then during these. I found them very entertaining."

Ghilan laughed a little, smiling at that Solas seemed to be enjoying himself here.

"Well, I should get back to it before people start getting suspicious … or angry that I haven't brought any cakes to them."

"Ha, indeed. Happy hunting Nyx."

Just as Solas bid her away, a woman with an elven companion turned her head in their direction upon hearing the name that Solas spoke. Her eyes on Ghilan.

"Nyx!?" The women called out.

Nyx had stilled. She knew that voice. She looked to the corner of her eye and saw Solas looking back and forth, from herself to the women who called out to her. Judging by Solas' eye movements, the women was coming closer. She heard the women's heels clatter on the hard floor and the faint soft padding of bare feet. Ghilan didn't move at all. It was only when she felt a hand on her shoulder that she turned around.

"Miss..." Was all Ghilan got out before she was dragged into a hug. Her small tray of cakes clattering to the floor.

So much for subtlety.

Solas was watching the scene with great curiosity as they carried on conversing in front of him.

"Miss – uh – Elise, Arno! What are you doing here?"

"We could ask the same of you girl. You're working here? In the palace, as a servant?" Elise asked with slight disappointment.

"I – I am, Miss. I'm sorry. It's just I had found it difficult to get a decent job anywhere involving any different line of work" Ghilan lied.

"So you're a servant?"

"Yes Miss."

"Oh, stop with the "Miss"." Elise waved her hand annoyed.

"But Nyx you have so much potential. You're a smart, strong woman, and a quick learner." Arno interjected. "Surely you could have found a different line of work."

Ghilan chuckled. "Arno, what other job is there that an elf – a female elf, be allowed to do besides this or slavery."

"But this isn't any different!" Arno insisted.

"Yes, it is."

Arno snorted. "Yeah, how so?"

"Because I had the choice." Ghilan shot back firmly. However, she did not miss the wince in Arno's eyes and Elise's eyes drop down.

"Please understand. I am grateful for what the both of you have done for me, but I am truly alright with this. Maybe, one day when elves are finally treated equally across Thedas, I would reconsider a career change." Ghilan smiled and laid a hand on Elise's shoulder. "But for now this will do."

Elise sighed, "Oh Nyx, alright. I just thought that after what happened with Ad – "Elise remembered that Solas was still standing within their little circle as they clearly forgot he was there. She had caught herself and quickly re-adjusted her words. "uh – with "him" after I gave you your freedom, that you would have chosen something farther from slavery."

"Thank you for your concern, both of you, but really I'll be fine."

"If you say so." Arno relented.

Solas decided to clear his throat, the situation was staring to feel awkward for him. However, it was Elise's attention that he drew, not Ghilan's. He was trying to hint at her that they needed to be alert. That they couldn't afford to be distracted for long.

"You're the one I heard calling out her name, right? Aren't you with the Inquisition?" Elise prodded.

"Yes. I did and yes, I am here with the Inquisition." Solas replied.

"How do you know our Nyx?" Elise had asked him and he saw Arno's eyes narrow at him.

Ghilan grew still, not sure how Solas planned to respond, or if that she should say something instead. She hesitated but she started to open her mouth, but before she could even get a squawk out, Solas had replied smoothly to her inquiry.

"I don't really know her. I just met her this evening. I saw a beautiful woman across the hall and I was interested in getting to know her." Solas even provided a shy smile as he said, "I had called her over for some of the cakes in hopes of being able to strike up a conversation with her."

Elise beamed and Arno rolled his eyes. Ghilan grew red, and it didn't help that Solas just kept staring at her, smiling. He seemed very amused at the moment.

"Oh so you were trying to woo our Nyx here?" Solas turned his attention to Elise as she spoke.

"If I may be as bold as to say so," focusing back on Ghilan, "Yes. I was."

Ghilan turned even redder, which solidified their lies with evidence. Elise was about to speak again but Ghilan interrupted her before she could get out whatever she was going to say.

"Elise, sorry for not asking this earlier, but how have you and Arno been?"

The couple smiled at each other and entwined their hands, as a result, Ghilan bore their infections grin.

"Very well." Arno answered.

"We decided to move to Orlais a few months ago. I couldn't stand to keep hiding our relationship in Tevinter, so we moved here and we got married. Mind you, it is still not looked fairly on here, but no one is going to kill us for it. And frankly, we don't give a damn anymore." Elise added.

Ghilan beamed and embraced them both.

"Oh! I'm so happy for you two!"

"Thank you Nyx." Arno smiled.

"Wait." Ghilan started, pulling back. "What about the others you had under your care?"

Elise smiled. "Arno had alerted me that someone had broken in one night and we both crept to the source and saw a couple of figures releasing them all."

Arno interjected and continued explaining, "I heard them whisper that they would get them to a safe place where they'll be free."

"We don't know who they were, but we are thankful hat whoever freed them from me made it easier for me to walk away from that life."

"Now if you will excuse me, I head Dorian Pavus is here as well. I would very much like to catch up with him. Goodbye Nyx."

"Goodbye Elise, Arno."

Ghilan was about to leave as well but stopped when Solas took hold of her arm.

"You didn't tell me you were a slave?"

She saw the amusement gone from his face, as if it were never there and replaced with concern.

"I - I said I was held in a magister's home, didn't I?" She recalled vaguely. She thought she had mentioned it to him.

"Yes, but not that you had been enslaved." Solas' look hardened.

"It's not important now."

"Nyx – "

"Solas, please. We have a job to do. I'll explain later if it will satisfy you." Ghilan hated how she felt right now. It just seemed that whenever her past was brought up either with Adonis or the one with Andruil, she would always seem to turn bitter and cold."

"Nyx, it's not for the sake of my satisfaction! Its because I – ", he sighed, his reasoning left him. "Very well then Nyx. If you prefer not to talk about it, I will not pester you further."

She winced as he said the word "pester". "I would prefer not to, at least not here and now. Maybe one day Solas. For now, let us return to our duties."

Solas nodded in response. Ghilan sighed and walked away.

Ghilan had made her way back to Lelianna about her findings. Apparently the Inquisitor had been following a trail as well. One that led her to discovering a women named Morrigan had taken out the Tevinter assassin. But there was still a missing piece. There was someone else, someone who was pulling all the strings. Someone here who wanted Celene dead.

Ghilan had investigated further. She, Merrill, and Fenris had to move within the party independently, as to not draw attention or arose suspicion. They peeked around and found notes and heard rumours regarding the Empress, Gaspard, and Briala. All important information she was sure, which she relayed back to Lelianna. However, there was nothing that pointed at to who was going to be behind the attack.

Ghilan was refilling her serving tray when Cullen approached her. Leaning against the wall head turned from her, he whispered so only she could hear.

"It's Florianne. Evie is about to make her move. Be ready."

Ghilan nodded and Cullen walked away. Nyx took her tray and walked slowly, gradually getting closer to where the Empress was standing.

She saw Evie approaching the Duchess.

"The eyes of every noble in the empire are upon us your grace, remember to smile." Evie egged on, "This is your party after all, you wouldn't want them to think you have lost control." Evie wagged her figure at Florianne, whose face was straining to contain her outburst.

"Who would not be delighted to speak with you Inquisitor." Florianne replied as sweetly as she could muster, trying to stay the innocent.

However, Evie was having none of that. She would accuse Florianne. What better way to do that than to do it publicly in front of everyone?

"I seem to recall you saying, "All I needed was to keep you out of the ballroom long enough to strike."" Evie quoted, her eyes hardening.

Gasps filled the room as the accusations Evie recited were backed up with the evidence they had found that led up to Florianne's conviction.

Florianne was still in denial, she huffed a laugh. "This is very entertaining Inquisitor, but you can't inquire that any one would believe your ridiculous stories."

A voice that hadn't been heard much this evening, though sounding lovely, had seemingly shook the entire room. "That would be for a judge to decide, cousin." The Empress of Orlais had spoken.

Florianne looked at her brother imploringly, but he turned form her ashamed. Florianne had lost. She was carried away by the palace guards and Inquisition soldiers.

Ghilan walked up to Cullen, who was standing near the scene as well, looking very proud. "I'm impressed Evie did that. No bloodshed required." Ghilan commented as they watched Celene, Briala, and Gaspard, along with the Inquisitor walk out of the room.

Cullen smirked as he watched Evie leave. "As am I. She is rather … strange that one."

"Well that was rather exciting wasn't it?" Merrill announced as she and Fenris approached Ghilan.

"I must admit; it was quite that." Ghilan agreed.

"Hopefully, now we can be done with this and change from these." Fenris gestured to the servants attire he was wearing. It was … rather fancy for his standards.

"Oh Fenris, but you look so handsome." Merrill complimented. Fenris blushed a little and then smiled at Merrill. Hearing the music start up again after the Empress had made her speech he asked Merrill to dance, which she eagerly accepted. Ghilan smiled at that. She turned around to see that just through the doors Evie had disappeared out of, she saw that she was dancing with Cullen happily.

Ghilan decided to just walk around for a bit of down time. She found Sera leaning on one of the tables, looking very uninterested.

"So, how did you think tonight turned out?" Ghilan asked, trying to strike up a conversation.

"Ha! I knew they were all lying. It was a good thing we were here, I'd say. Innit' right?"

"It did turn out rather well." Ghilan agreed.

She turned around, feeling a breeze come through, to see another set of open doors. She excused herself and decided to enjoy the night air. She wasn't really sure why exactly, but something about the night soothed her. It was stronger than what most people felt.

She walked out of the doors, surprised to see Solas leaning on the rails of the balcony, overlooking the people below.

Ghilan smiled at that, she came up behind him quietly, amused that she made him jump slightly as she laid a hand gently over his shoulder blade. He relaxed when he had realized it was just her. She noticed his gaze return downward to the people below.

Ghilan contemplated. "You look lost Solas. Unsure."

"Perhaps. Tonight has been rather interesting. I'm just not sure how to feel at the moment."

She followed his gaze downward and then looked back up to him and smiled. She took her two fingertips and gently lifted his chin up, bringing his gaze towards the stars as she spoke, "Maybe it is because you are keeping your eyes down, gazing at the others below who also look lost. Gauging their reactions. To clear your mind, look up – way from them, to the stars. They are meant to be the lights in the night sky. They are meant to guide you." She removed her hand and Solas looked to her to find her smiling at him.

"I don't think they are meant to be used as a guide in this case."

"No?" Ghilan asked. She stretched out her arms, settling them down on the rails as well, turning her eyes upward to the stars. "They work for me."

Solas watched her as she basked in the presence of the star lit sky. He heard the music still playing. He looked up at the stars and then focused on her again. He knew what it was that he felt in that moment.

"Dance with me?" He asked, fully facing her.

"What?" Ghilan asked, startled by the sudden request.

"Dance with me, before the band stops playing." Solas urged, holding out his hand for her to take. He felt as if he needed her to take his hand. He figured it would tell him something. About what Ghilan feels for him. If she would trust him.

"Oh Solas, I – I don't dance, and – "

"Please Ghilan." He asked patiently. The way he asked her, it felt like he was willing to wait no matter how long for her to take his hand. She looked him in the eyes. He asked her with such warmth and sincerity.

"Alright." She said softly, smiling as she let herself be led by him. The instant Solas' arms were around her, hands touching her, she melted in his embrace. He felt it. Smiling, he held her firmer to him. She looked back in his eyes as they danced together.

She let her head drop to his shoulder, comfortably.

Quietly she spoke, "I will tell you. I can't promise when, but I will."

He smiled, more at ease as they danced on.


	16. Chapter 16

****Author's Note: Hey! Sorry for the long wait. I'm still doing a class but I have a bit more room to breathe, so hopefully I can get back on track and update this thing a bit more often****

 **CH 16: Mirror (part 2)**

 _ **Mirror by Kat Dahlia**_

The trip back to Skyhold took about five days, so the group was rather relieved to be back. They had arrested Duchess Florianne and were bringing her along for Evie to judge.

Celene, Gaspard, and Briala now ruled Orlais unitedly. Most were relieved that they did not in fact have to allow Celene's death, or Gaspard's, or even Briala's. It was the best possible outcome, surely.

It was early evening when everyone had gotten settled in again. Most came to the tavern to celebrate, except for Leliana, Josephine, Cassandra, Vivienne, and Solas.

Varric had decided to start up a game of Wicked Grace, while Bull shared drinks with his group and was sharing stories with some of the Inquisition soldiers. To say the evening in the tavern was lively, would be an understatement. Everyone was laughing, smiling, and singing along to Maryden, the tavern bard.

"Nyx! I heard that you too, had run into Elise!" Dorian announced happily.

"Yes, I did. It was really good to see her and Arno again." Ghilan smiled.

Admittedly, everyone was a tad drunk tonight.

"Arno? You mean that broad, muscular elf she always has with her?"

"Yes. Did you know, Dorian, that they are actually married?"

"What!? I mean, she had mentioned they were together but she said nothing of marriage to me. I'm actually a bit hurt." Dorian replied with a pout, adding some coins to the ever growing pile.

Ghilan looked to her hand and then around the table at the others. Fenris looked determined to win this time. She added four silver and continued talking to Dorian over the other's chatter.

"Oh, I'm sorry Dorian. I had thought she would have. Maybe she was planning to later on." Ghilan offered.

"When did this happen?"

"She said a few months ago. She and Arno had moved from Tevinter to Orlais in order to elope."

"Oi! Merrill, it's your friggin turn ya!" Sera called out.

"Oh! I – I'm sorry. I am not very good at this game to be honest." Merrill admitted, adding some coins to the pot.

"Well, that was rather impressive," Dorian praised, "for Elise to do that. It must have taken a lot of guts for her to stand against the status quo from back home."

"Indeed. I am proud of her." Ghilan agreed.

"She must really love that Arno." Dorian mused.

"Oh she does." Ghilan replied, drawing another card from the pile.

"I think you are the one who had inspired her to follow her heart Dorian. She thinks highly of you."

"Well, my dear, she had told me that it was in fact you who had inspired her too as well. She is very grateful towards you."

"No. I am the one who should be grateful to her. She freed me." Ghilan recalled on the memory of that night.

"He guides her form her post, away from others. He needs help he tells her. We try to push the object, but soon later I feel him push his front into me. Thrusting himself against me. I turn, trying to push him away, panic rising, heart racing, but he is stronger. He pins my body between his and the large statue. He kisses me, rough, hard, angry. Tries to shove his tongue in my mouth, I bite down hard. He pushes me away and slaps me, I fall, fumbling, sideways. I turn, twisting, trying to get up fast enough. He's too fast. He's on top tearing at my clothes, about to enter. White, cold, so cold, but hot and burning, black. Light and dark. It burns. I have to let it out. I push my hands up against him, leaving blackened marks. He rises as he cries out in agony. He comes at me again. I stop him, spearing him through his heart. " _Halam sahlin, ma halam._ " Blood pools around him. They come. " _Ma Halani,_ help me!" I cry out. "Get up and run Nyx! We will clean this up, go run! I give you your freedom." She says. Just like before, parents crying for their daughter. Desperate voice announces, " _Ar lasa mala revas_ , Ghilan, our child," he wraps his arm around his wife, tears streaming down their faces, "we give you your freedom."

Ghilan is startled from the memory she had just relived by the sound of someone entering. Strange she thought. That she could hear that, even more so that the tavern seemed to be quieter. She turned around to see it was Solas who had entered. Ghilan was about to smile at him until she noticed his hardened face.

"Cole!" Solas says disapprovingly.

Ghilan hadn't seen Cole enter the tavern this evening. She turned around to face the group of people at the table to find everyone had gone quiet and all eyes were on her, with pitying looks. Merrill looks as if she will burst into tears while Fenris looks livid. Ghilan, for a moment, is thoroughly confused as to what just happened. Surely she had missed something.

"I'm sorry." She hears Cole speak, breaking the silent tension. "She has so much sorrow and pain and guilt. It is hurting her." Cole suddenly appears behind her chair.

"Cole." Solas speaks again.

"I know. I should have asked her first. I am sorry."

Ghilan was still. She put the pieces together and she paled. Her eyes shifted to the others around the table and understood their stares now. Her thoughts, her memories had just been announced out loud to everyone listening in the tavern. They know! They all know what happened now! Even Blackwall. Even he is staring art her with his mouth agape, horror in his eyes for what he has heard. She looked to Solas who held sorrow in his gaze. Varric, Sera, Cullen. They all know now! One of her darkest secrets. Most shameful. One she held to herself.

Ghilan got up from the table abruptly, holding back the tears with vengeance, and she ran.

Ghilan heard them calling out to her but she didn't stop. She thought herself foolish for thinking she was strong. For thinking that she had put what had happened behind her. For letting it affect her, still. She ran until she came near to the end of the bridge that led out of Skyhold. Ghilan had no plans of stopping. She started up again, taking steps toward the bridge but a hand shot out and gripped her wrist firmly. Holding her in place and it wasn't letting go. Ghilan turned to see it was Solas who gripped her. He must have Fade Stepped to reach her. She tried to wiggle her way out of his grasp but he wouldn't let go. His face grew hard, grief stricken. And the one she hated, pitying.

"Let me go." Ghilan said clear and firm.

"No." Solas rebutted.

"Let me go Solas. Now." Ghilan was starting to get irritated, angry. She tried to hold back her tears but they escaped her eyes.

"No Ghilan. I will not let you go." He stepped closer and pulled her to his chest.

"Stop – ", she was cut off by his embrace. His arms wrapped around her firmly supporting and comforting. But she wanted to be alone now, not comforted. She didn't need this.

"Let go of me Solas." She whispered, fighting a loosing battle against herself.

"No."

"Please."

" _Nae_ "

She gritted her teeth as she returned his embrace. Her hands gripped his back, as if she was hanging on for her life. Her tears freely flowing now. She couldn't hold it back. Ghilan wailed out in grief as she cried into his shoulder.

"Why?" She sobbed out.

"Because you need this. Because you are upset. Because you don't have to be alone." He spoke remembering her words from his time in grief.

Her sobbing eased, with quiet words she spoke, "But I want to be."

He stilled at that. His heart had dropped, sinking into the pit of his stomach at those words.

He suspected it already, this feeling. He had tried to ignore it, but each day he spent getting to know her it grew more difficult. He knew what he felt, but he wasn't ready to admit it out loud yet. So for now his reply to that was, "I don't want you to be."

They stayed like that for a while. Ghilan's tears had ceased, her mismatched eyes rimmed with red, her tanned skin on her face now blotchy with red.

Ghilan pulled back to look at him and her reluctantly loosened his grip. Her gaze held no warmth, just coldness, numbness, surrender.

She turned away to carry on in the direction she was headed in before she was stopped. She wasn't ready to go back to Skyhold. Solas' hand shot out again, returning his grip on her arm. He didn't want her to run from them. From him. She turned around and looked at his hand gripping her arm. His eyes were full or worry and concern. Pleading. She sighed and took the hand that gripped her arm and held it within her own, pulling him along to follow her. He did so with curiosity.

Ghilan had led them to the same spot where she had comforted Solas. She sat down with her back against the tree and Solas followed suit. Once seated she dropped his hand and brought her knees to her chest and hugged them to herself.

And she began. She told him everything. Of Andruil, her parents, her escape, Neil, Elise and Arno, Magister Adonis, her second escape, her coming across Merrill and Fenris, and of their operation they started. Ghilan had told him everything that led up until now. Once she was finished she just sat there numbly, staring at her feet. Solas' mouth had opened and closed. His emotions were all over. He felt anger, pity, and shock. She admitted to him that she felt and extreme sense of guilt. About leaving her parents and Neil. She felt that she owes her life to a great number of people, all who helped her. She even thanked himself, The Dread Wolf.

"I don't want to go back there Fen Harel." Ghilan admitted. "What they must think of me now."

"Ghilan. Whatever they heard or think, it matters not. At the most you can expect sympathy."

"It's the looks they will give me, already have given me." Ghilan said with anger. "I don't want that."

"It will be unavoidable Ghilan," Solas tried to reason. He stood and offered his hand to her, but please. Come back with me."

"But – "

"I will be with you Ghilan. For as long as you want me to be."

She looked in his eyes and then hesitantly took his hand. "May I sleep with you tonight?"

Solas smiled, knowing that all she was looking for was a friend to keep her company. "Of course Ghilan." He had said, but what he wanted to say was a word that he held dear to his own, " _Vhenan._ His heart."

By the time Solas and Ghilan reached the entrance to Skyhold they found that most of the people had retired for the night.

Ghilan was relieved that she didn't have to deal with anybody else. She thought of Merrill and Fenris. She felt so guilty. The look in Fenris' eyes and Merrill's shed tears. They were caused by her and she ran from them, from everybody.

Solas had led Ghilan up to his room. He ushered her to the bed and she got in. He moved the covers around her to make her comfortable. He made a move as well to make himself comfortable on a nearby chair but stopped himself. He looked back down at Ghilan, laying on her side, eyes open. Waiting it seemed.

Solas reasoned that he was doing this because he didn't want her to try and run. He didn't want her to go through this alone. He had gotten on the bed and moved the covers down so he can lay next to her. He laid on his back and then looked over to her again for reassurance. Her eyes were still open. Waiting. Solas shifted himself so he cupped her form with his own, laying a hand across her middle. Ghilan had taken that hand and held it in her own. He felt her frim grip on his hand, her breathing evening out, and he watched as she closed her eyes in attempt to rest. Ghilan needed something to hold on to, to keep her there, grounded. Once Solas had seen her features relax more, he then allowed himself to drift off as well.

**Author's Note: I can't really do Cole's way of speaking, so that is the best I could come up with. Lol.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Ch 17: Be Still …**

 __ _ **Be Still by The Fray**_

Ghilan had awoken to find herself laying next Solas. Her head on his chest, with his arm wrapped around her waist holding her close.

She stayed like that, just relaxing and enjoying the feeling of being held. However, she knew she would have to get up eventually. She needed to explain things. Especially to Fenris and Merrill. People may know now that she is a mage and that her real name is Ghilan, but they do not know what time she came from.

The only one who knows everything now is Solas.

Ghilan made to shift out of Solas' embrace. As she did so though, she felt his grip tighten on her. He cracked an eye open, and shifted it down toward her.

"What are you doing?"

"As comfortable as this is Solas, I can't stay in bed forever. Besides, I can't hide here forever either. I owe some explanations. Especially to Merrill and Fenris."

Solas shifted himself so he was sitting up as well. "How are you this morning?"

"My eyes feel swollen and the rest of me feels like I've been run over by Druffalo.", Solas chuckled at that, "But … I do feel lighter; I suppose?" Ghilan finished, face scrunched up, trying to find the best way to describe it.

"Laying your burdens and thoughts on someone else does indeed help." Solas smiled with gentle warmth.

"Let my burdens be yours, and yours be mine?" She asked quoting.

"Precisely."

Ghilan smiled back at him.

"Thank you Solas. I'm sorry I was – I acted –," she sighed, "I'm sorry for how I acted towards you Solas. You were trying to be a friend and I was trying to push you away. I am – "

Ghilan was cut off by Solas' hand cupping her face and his thumb on her lips.

"Stop." He said looking straight into her mismatched eyes. "You have nothing to be sorry for Ghilan."

Her cheek still in his palm and his thumb on her lips, the air grew still. His thumb began stroking her bottom lip as they stared into on another's eyes. His gaze fell to her lips, as if realizing now what he had been doing.

Ghilan sat still, unmoving. Her heart was beating in her chest as she saw Solas' intense gaze linger on her lips. She felt her face grow hot as she watched his eyes. His gaze me hers and the movement of his thumb on her lips ceased, his thumb stopping at the corner of her mouth.

He moved ever so slowly towards her, gauging her reaction. He stared into her eyes until his lips met hers.

His lips were chapped slightly, full and inviting. Warm and patient.

Ghilan was inexperienced, so she followed him and let him lead.

Her heart was beating rapidly in her chest. His hand moved from her face, burying itself in her short hair, while his other gripped her waist. She laid a hand on his chest and felt that his heart was beating in time with her own.

Their breathing became heavy as Solas deepened the kiss.

Until a knock resounded through the door.

"Hey Chuckles! You in there? Did you find Nyx?"

Solas groaned. He then bolted up, sitting straight up he had realized what he was doing, as he parted his lips from Ghilan's.

"Varric." Solas cursed in a whisper. "Ghilan, _Ir abelas,_ I'm sorry." He said shakily.

Ghilan couldn't help but smirk at how he seemed right now. Flustered. The feared Dread Wolf is … flustered.

Ghilan took in a breath and opened her mouth, "Yes Varric. He found me." She laughed at Solas' stunned look, however, feeling rather playful she added, "I'm doing much better now thanks to him."

At hearing that though, Solas smiled brightly towards her and she returned it.

"HA! I knew it! Sear owes me two sovereigns! Get your asses outa bed you two!" Varric shouted, his voice going distant as he walked away.

Solas got up ad off the bed, extending a hand towards Ghilan. "Shall we then?"

Ghilan sighed, straightened her hair and clothes, took his hand in hers. She smiled at him.

"Yes. I suppose we shall."

Solas accompanied Ghilan down the stairs and lead her near the Rotunda, that is until they were stopped by Varric. Who has this enormous grin on his face.

"So Nyx, you spent the night with Chuckles again? People will start to talk ya' know." Varric waggled his eyebrows.

"Let them.", Solas interjected, stepping closer beside Ghilan, which did not escape Varric's eyes, "She needed a friend, and I was willing to comfort her." Solas replied.

Varric face went solemn as he recalled on the events of last night.

"Nyx, about last night. I'm sorry that happened. The kid … he means well, but he does have a pretty big mouth."

"Varric, I understand." Ghilan sighed, "I'm not angry with Cole. I appreciate him caring enough to do so, however, there was no need."

"Ghilan." Solas chided at the same time Varric retorted, "Yeah, sure there wasn't."

"Look, Nyx – Ghilan, whatever your name is, it helps to talk to people. Bottling up your feelings, especially things like that, attempted rape," Varric admonishes, "is something you should absolutely talk to someone about. Not talking about it can make you go weird in the head." Varric shook his head.

"Look, your past is your own, I get that, but don't let things eat you up inside."

Nyx looked at Varric for a long moment, then hugged him. He went still as Solas' eyes widened a bit.

"I know Varric. Thank you for understanding."

Varric coughed a bit out of bashfulness as Ghilan released him. "So what should we call you now? I assume Ghilan is your real name right?"

"Yes. The name that I was born with is Ghilan. When my former master, Magister – no, it's just Elise now, when she found me she gave me the name Nyx. Apparently I had an affinity for the night." Varric rose his brows, but she just continued. "Anyway, people who I trust immensely, I allow to know my real name, "Ghilan". Most others just know me by "Nyx". I was once told that names were powerful things and to be careful who you allow to know your name."

"So what can I call you then?" Varric asked.

"That depends. Can I trust you?"

Varric made a sound of disbelief, "I would like to think so, yes. At the very least you can trust me to be a good friend."

She was thoughtful for a while, looking him over. "You may call me Ghilan, Varric."

"Alright then. Then I will call you Nyx." Varric smirked.

"What? Varric I said you can call me by my real name." Ghilan was confused.

"I know, but if Ghilan is your real name, then I will use "Nyx" as your nickname. Perfect."

"That's not very creative Master Tethras. You've lost you touch." Solas teased.

"Hey, now! She's a hard woman to name!" The rest of you make it so easy, Chuckles."

Varric addressed them both in a half joking manner. "You know, if you allow rumours to spread that you and Solas are spending nights together, it may help people forget about the incident last night."

"It might." Ghilan agreed. "For now though I should explain this to Merrill and Fenris."

"They didn't know?" Varric asked surprised.

Ghilan shook her head, "No one did, besides the one's who were present at those times."

"Ah, shit. Nyx, I'm sorry."

She just shook her head. "What's done is done. Secrets can be only kept for so long until someone or things finally reveals them."

At that, Solas' breathing had stopped for a short moment.

"You are one brave woman Nyx."

"No, there are people far braver than I. I'm just good at dodging things and hiding."

"It'll get better." Varric said patting her arm, not really sure what to say to that.

"It may." Was her reply.

"Oh right, I just remembered the reason why I was looking for you in the first place. Evie is heading into Crestwood today. Chuckles, she needs you along."

"Naturally." Solas accepted.

Varric left the room and Ghilan was heading out as well when Solas stopped her. He took her hand and urged her to face him, so she did.

"Will you be alright Ghilan?"

"Yes, Ma saranas lethallin."

Ghilan was actually inclined to let the kiss they shared be forgotten. She wasn't in the right state of mid. She reasoned she was just needing to be comforted and that she was wanting to think about something else, feel something else. Though she knew that wasn't the case, not really, but she didn't know what she felt for Solas.

Solas faltered at the use of "lethallin". A friend is basically what she called him.

Of course he felt that they were. They had been becoming increasingly closer. He thought – no – he felt more. He felt that they were more than that, could be more. But neither were ready to admit it out loud. Though they may insist to themselves to forget the kiss, neither one of them can deny that something had changed between them.

An understanding. A bond…. Love.

Nyx dreaded the walk to Fenris' and Merrill's room, but she owed them. When she got to their doo she stood there breathing in a deep breath, then letting it out slowly. She prepared herself for both of their extremes. Merrill; being very teary eyed and emotional, and Fenris' rage. There was no guarantee they'd be in their room anyhow.

She knocked three times and waited.

Oh boy.

The door had been opened by Fenris, whose face was hard and unreadable. Fenris gestured for her to come in. When she entered Merrill wasn't there.

"Where's Merrill?" Ghilan asked.

"She is assisting the mages in their "tower"." Fenris replied a bit coldly.

"Oh." Ghilan said. "Fenris, I wanted to apologize and explain to both of you what happened. I'm sorry, I should have mentioned it. I never wanted anyone to find out. Especially in that way. I panicked. I promised I will make it clear. I will explain – "

"You and I are sparing today Nyx." Fenris cut her off. The use of the name he chose to use for her had her wincing. It hurt. "Nyx" was meant to be used by people who she didn't quite trust. Fenris and Merrill, but especially Fenris, she trusted him immensely and it hurt her that Fenris used "Nyx" as if to imply that she doesn't trust him.

Ghilan knew Fenris was angry. Which is why she accepted Fenris' plan to spar without further question. Her eyes downcast, she sighed wearily, "Alright."

Fenris had been relentless. His strikes were hard and punishing. But she kept pace with him. Every swing he took at her, he meant to actually do a bit of damage. He had gotten a couple of hits in, however she had been able to dodge most, and thanks to Fenris' teaching, she'd been able to actually block and withstand a few. He smirked at that, but then his face went hard again. As if he remembered that he was suppose to be angry with her.

By now they had drown in a crowd of Inquisition soldiers and refugees. Some mages had come out to watch as well including Merrill. Krem came out of the tavern along with Bull who had started betting. Soon, the space in font of the tavern grew crowded with the groups of people who had come to watch the spar.

Fenris and Ghilan ignored this and continued on. When Ghilan went in for a jab, Fenris used his marking's ability to do his flux move. There was a concord of astonished gasps.

"Let's make this more interesting. Nyx," Fenris addressed her, "use your magic now as well." Fenris ordered.

However, Ghilan hesitated. She had never used it in combat before and she wouldn't use it against Fenris. She was still in training for Maker's sake.

"Fenris but I'm – I'm – ", Ghilan stuttered.

"You need to train with your magic now too Nyx. Not just meditating, but in combat as well."

"But Fenris, I don't want to hurt you!" Ghilan pleaded, eyes wide.

Her magic was different. Unique. Unknown.

"I will be able to handle it." Fenris reassured her.

"But – "She began to protest again. Merrill had come up closer to get a better view.

"Trust me." Fenris gritted through his teeth, seething. Eyes boring into her. He was asking her to trust him, to confirm that she still does. He wanted proof.

"Fine, you stubborn man!" Ghilan snapped.

Fenris just smiled and pushed her further. "Then … shall we begin?" He mocked.

"Yes, ma falon, let's." Ghilan challenged as she cast a spirit bolt his way.

He had dodged it, but as Fenris recovered from his dodge, Ghilan was upon him with her daggers. She moved furiously, but he matched her speed with is own.

He went to take a swing at her and she had no time to deflect with her blades, so she summoned a wall of ice to shield herself. She then turned it to a winter's grasp and flung at him. It hit him for sure, and Ghilan was concerned she'd hurt him. However, he got up, seemingly undamaged, besides the frost nipping at his hair.

He charged at her with great speed, markings lit and he swung at her again and again. She dodged and blocked, but he was moving with such agility and she was finding that she was having difficulty keeping up. If she slipped up and he managed to land a hit, she would be seriously hurt. She knew he wasn't going to let himself injure her too badly, but at this pace she started to panic.

His movements were a blur and she was tiring. The crowd was silent in the suspense. Ghilan began to feel it again. The burning sensation. She started to panic even more. She tried to back away from Fenris, withdrawing herself, but Fenris wasn't allowing it. He cam at her with even more persistence. Something clicked in her head. As she tried to keep up with him, she briefly glances at his face. He was determined. He was acting with purpose. He came in close and strikes, she blocked with her daggers, and they came face to face. He gritted out to her, "Let it out Ghilan. Believe that you can control it." He continued pushing. "I will help you if you struggle." He flashed his markings in reassurance. It hit her. Fenris was purposely trying to draw out that power.

"I trust him. I will not hurt him. I trust him. I will not hurt him." She said over and over to herself as she called on the feeling, her magic. Her arms were giving out.

He was making her desperate. She breathed in and out, in and out. Flickering bright lights lit her palms that gripped her daggers.

It happened so fast.

In one quick movement she suddenly dropped her daggers and for a very fleeting moment Fenris had been scared that he'd impale her. He wasn't expecting her to do … that. Though, just before contact, just as Ghilan dropped her blades, a force of bright light burst forward from her hands. Fenris had been sent back quite a distance.

She was stunned and looked towards him. He got up with mild struggle, but managed. He walked towards her, smiling while she was still slack – jawed.

"HA! And that's a draw!" The Iron Bull's voice bloomed, knocking Ghilan back into reality. She started to sway as the crowd dispersed. Fenris ran to her and caught her before she fell.

Merrill ran up to them from the crowd. "Creators, Ghilan! Are you alright?"

"I'll be fine Merrill." Ghilan waved away her concern, then as an after thought added, "I actually need to talk to you. To you both."

"How about we get some lunch first and then you can give us your explanation." Fenris mused.

" _As you wish_."

"Ghilan, you don't need to explain anything if you are uncomfortable with talking about it." Merrill empathized.

"No Merrill, its alright. I will be uncomfortable, yes, but I do want to explain it to you guys."

She felt a pit of guilt in her stomach though. No matter how much she'd want to tell them the whole truth, she was unsure. There was no doubt she trusted them, but she felt she shouldn't, couldn't. How do you tell someone you're actually from ancient times, you were promised to Andruil, oh and by the way, The Dread Wold isn't such a bad guy. No. Though it pained her not to do it, to tell them, it was better this way. Maybe one day, but for now, no. She wasn't alone in feeling that way. There was also Solas, Fen Harel. At least she had him. He was the only one who knows the whole truth now.

"Then let us go eat." Fenris declared. They headed inside the Tavern for a meal and to hear Ghilan's story.

What was suppose to be just her, Fenris, and Merrill, turned out to also include; Cullen, Lelianna, Dorian, Cole, Bull, and Sera, as they happened to also be in the tavern, along with Varric. Who just happened to let rumor spread.

Solas, Evie Vivienne, and Cassandra were at Crestwood, meeting Hawke. He wanted to lend what knowledge he had about Corypheous to the Inquisition. They'd be gone a couple of days at least.

Ghilan took a deep breath, looked at the others around the table and saw the anticipation. Cole had seated himself next to her without any indication and Merrill on her other side. She glanced at Cole. His head was cast downwards. Perhaps Solas wasn't the only one who knew everything about her past now.

"Yes. I'm sorry, but that is true. I know." Cole said quietly, replying to her thoughts.

Ghilan reached under the table and found his hand and squeezed it and continued holding it within her own. Cole was startled, wide eyed, but then relaxed when he felt her relax a bit at the contact.

"My parents had been slaves and when I was born, their master expected them to give me to him. Seeing my "exotic" features, their master intended to sell me when I had gotten old enough, when my features were more … desirable. When I turned sixteen, I think it was, my parents had me smuggled out of their master's land. Their master had eventually found out and had them killed. I was long gone by then. I stayed with my smuggler for a while, his name was Neil." Ghilan smiled at her fond memories of him and so did Cole, but he refrained from speaking. "Neil treated me as if I were his own child. He was a friend of the family. Unfortunately, I had gotten separated from him after years of being with him. I ended up lost in a forest. I was mentally and physically drained. I passed out."

The Lies and half truths fell from her lips so easily. Cole knew. Though, instead of speaking, every time he heard a lie he'd frown a little, but said nothing. Ghilan continued.

"Next thing I knew I was in a magister's home, Elise's home, telling me that she had saved my life and in order for me to show that I was grateful I would become her slave."

"Ar tu na'din emma mi." Cole quoted, "I will see your blood on my blades."

Ghilan chuckled a little. "Yes. I remember that."

"But you didn't?" Cole asked curiously.

"No. I didn't, and I am glad it never came to that." Ghilan looked around again. Everyone was still listening with rapt attention. She knows they all were waiting until she was finished to speak.

"I actually had no choice in the matter. At the time, I was too weak to even try. So I stayed. I met Arno, Magister Elise's head slave, who also happened to be her lover in secret. Arno explained to me who Elise truly is, so I decided to stay. I mean where else could I go at that present moment. Magister Elise was explained to me as a non violent woman. She didn't like to mistreat her slaves and looked after us. We basically kept her company. Though, she was spoiled, that one." She chuckled. "Anyway, I stayed with them for three years. By then Arno and I were the only ones who were close to Elise, who really knew her. We became friends."

"You befriended a magister who enslaved you?" Fenris asked incredulously.

Ghilan turned her head to look at him. "Yes. At the time it did seem crazy, but she was helping us. You see, when she bought slaves, her mind – set was that if she bought them before another did, she saw them as lucky because she would definitely treat them far better than most."

"That's … a very noble idea." Fenris conceded and Ghilan began to speak again.

"Anyway, Elise liked to go on expeditions to find artifacts and she would hold parties to show off what she had found. Another magister by the name of Adonis had snuck in – "

"Ah, Adonis. That man is a complete self consumed prick." Dorian interjected.

Ghilan smiled a small smile. "Yes, well, he was trouble in the past times as well. During this particular party though he insisted I help him with something." Ghilan squeezed Cole's hand a bit harder and he laid his other on top of hers. Ghilan gulped down and took a breath. "He got me alone, away from the others and attempted to rape me."

The table was full of gasps and wide eyes, raging remarks went around. Fenris had slammed his fist down on the table enraged. Ghilan carried on though.

"I fought him off though. It had been the first time I experienced me magic. And it was the first time I killed a man."

"Blood pooled around his body, eyes widened, "What have I done!" Footsteps entering. "Ma Halani!"" Cole explained the memories as if reading a script.

"I was in shock when I realized what I had done. If anyone found out I would've been killed."

"But it was self – defense!" Cullen snarled.

"It doesn't matter. Elves have no rights in Tevinter. Slaves have been killed for far less." Fenris added bitterly.

"I heard footsteps approaching. I waited and saw Elise and Arno passing by and I called out to them for help. They had told me that they would cover it up, stage it to make it look like Adonis had gone after Elise and Arno had been defending his master. Elise told me to run. She gave me my freedom. Just like my parents and Neil had." Ghilan let out a shaky breath. "A couple of weeks later I came across Fenris and Merrill and about a year later, here we are." Ghilan concluded.

As she expected there were questions and bouts of sympathies and expressions of anger at what she'd gone through.

"Wow. Just wow." Bull shook his head.

"Piss. Now I'm angry and depressed." Sera announced with annoyance.

"Nyx. Shit, I'm sorry you went through that." Varric came up to her and patted her shoulder.

"Ghilan. I – I had no idea … no idea you had such a shitty past." Dorian said.

Merrill wrapped her arms around Ghilan. "Ir abelas lethallan."

"It's alright Merrill. I'm fine now." Ghilan reassured her, patting her arm.

Fenris, in a rare show of intimate, public affection walked right up to Ghilan and hugged her. Ghilan had gone stiff with surprise.

"Thank you Ghilan." Fenris spoke low as he pulled away.

"If I may Nyx," Lelianna spoke up, "When we first heard this from Cole he mentioned the name "Ghilan". I'm curious now. What would you prefer to be called?"

Ghilan sighed and explained the reason why she kept her name a secret and the history behind her alias.

"I guess it doesn't matter now, call me what you wish." She said shrugging her shoulders.

Lelianna nodded.

"Okay then! Now that, that depressing shite is done with let's drink!" Sera exclaimed joyously.

It was early evening when they cleared out from the tavern. Merrill went to check up on the mages one last time and Ghilan decided to retire for the rest of the evening. Fenris had tasked himself with the duty of walking Ghilan to her room. Once they reached her door Fenris thanked her again for telling them, for trusting them, for trusting him. Ghilan smiled and bid him goodnight.

She closed the door and got into bed. She sat up, covers drawn up over her legs that she had tucked within her arms, knees hugged to her chest, she began to cry.

She was disgusted with herself. After seeing Fenris' relieved look on his face, thinking that she had been fully truthful to him. As soon as she saw that she knew. She held herself tighter. Without a warning Cole appeared and sat beside her, rubbing her back.

She didn't say anything. She didn't have to. Cole had sensed what she had just realized. That she was afraid.


	18. Chapter 18

**CH 18: Lil Darlin' …**

 _Lil Darlin' by ZZ Ward (ft. The O'Mys)_

Ghilan awoke feeling drained, but honestly, having cried most of her feelings out and talking to Cole had helped.

She had gotten up and out of bed, bathed, and got dressed for the day. She wore her blouse, corset, and leggings with her foot-wraps. Ghilan looked down at herself and for a moment of vanity she wished she had some new clothes for her wardrobe, if you could even call it that. However, her practical mindset kicked back in. She couldn't carry around a wardrobe of clothes anyhow. Shaking her head and running her fingers through her short, wavy midnight coloured hair, she headed out of her room.

Ghilan stepped out and turned to close the door behind herself. When she turned back around she jumped, startled. One of Leliana's spies had, all of a sudden, appeared behind her.

"Nyx, the Spymaster would like to speak with you."

"Fenhidis! Crap, you startled me." Ghilan breathed deeply, hand on her chest.

"I am … sorry. She requests your presence." The messenger apologized.

Ghilan saw that smirk the they were fighting.

Annoyed, she straightened herself.

"Alright then. Thank you."

Ghilan decided to go through Solas' rotunda. As she walked through, she marvelled at his art work. She headed up the stairs, passing Dorian on the way. He had given her a simple nod of the head. She was grateful that he did not intend to bring up what happened yesterday. She just wanted to forget yesterday and move on. What had happened to her then is in the past now.

She arrived to where Leliana had resided. She was sitting at her desk reading a report.

"You wanted to speak with me?" Ghilan spoke.

"Ah, yes. Nyx, I have some missives that arrived earlier this morning. My scout had informed me that they have to do with your network. Updates I believe and inquiries." Leliana explained, handing the papers over to Ghilan.

"Thank-you. I will gather Merrill and Fenris. We will go over them together.

"Very well then." Leliana replied.

Ghilan was pivoted to turn away when Leliana stopped her.

"Another thing. One of my agents, an Inquisition Spy by the name of Miller is being held captive by some of the nobility in Val Chevin. So far she has them tricked into thinking that she is just a simple bard from the Orlesian court, but I'm afraid they will catch on to her soon. I wold like you and one other from your team to go."

"Just me and one other?"

"Yes. This is a mission where discretion, and your ability to blend in, will come into play. Whoever you feel will be able to handle this will work fine. I was thinking that you and Fenris would work – "

"Because we were slaves." Ghilan finished for her.

"… Yes …" Leliana hesitated, "but you both know how to act in a certain way towards nobility. Ultimately the choice is yours though. You and whoever you choose will make your way to where they are holding Miller."

"She is being held in a prison though, right?"

"Yes."

Ghilan's face dawned a concerned look.

"Plan it out how you must, but you see why we need this to be quick and quiet, without alerting any of the guards. The Inquisition cannot be seen as having any involvement with this. It could cause a great deal of trouble. You and your team aren't officially Inquisition, so if you are spotted, they have no reason to suspect your ties with us."

"I see."

"I can send Miller tools to escape on her own, but I would prefer this way. I believe it is safer for her and it guarantees she will make it out."

"I understand Leliana. I'll speak with Merrill and Fenris about this as well. We will get back to you. This will be a priority."

"Thank-you Nyx."

Ghilan had went to look for Merrill and Fenris right after and she explained everything.

"So you have to choose one of us?" Merrill questioned.

"Yes. She had suggested Fenris, having you there Merrill might come in handy though."

"Yes, but we also have to deal with these missives." Fenris reminded them. "We shouldn't forget that our organization holds priority as well."

Yes, you're right." Ghilan agreed.

"So one of us will to answer the missives then." Merrill said.

Ghilan looked between them. Merrill and Fenris shared a look and nodded at her.

"I will go with you Ghilan. If the Spymaster suggested it, then I will go."

Ghilan nodded.

"And I will stay here and see to these." Merrill said, taking the papers from Fenris.

"Alright then."

"So, its just the two of us going to Val Chevin?" Fenris asked.

"Yes." Ghilan answered.

"What's the plan?"

"I'm not sure yet, but we will come up with one on the way, won't we."

Fenris sighed, shaking his head he smirked. "Yes, I suppose we shall."

They had reached Val Chevin by hitching a ride.

They couldn't be seen with having any involvement with the Inquisition, which meant no Inquisition mounts.

On their way to the prison where Miller was being held, Fenris and Ghilan went over their plan.

Ghilan had volunteered to use her "womanly advantages" to distract the guards. She was to walk in the prison, pretending she was separated from her master and was lost. Lelianna had supplied them with the appropriate clothing in order for them to blend in.

Distracting the guards required that she had to get close enough to one. She did just that. She batted her eyelashes and put on her most innocent and sweetest face. She whispered hushed words in his ear, allowing him to grope at her at his leisure. While the guard was too occupied with her, she subtly reached for his keys and tossed them to Fenris who was watching near by. He caught it without a sound. He saw what Ghilan was doing to distract the two guards and his blood started to boil.

She was getting too close to them for his liking. Chatting up the one who she had gotten the keys from, actually letting the pig grope at her while the other guard watched the interaction with great pleasure.

He was going to have a word with her after. Ghilan said she would distract them. She had said nothing of doing that! Letting those shem treat her like she works in a brothel. Fenris was like a slow storm brewing.

While Ghilan was entertaining the guards, Fenris had silently crept towards the doors leading to the holding cells. He wasn't called the Lyrium Ghost for no reason.

He walked quietly down the hallway of cells. It was practically empty. He came across two men who were in their cells asleep. Further down he came upon the sleeping form of a woman.

"Miller." Fenris thought to himself.

Looking around to make sure it was clear, he called to the woman. She stirred and turned around. He nodded once before he unlocked the cell and stepping inside.

"Who are you?" Miller asked

"Lelianna sent us." Fenris replied.

Cocking her head, Miller asked confused, seeing only Fenris in front of her. "Us?"

"Yes. My friend is back there cozying up to the guards and I really don't think she'll last much longer before she wants to gut them. So any questions can wait until we are out of this place."

"Fine then. Lead on."

Fenris and Miller had come across Ghilan and the guards.

One had seated her on his lap while the other knelt in front of her, kissing her neck. Ghilan had her head tilted upwards, eyes tightly shut, white knuckles gripping her servant dress.

To the guards, it might've seemed like she was enjoying this. To Fenris, he saw barely contained fury. Ghilan, no way in the Void, would she let pigs like them tough her in such a way.

His own rage surfacing with hers, he smirked a little. He knew she was ready to kill them.

Fenris had easily snuck up behind them as the chair was facing the opposite way, and the man kneeling in front of Ghilan was too preoccupied with her chest.

Fenris had swiftly knocked the man holding Ghilan down on his lap out by sending a punch flying to the side of the man's head. Ghilan startled at first, an so did the man in front of her. Before he had a chance to react, Ghilan sent a kick to his groin and then one to his head, knocking him out as well.

Ghilan smirked, relieved Fenris had gotten to Miller. She was going to thank him, until her smile started falling upon seeing Fenris' disapproving face.

"Fenris I – "

"We will talk about this later. Right now let us get Miller back to Skyhold."

"I – yes. Alright." Ghilan said. She felt like a child waiting to be scolded by her father.

They made it back to Skyhold with little trouble. Miller had gone to speak with Lelianna right away, leaving Fenris and Ghilan alone. Fenris gestured for her to follow him to a more private area.

"Fenris I'm sorry." Ghilan got out before Fenris opened his mouth.

"Do you even know what you are apologizing for?" Fenris asked in annoyance.

"I – n – not entirely, but I can see you're very upset."

"Upset? Ghilan I am more than upset!" She winced as his voice carried more force. "Those guards were all over you! And you were letting them! You were letting them use you like some common whore!"

"We needed a distraction Fenris." Ghilan said. Her voice finding a bit of steel after hearing him call her that.

"Yes, but you didn't say you were going to go and do that! You said you'd pretend to be lost! If I'd known you would that, I'd never allow it!"

"I did in fact do just that, Fenris, but I needed more. What else would distract shemlen men more than seeing a lost, defenceless elven woman being easy." Ghilan reasoned. "Why are you getting so angry Fenris? We accomplished our mission with success."

"Because, Ghilan, I care about you greatly and I would never want to see you reduced to doing what you did this evening. You are better than that Ghilan. You deserve better." Fenris replied. His anger dissipating.

"Fenris …"

"Never again Ghilan. You hear me? I will not allow you to do that to yourself again." Fenris said sternly. It was just only now that Ghilan had realized he had gotten so close that they were only inches apart.

"Why, what happened?!"

Little did they know, that Evie's group had gotten back shortly after they did. Solas just happened upon them, catching the last bit of their conversation.

Fenris stepped back away from Ghilan as she spoke. "Solas, you're back?"

"Yes. What happened?" He asked a second time.

Ghilan didn't speak for a few moments.

"It's nothing." She bushed it off.

"Really?" Solas looked to Fenris, unconvinced.

"We were out on a mission – "

"Fenris!" Ghilan stopped him.

"Well then you tell him. I'm sure he will be just as "upset" as I."

"Fenris …" Ghilan whined.

"You two talk. I am going to find Merrill." He said, leaving Ghilan and Solas in an awkward silence.

"H – how did your task go today?" Ghilan asked trying to distract him. Unsuccessfully of course.

"We saved Crestwood from corpses, closed a rather large rift, and met up with Hawke and a Grey Warden that had valuable information. Now, Ghilan, what happened?"

She hesitated, fiddling with her fingers. This was ridiculous. She wasn't a child! Right now she was feeling like she was being treated as such. She understood Fenris' concern, but to make her have to explain it to Solas … It was just embarrassing.

Ghilan sighed defeated. The look on Solas' face said he'd find out one way or the other.

"Come with me. I'll tell you in my room."

She walked up the stairs of Skyhold's battlements and reached her door, Solas following closely behind. She entered and so did he, not bothering to wait for an invitation. He was concerned. Fenris sounded so serious and angry.

Ghilan took a seat on her bed while Solas just decided to remain standing, arms crossed with an expression that said, "Well then."

"Lelianna sent us to Val Chevin to break one of her spies out of prison. I couldn't think of a way at the moment honestly." Ghilan interjected her story and then continued. "We had clothes provided for us so we could blend in. Mine was made with some unintended advantages."

Solas' face twitched, showing a bit of concern, having the feeling of knowing now why Fenris was sounding the way he did when he stumbled on them talking. Ghilan still continued speaking.

"I was to distract the guards, pretending to be lost and separated from my mistress. Luckily there were only two of them. Fenris was to sneak by while I had the guards' attention and I'd get close to the guards and pass Fenris the keys. Then Fenris was to unlock the spy's cell. However, distracting the guards needed more effort, so I let them, uh, grope me, and make them believe me to be an easy elven woman."

Ghilan winced, waiting for his lecture. Solas' face was neutral though. He showed no reaction to what she had just said.

"You seduced them?" He asked

"Kind of."

"You made yourself to seem as those in a brothel Ghilan?" His voice becoming angrier at the use of the word brothel and her name. Ah, there was the reaction she was expecting.

She sighed, "We needed a distraction, and it was the quickest thing I could – "

"Did they touch you?" Solas cut her off.

"Yes …, that is what groping is."

"Did they kiss you?" He had clenched his teeth.

"I – um, yes. On my, uh, neck and went to my chest." Ghilan replied ashamed. Solas was visibly angry now.

"Anything else Ghilan? Did they do anything else to you?"

She thought about how she was being held, seated on the lap of one of the guards. She had felt something of his prodding her. Ghilan had struggled not to make any movement in that moment. She did not want her show of moving to be taken another way.

"No." Ghilan said, eyes slightly shifting from Solas, which he caught.

"Ghilan. The truth." He said sternly.

Her face turned to annoyance. She was not a child!

"One of the guards held me down on his lap while he other was knelt in front of me kissing my neck and chest. They were fondling me. I know. I am just as disgusted. I was ready to kill them – "

"I would've killed them before they had a chance to lay a had on you." Solas said darkly.

Ghilan swallowed thickly. "We needed a distraction. The mission was a success."

"A distraction!? Ghilan," Solas stepped closer, he bent down so his face was close to hers. He trapped hew between his arms where he supported himself up with his hands on either side of her thighs. "What they were planning could be considered as rape! Fenhedis Ghilan!"

"I – ", she swallowed, eyebrows drawing together. She hadn't thought of it like that, she saw it as her seducing them. It was a distraction.

"Fenris came before it went any further anyway Solas. And it wouldn't have gone any longer if he didn't show up when he had, I was ready to kill them as soon as they had me seated."

"Well it's good to you see that you had the sense to feel to do so at least."

"Are you implying that I would've actually enjoyed that!?" Ghilan questioned him, angry and offended.

Solas paled at how that came out of his mouth. "No! That's not what I – "

"I can't believe you would say that! Even after I told you about what happened with Adonis. Of course I'd want to kill them! I wanted to the moment they laid their hands on me! I'd never allow myself to be touched like that ever again! To be used like that, unless I deemed it necessary for a mission or I want to be!" Ghilan fumed.

"Ghilan, I know. I'm sorry. I misspoke. Please let us drop this." Solas apologized. Urging her to calm down.

"Yes. Let us drop this finally, please. Fenris already gave me a scolding and forbade me from attempting something like that again." Ghilan replied. Frustrated, but she was starting to calm down.

"As would I." Solas agreed. He himself calming down as well. Until he saw the bruise on her collar bone, just above her breast where her blouse had slipped down, just a bit.

Ghilan noticed Solas had gone stiff. She followed his gaze. He was staring at … "Oh no." She had to move her blouse to cover it back up, but Solas caught her hand, his eyes snapping to hers.

"Solas –."

"They marked you!?" Solas' anger rekindeling. He felt his possessive streak kicking in. His pride wanted it to be his mark that was left on her skin. He felt a heat in his belly at the thought. He knelt down in front of her and brought a had up to inspect the bruise. He opened his mouth. What he wanted to do was use his mouth to re-mark her as his. He wanted to kiss that spot until his mark was more prominent than the shem's. He mentally shook his head, barely restraining himself from doing so. Instead what he did, when Ghilan saw him open his mouth was speak.

"Ghilan," he breathed, "please let me heal this. Erase this from your being."

Ghilan swallowed. "Yes. Solas, please do."

Solas nodded, determined to rid her of it. As he traced the bruise with his fingertips, he allowed his magic to pour from them and on to her skin. Healing the mark until it was no more.

"Thank you Solas." Ghilan said, looking in his eyes.

They still hadn't talked about their shared kiss. They had silently agreed to forget it. But she couldn't. Of everything that she had heard of, of the Dread Wolf, he is nothing like how she had envisioned him.

Sure, when she first met him, she thought he was handsome, he still is, but the more time she's spending with him, the more she learns what he is really like. Ghilan had no illusions that the stories she had heard held some truth.

However, she is finding out that there is more to him.

And knowing both sides of him is what is making her fall for him.


	19. Chapter 19

**CH: 19 … Hearts On Fire.**

 _ **Hearts on Fire by Passenger**_

Ghilan's and Solas' eyes parted, clearing throats as they shifted awkwardly

"The Inquisitor has plans to march on Adamant fortress today." Solas spoke, breaking the tension, rising to stand. "The Grey Wardens plan to do a ritual to bring fourth an army of demons."

"What!" Ghilan rose up as well. "Why would they do that!?"

"They are being mislead. They believe that they will be able to destroy the old gods with this horde. Evelyn wants to go and prevent this. She wants to speak to everyone about it. Her advisors and inner circle."

"Oh, but why are you telling me then?" Ghilan cocked her head to the side.

"She will be taking most of the Inquisition's soldiers, mages, and scouts. I wanted to inform you as a precaution if you were asked to come."

"If?"

"Yes. She will not take everyone, but she will need strong people, mentally and physically."

"Then we should go. I can't sit here and do nothing. You guys are going to war."

"I understand that, but … I would prefer if you were not asked."

"What? Why? We could help. She needs every willing and able body. I would like to go. Where is she? I'll request that she – ", Ghilan moved towards the door.

"Ghilan, please." Solas took hold of her wrist. At hearing his voice, she turned to him questioningly.

"What's wrong?"

Solas had pulled her by the wrist, bringing her to him. He wrapped his arms around her, hugging her to him and spoke in in her ear.

"I cannot bear to lose you Ghilan. I would not risk it; you mean too much to me – ma Ghilan."

She startled at the endearment. He called her his. Ghilan blushed.

"What makes you think you'll lose me?" She chuckled nervously.

He pulled away, "A feeling, and I am not the one to believe in such things, but this one is rather persistent. I do not want to chance it."

"Ma nu venien, but if I am asked, you know I will go."

"Yes, then please, be careful. Come let us get some air. We aren't preparing to leave for few more moments yet. We have time."

"Alright."

Solas and Ghilan walked the battlements, hearing the others below preparing the assault. They had about a half hour at most until everyone was ready, she thought.

"Do you miss it? Solas asked her as they stared down at the hustling people.

"Miss what?'

"Back then, when Arlathan stood. When the Elvehn empire is what dominated most of Thades. Do you miss how the magic used to feel? The beauty of it all back then?" Solas asked in curiosity.

"I was a sheltered child Solas. My parents didn't want me out for too long. I would've drawn the eye of Anduil, my father would say, and then the huntress would want me right then and there."

"Because of your features, such as your eyes you mean?"

"Yes. When people saw me, they told me how beautiful and exotic I looked. Some thought I was special, others were cautious around me. So I was a bit secluded from them. I only knew of a couple of kids my age. Come to think of it, I met one who was quite handsome. He had already been marked. He came with Mythal when she would visit. He always seemed so proud to serve her. So serious, but proud."

"She was the best of us." Solas said sadly.

"I'm sorry. I heard you two were close."

"We were."

Ghilan smiled. "As for your question, yes. I do miss the beauty of our world back then. I know what you mean."

Solas shook his head, "It's all my fault that we lost it. This world feels so … wrong. Like it isn't real."

"Solas," Ghilan put a hand on his arm and urged him to open his eyes, "if you hadn't done what you did back then, the pantheon would still rule. Our people would still be slaves, no matter what. I believe you did good."

"But – "

"Solas the people here are real, they laugh, cry, sing. They are joyful, caring, cruel, and hateful. They hurt, kill, and steal. But, they also heal, help, and are generous. I believe, that this," she gestured to the yard below where soldiers were hustling about, people were getting ready to leave, "this is their time. We are the ones out of place Solas. We shouldn't be here," Solas jerked his head toward her, eyebrows drawn together, "but we are. We are here, alive and real. Just like them. And Solas, there is beauty in this world too."

Solas scoffed, skeptically. Ghilan laughed.

"Come on Solas, there is. You just have to look closer and open your eyes, your heart more. You can feel it, see it, and hear it."

Ghilan closed her eyes and stretched out her arms, as if she were basking in the sun. Solas watched her with interest.

"Every laugh, cry, shout, I hear. Rain falling, the clink of swords hitting each other. The sight," she opened her eyes, "seeing people, seeing them in this chaotic time, working together, despite race or religion. Every smell, every touch," she laid a hand on his. "There is beauty in everything Solas." Ghilan finished as she stared into his eyes and he stared into hers.

"Would you put things back the way they were if could Ghilan?'

"No. I miss how felt back then sure, but I love this world. I've made friends here; I've fallen in love with its people. I've gotten to meet so many. I wouldn't change a thing Solas. But what I would do, or am doing, is helping its people."

"The slaves."

"Yes. Over the past year we've been pretty successful."

"That is good to hear."

She regarded him for a moment. "You know, when this over, you should join us. If I recall you said you weren't too fond of the idea of slavery." Ghilan smirked.

"Yes. You have quite the memory." Solas replied, smiling.

"It was the first day I met you, and the day I escaped. It was pretty memorable."

Ghilan caught his gaze shift to below. She could tell he was thinking about what she had said.

"Give them chance Solas, to change the way you see things. Give me a chance."

Solas turned to her, as he did so a bell was rung to signify people to gather so they can be sorted out and told what is to be done.

They walked towards the stairs where Evie and her advisors stood, addressing the crowd, and giving out orders for those who were coming along. The others remaining were instructed to watch over Skyhold in case something were to come their way.

To Solas' great relief, Ghilan and her group were not asked to come, He turned to her to give her a smile of relief. However, when he saw Ghilan's face, it was one filled with concern, for Solas had been named to go. He reassured her, told her he, they would be fine, mostly anyway. Nothing that they couldn't handle.

The army left the remaining people within Skyhold's closing gates. Ghilan, along with Fenris and Merrill, ran up to the battlements to see them off. As they watched the group march their way on to Adamant, Ghilan couldn't help but feel something bad was going to happen. She took hold of the nearest hand, Merrill's, and held it within her own. Praying for the groups safe return.


	20. Chapter 20

**CH 20: To Know Him is To Love Him …**

 ** _\- To Know Him is To Love Him by Amy Winehouse_**

"They're back!"

Someone on the battlements shouted. It was late evening. Most of the people at hearing that dropped what they were doing and ran towards the entrance of Skyhold, ready to welcome back the army.

There were soldiers who had come into the hold cheering joyously, while others, mainly the Inquisitor, Solas, Varric, Bull, and the advisors; Cullen and Lelianna, and Hawke, came back seemingly shaken up. They held grim expressions and their eyes seemed sunken, like they didn't sleep. As if they were kept awake by nightmares.

Ghilan was in her quarters washing up. She had just finished training with Fenris and practicing her magic with Merrill. Without anyone to give them any assignments to do, it had been a few rough days. The three of them worked on answering their reports from their organization, but other than that the days had been dull and boring.

They should've been back by now.

Ghilan had tried to keep her mind preoccupied with other things. Such as this bath she was now taking. However, the countdown in her head just kept on ticking.

She rubbed her eyes and let out a frustrated groan. She let herself slid deeper into the bath's hot soapy water, only leaving a patch of her head sticking out and her bent knees peaking out from the water. She held her breath for a good measure and as she resurfaced, she ran her hands from her eyes throughout her hair. She exhaled slowly as she did so, eyes closed until her hands passed her hair and landed on her shoulders.

Her ear caught a faint creek and she whipped her head to the wall that partially separated the bathing area from the rest of the room.

"Hello?" Ghilan called out firmly.

She heard the dragging of feet, she was ready to jump out, naked and all, to yell or attack whatever just barged in and did not answer her.

Suspense drew out for a short time until she saw who had entered. Surprise, then relief, and then joy came to her. However, they quickly were turned to worry as she saw his downcast face and sunken eyes. He terrible, like didn't sleep.

"S – Solas? What are you doing? Are you alright?"

Solas' head lifted, though his eyes held sadness to them.

"Solas?"

With no response he reached the bath and knelt on the floor beside it, as Ghilan tried to cover herself with the dispersing bubbles.

Without warning he reached for her face with both hands and kissed her.

It was hard, fast, needy, and she squeaked in surprise.

Just as quick as it came it was over.

Solas pulled back leaving Ghilan blushing, wide eyed, lips still parted. Her mind was slowly catching up to what had just happened.

"Ghilan, you're here and alive." Solas creaked out and as if reassuring himself he kissed her again more gently.

Ghilan was beyond red now, and the heat of her bath wasn't helping.

"Solas!?" What is going on? What happened? Of course I am here and alive. What's this all about?" Ghilan's red face was starting to turn to concern.

She was no longer caring for modesty. She was more concerned about what happened to Solas.

"Ghilan, just please – let me join you." He requested of her with a pained expression on his face, already taking his clothes off. Ghilan blushed madly as she quickly put her hands up as he was about to strip from his leggings and undergarments.

"What!? Solas, please stop! Just tell me what happened." She urged nervously.

If it was any other day he would've laughed at how she held her hands up, blocking her view of him.

But it wasn't.

He had witnessed something horrid and, he knew it wasn't real, but he couldn't shake it from his mind. At least not alone.

As he continued stripping he just retorted with, "I will, but please …"

There was nothing hungry in his gaze. All she saw was pain and pleading.

"Alright."

" _Ma sarranes ma Ghilan."_

He made to get behind her, but she stopped him and urged him to sit in front of her. He sat with his back facing her, cross-legged in the water. There wasn't much room, so Ghilan had to shift so there was room for him to sit comfortably in the bath. She brought her hands up and started massaging his neck, shoulders, and back.

He groaned at the sensation and she felt him relax slightly.

"Solas what happened?"

"We – we got pulled into the Fade. Physically. It was incredible." He breathed out.

"How'd that happen?'

"The Inquisitor -mm-," he let out another moan, "the inquisitor, she had opened a rift, saving us from a deadly fall from a collapsing bridge, and we were drawn in." He took a breath. "There was a nightmare demon."

At those words, Ghilan's hands stilled. She now had an idea why he looked the way he did. She waited for him to continue, but he wasn't so she resumed to massaging him.

"The demon, it showed us our greatest fears. Nightmares that haunt us. Mine was – is," He reached behind his neck to still her hands. He shifted himself so he was facing her, "my greatest fear Ghilan is dying … alone. The demon showed me the one person who I might spend eternity with. Then it had showed me a twisted version of where you perish. Killed. The one person who can truly know and understand me. The one person who has become most important to me. And I am left alone."

"Solas." Ghilan started slack jawed.

"Ghilan please." Solas shifted himself so his whole body faced her. "I can't pretend that I have forgotten our kiss any longer. Something in it had woken me up. You have woken me up Ghilan. It would kill me to lose you." He braced himself on his hands that supported himself on the edge of the bath, allowing him to move closer to her, hovering over her. He brought his lips to hers, head tilted as he whispered, " _Ar lath ma._ "

He kissed her gently and passionately. Ghilan was too stunned to do anything but kiss him back.

He pulled away gently and looked at her, gauging her reaction for any reason to stop as he shifted closer between her legs and brought his hands to cup her bottom and seat her on his lap. He looked into her mismatched eyes and saw that they were dilated, as he was sure his was now also. Still he saw now sign of rejection in her eyes. She bit her lip in anticipation. She felt him as he seated her on his lap. They were almost chest to chest, his head bent down slightly to look in her eyes. She was ready and eager. Sense felt like it had left her mind. All she could think of was one thing.

"I think … I love you too." She breathed out as Solas began to go in for another kiss.

 _**AN: I'm sorry for the short chapter. I am planning on having the rest of the chapters typed out and uploaded during this week. I will try my very best. I'm sorry to keep you guys waiting._

 _Lol, Tbh, I had a very smutty scene planned out after this part, filled with moans and groans. But as I was re-reading my rough copy, I started to think that it would be best to leave it off at this sweet moment and let your guys' imagination take off from there._

 _Though, I will say this, being the mischievous wolf that he is, Ghilan was in for a long night. ;) **_


	21. Chapter 21

**CH: 21: Glass …**

 _ **Glass by Daughters**_

The next morning, hearing knocking on her door, she awoke.

Solas was still in a deep sleep while, she being a lighter sleeper, got up. She looked around, searching for her clothes. The knocks were becoming more eager so she took the first thing she found.

Solas' shirt.

She quickly put it on. It barely reached mid – thigh and was slightly large for her frame. She answered the door cautiously.

Ghilan opened the door to find a beaming Merrill. "Oh Boy." Ghilan thought to herself. Merrill and Fenris' room was just beside hers. There was a very good chance that Ghilan could guess correctly as to why Merrill was banging on her door.

Merrill's eyes took in Ghilan's appearance. Ghilan wearing the man's shirt outlining her chest area confirmed it especially. Merrill's grin grew wider and Ghilan face palmed. At that Merrill squealed.

"Oh! Ghilan! I knew it! I knew you two would get together! I'm so happy for the both of you!"

Ghilan cringed at how loud Merrill was being. "Yes, well, thank you very much Merrill."

As Merrill continued chatting with Ghilan, Solas had awoken. He sprang up quickly hearing Merrill. He wasn't embarrassed about being with Ghilan, oh no. It was just that he was seriously underdressed for visitors. He looked around for his clothes, finding only his leggings and undergarments, he pulled them on swiftly. He started looking around the room for his shirt.

Merrill had caught movement passed the door frame, from inside Ghilan's room and saw Solas pacing around. Merrill smiled brightly and greeted him.

"Good morning Solas! I hope you and Ghilan slept well, and that you are feeling much better now. You looked rather down when you came back from Adamant."

Solas neared the door, bare chested, save for his pendant hanging around his neck, and wearing only his bottom half of his attire. He had noticed, and greatly appreciated that Ghilan was wearing his top half. His shirt.

He stood slightly behind Ghilan, giving a curt bow of his head, as incline.

"Yes I did, and yes I am feeling better than I was previously. Thank you for asking lethillan."

"I'm just happy to hear – or – to see you two finally together. Well, I'll leave you two alone now. Oh and before I forget, Ghilan, Evie said she'd like to speak with you, me, and Fenris. A favour, she said. She'd like to speak with us in the stables."

"Alright then. I'll meet you there in a moment." Ghilan replied.

Merrill smiled wide at them then turned and left.

Ghilan closed her door and leaned her back against it and sighed.

"I have a feeling that we will be found out very soon."

Solas moved closer, appreciating how casually and comfortable she looked in his shirt. "I do not mind it as much as I thought I would, surprisingly." He kissed her chastely. "Good morning _ma lath_. Sleep well?"

"Very. I've never been so worn out yet so relaxed before."

"I'm glad." He hummed.

"And you? Are you truly feeling better? You really had me worried."

" _Ir albelas_ , Ghilan. The nightmare really shook me, but being with you helped me out of it." His face grew with seriousness. "But I didn't want you to get the wrong impression. I came to you not for a 'casual ease of stress', no. The vision made me realize, that even though we are immortal, we may still die. And I was being foolish in wasting my time not being with you. I love you Ghilan. And I will be with you as long as you want me to be."

She smiled and kissed him. "I love you as well Fen Harel. Now let's get dressed."

It took the two new lovers a few more moments to leave Ghilan's room due to … distractions. They both felt so at ease with one another. So when Ghilan was about to leave to meet up with Merrill and Fenris in the stables, Solas had offered to escort them and before he left them, Ghilan hesitated, but smirked as she turned to him to kiss him. Solas had taken the kiss in stride, ignoring the onlooker's cat calls as he deepened the kiss. They parted as people started a small applause. It was a surprise to most and entertainment for some because they had never witnessed Solas being intimate with anyone in that way until now.

Solas said his goodbyes for now and it was automatically back to business. Ghilan held a noticeable glow to her tanned skin. Evie was in the stables as she had been told and she happened to be one of the people applauding. Blackwall would've too … if he were there. Which is why they were called to meet. Apparently, Blackwall is actually Thom Rainer, who is being held prisoner in Val Royeaux. Evie asked them to get him out. Either with force, subtlety, or diplomacy. She didn't really care at the moment, she just wanted her friend back. Ghilan chose to do this subtly along with her team. It was just her luck that there happened to be a prisoner in the Inquisition dungeons who held similar characteristics to Thom, they just needed little altercations and then they'd have their double.

They had gotten to Val Royeaux and switched the real Thom Rainer with the imposter and no one would be the wiser.

Rainer had stopped in his tracks as soon as they reached a secluded area.

"Why did you get me out? I deserve to be punished for what I've done."

"Evie wanted you out." Ghilan replied.

"Still, I shouldn't able to walk free for what I did. I deserved that. Being in there. She should not have done this."

"Look. Evie wants you back at Skyhold. She got you out because she trusted you and she felt that you two were friends. If it makes you feel any better, you aren't exactly free just yet. Evie as the Inquisitor, would like to judge you herself and deem a punishment." Ghilan clarified.

They carried on their way back to Skyhold.

The verdict was sentenced. Evie felt punishment Blackwall – Thom Rainier, was to carry out serving the Inquisition. And them handed over to the Wardens when their mission complete. It had not been a decision made easy, however she realized that Thom would like that outcome better than anything, even if he may perish at the Joining or at the hands of the other Wardens.

Later drinks were hold in the Tavern.

Ghilan had entered with Merrill and Sera. Fenris was already there in doing some sort of drinking contest. Ghilan heard the commotion and knew for sure Fenris would be hard to beat. He could sit perfectly still with his hardened emerald eyes, staring right at you, and you would never know he had just downed three bottles. Solas had walked in a little later to an amusing sight. Fenris and the Iron Bull downing mugs of alcohol in a competition. He saw Ghilan and smiled. He walked up to her and laid a hand on her shoulder as he took a seat next to her. She leaned her face near his and greeted him with a kiss.

"Uh, you two get a room!" Sera voiced.

"Oh we will later, Sera." Solas replied teasingly and she just groaned again.

They were all eventually dragged into another game of Wicked Grace. At one point Ghilan had seated herself drunkenly on Solas' lap, squinting at her cards.

Later that evening, Ghilan and Solas had retired back into her room. It was another night of long, slow, passionate, partially drunken, love making.

They were entwined and exhausted. He lifted his head and look at her disheveled appearance. He saw the wound he had made and was ashamed. It was brimming red, with noticeable bite marks, a little bit of blood specking it.

"Ghilan," He breathed lifting his fingertips, ghosting them over the bite, "I am so sorry. I hurt you _ma lath_."

She felt the stir of magic from his fingers. She took his hand within her own, halting him.

"No, leave it. It's alright Solas. I want to keep it _ma sa lath_. I am yours."

Solas was taken aback. "No Ghilan. I would not lay claim upon you. No one should."

"Ah, but I know bear your mark," she smiled at him with warmth, "and it is a mark I will wear proudly." She kissed him and turned away from him to get some rest.

He was glad for that for one thing.

She did not see his appearance falter, his eyes sadden.

"If she knew, she would not be."

Was his thought before he cupped her form with his own and drifted off to sleep as well.


	22. Chapter 22

**CH 22: Roundtable Rival …**

 _ **Roundtable Rival by Lindsey Stirling**_

Ghilan had been picking herbs with Merrill when Varric and Fenris were darting towards them.

"Daisy! Nyx! Come on let's go! We're heading to the Arbor Wilds!" Varric shouted.

As quick as they could they gathered their supplies and ran towards them. They all started running off when they grouped together, making it in time to hear the Inquisitor's overrun of the plan.

Ghilan's group had been chosen to accompany Evie and her team, which consisted of Solas, Bull, and Cole.

The battle was never ending it seemed. Hordes of Red Templars flooded the Wilds.

As they made their way further in hoping to reach the Well of Sorrows that their guide, Morrigan, said to be what Corypheus' goal is located, they came across Sentinels. Ancient elves.

After their surprise wore off from their first brief encounter, fighting with the Sentinels, Ghilan and Solas shared a brief puzzled look.

Clearly something else was going on than them just fighting their way through Red Templars to get to the Eluvian first.

Morrigan had led the two groups to a temple that she said to have belonged to Mythal. Solas eyes were reminiscing, however he could always say he'd seen it in the Fade before it become eroded.

Ghilan couldn't. She was still inexperienced in that area. Solas was just beginning to teach her the basics. Ghilan stared in awe as they moved through the temple grounds.

As they entered the large sets of doors leading to their destination, Ghilan thought to herself, "This is nothing of what Andruil's grounds looked like." She'd only seen the inside of Andruil's place once as a small child. No one saw her, but when her parents heard what she had done from her own mouth, she was scolded and told never to go in there again. However, she remembered how filthy a place it was. The slaves were constantly cleaning. Firs and skins strung up, head of animals decorated the walls. Dried blood stained the fine carpets and drapes.

Mythal's is far cleaner looking for being left as long as it has.

"It is not abandoned." Cole announced, replying to her thoughts. "They look after it." He said as he pointed a finger.

The group turned to look to the direction he was pointing in. A hooded figure standing atop the platform connecting the staircases.

As soon as they took note, Evie whispered, not taking her eyes off the hooded figure, "We're being watched."

Ghilan and Merrill turned to see more Sentinels pop up, bows drawn and aimed. Ghilan had her hands itching to move to her daggers strapped on the side of her thighs.

They were crafted by Dagna for Ghilan specifically. It was a request from Fenris and Solas. Solas had wanted her to get use to a staff, but Fenris knew Ghilan's fighting style better, and knew she would prefer daggers over s staff. So they went to Dagna who had come up with a solution. Magically imbued hand crafted masterwork daggers that allowed Ghilan to channel her magic through them as well. A combination of both. However, Ghilan had become proficient in needing no additional support when casting she could just use her hands. Though as Dorian would put it, "It's not as stylish."

" _Venavis."_ The hooded person spoke.

"An elf then." Ghilan mused.

"You," he spoke to Evie, "bear the mark of magic which is," he slowly shifted his eyes to his eyes towards Solas and then quickly snapped them back to Evie, "familiar. How is this come to pass? What is your connection to those who first disrupted our slumber?"

Evie conversed with the man, explaining their situation. As they spoke Ghilan felt something familiar about this man. She stepped closer, up more with Evie and peered at him.

Albelas, was his name, took note of her gaze, offended almost. He continues talking to Evie, but every so often he gazed back to Ghilan. Solas noticed his eyes as well.

"Our people have lost everything from this world. They need you. We could learn from you." Merrill addressed Albelas pleadingly.

Ghilan felt a stab of guilt.

"Our people." Albelas parroted. "You mean the ones we see in the forests, shadows wearing Vallislin. You are not my people." He spoke disgusted.

Merrill looked back, eyes downcast, sorrowful. Fenris stood beside her, an arm around her shoulders, glaring up at Albelas.

Ghilan had gotten defensive. Familiar or not this man had some nerve.

" _Tel'dirth ash aron mala!"_ Ghilan spoke head held high, eyes angry.

"Nyx!" Solas hissed.

Albelas was about to retort, but then he got a clearer look at Ghilan's eyes. His own widened in surprise. No one could forget those eyes.

 _"Ma? Thu?"_ Albelas asked.

"It is unimportant at the moment. We need your help."

"Albelas, we need to get to the Well of Sorrows before Corypheus' men do. Please." Evie begged.

He considered, "You have paid your respects to Mythal's temple. I will allow it. But once your business is done with fighting off your enemy you will leave. I will not see the Well despoiled."

"Thank you." Evie said gratefully.

"I ask though to speak with your companion." Albelas pointed his finger to Ghilan.

"Why?" Fenris and Solas both spoke, Solas stepping beside Ghilan.

"It is none of your concern. If this woman has a problem with it she can speak and I will not pester her."

"It's alright. I will go." Ghilan said stepping forward.

Solas halted her by taking her hand. " _Ma' av' in._

"It's alright."

"He can come if he wishes." Albelas announced impatiently.

As Evie and the rest of the group re-supplied with the aide of the Sentinels, Albelas led Ghilan and Solas to a secluded corner. Albelas reached a hand to Ghilan's face but was stopped by Solas' quick reflexes. Albelas took note of Solas' warning gaze and addressed Ghilan.

"I've seen you before. On the grounds of Andruil. Haven't I?"

"Yes."

"I had bumped into you while I was escorting Mythal around Andruil's grounds."

Ghilan chuckled. "Yes. I was carrying supplies back to my parents and it clattered on the ground. But you were kind enough to help me gather them up. Mythal too if I recall."

"I had heard you had died."

"It was faked."

"I can see. Yet here you are now?" Albelas asked dumbfounded.

When had seen her last she was just a would-be slave girl, who hadn't come into her magic yet.

Solas took the chance to cut in. He had stayed quiet long enough between their exchanges. Albelas was looking too interested in Ghilan for his liking.

"She has raw talent. She has the power of an incredibly powerful mage and she has gone into Unethera, unknowingly."

Albelas look perplexed but accepted the answer he got.

"However you came to be here, now in this time, your face is a welcome if surprising sight. As it is a pleasure to see you again as well Fen Harel."

"Please Albelas, just 'Solas' will do."

"I will try my lord."

Solas groaned at the title.

They rejoined the others, and Albelas spoke. "Come I will have a guide go with you. I will go ahead to make sure the well stays pure. Even if I have to destroy it myself." Albelas turned and left.

"No!" Morrigan has panicked and cried out. She shifted into her raven form and flew off to try and beat him to the well.

With Sampson defeated Evie's group including Ghilan's made it to the Well just moments after Albelas and Morrigan got to it.

"Morrigan!" Evie called out

"He wants to destroy the Well, Inquisitor! He will let all this go to waste!"

"Too keep it from your greedy fingers!" Albelas shot back.

"Enough!" Evie bellowed, halting both if them.

"Morrigan back off! Albelas, please. We need the Well in order to stop Corypheus from using this Eluvian."

Albelas slumped and Morrigan looked irritated, but she eased off.

Do you even know what you ask?" Albelas implored sorrowfully. "As each servant of Mythal reached the end of their years they would pass their knowledge on through this." Albelas gestured to the well. All that we were, all that we know, would be lost forever."

"I am sorry Albelas. This can't be easy trying to protect what you have left." Evie sympathized.

"You cannot imagine. Each time we awaken, it slips further from our grasp."

Solas spoke up. "There are other places, friend, you can find other duties. Your people yet linger."

Albelas smirked looking back between Solas and Ghilan. "Elven such as the two of you?"

"Yes." Ghilan and Solas said in unison. "Such as I." Solas finished.

Albelas looked to the Well, thoughtful for a moment and then turned to address Evie once more. "Is that your wish then? To drink from the Virabelasan then, and fight your enemy?"

"Only with your permission." Evie inclined her head towards him.

Albelas smirked knowingly. "No. One does not obtain permission. One obtains the right." He paused. "Use it if you must, but know this. You will be bound to the Well of Mythal, just as we were bound."

Morrigan scoffed. "Bound? To a goddess who no longer exists, if she ever did?"

Evie was intrigued. "Is it possible she's still around? You know, that she does exist?"

"Anything is possible."

Morrigan shook her head. "Elven legend states that she was tricked by Fen Harel and banished to the beyond, along with all their other gods."

Solas held a neutral face. Ghilan gave his hand a casual brush.

Albelas corrected Morrigan. "Well, 'Elven legend' is wrong. He had nothing to do with her murder."

Morrigan's face had paled and she stammered. "What?! I – I said nothing of murder.

"What!?" Merrill's voice questioned in shock.

Albelas continued unfazed by their surprise. "She was slain. Mythal was betrayed by those who had destroyed this temple, yet the Virabelasan still remains. As do we."

"So what now?" Evie asked.

"Our duty ends."

"Are you leaving the temple then?" Ghilan spoke up.

"Yes. Why remain. We were tasked to watch over this temple and guard the Well. Once one of you takes part of the Virabelasan, nothing will remain. There will be nothing left to guard. Why stay?"

"There is a place for you, lethillin, if you wish to seek it." Solas offered.

"Perhaps."

Evie inclined her head towards Albelas one last time. "Thank you Albelas."

"Do not thank me for this." Albelas shook his head, knowing that they had no true idea of what will happen.

"Why not come with us Albelas? Help us fight. We could use someone like you on our side to fight Corypheus. He killed you people."

"No, Inquisitor. We killed ourselves."

Solas had stepped forward and rested a hand on Albelas' shoulder. " _Malas amelin ne hala, Albelas."_

Albelas merely nodded and walked away, leaving the Temple of Mythal.

There was a huge debacle over who should drink from the Well. Morrigan and Merrill were willing and wanting. However, Fenris had forbade Merrill, just as Solas forbade Ghilan when she had offered so they could just be done with it.

Evie had even offered though Morrigan was quick to point out the flaws of that idea. So Evie suggested Solas, who panicked at the notion.

"What about your son Morrigan?" Evie asked concerned.

"He is a smart, strong boy. He – he will be fine."

"Morrigan…"

"He will be fine Inquisitor. We need the Well. We need to come to a decision soon. Corypheus will be upon us any minute." Morrigan stated as she heard the doors being banged on that sealed them in the sanctuary.

"Are you sure this is what you want Morrigan?"

"It is."

"Then take it."

And so she did.

Morrigan waded into the waters of the Well, marveling at the essence it held. She looked at the others and saw their concerned faces. She merely smiled and let the waters swallow her. After a moment of silence, she arose. Morrigan had looked as if she was in a trance. Ghilan had noticed that the water was draining and it appeared like it was being absorbed by Morrigan's body. After the water had disappeared Morrigan had fainted and fell to the ground. The others had run to her. She woke up in shock and speaking a language no one but Ghilan and Solas could understand.

"Thank the Maker! Morrigan, are you alright?" Evie helped her up to her feet.

"Yes, I believe I am. Thank you Inquisitor for this. You cannot imagine what this means to me."

The doors had burst open. Corypheus had now entered the sanctuary.

"Quick! Through the mirror!" Morrigan shouted.

They all scrambled through. Evie was the last, but just before she went through, she caught the sight of some sort of spirit arising from the Well in a massive wave of water. The spirit, woman, arose defiantly in the path between the mirror and Corypheus. Evie wasted no more time, as she too leapt through the mirror. The spirit followed suit, shattering the eluvian, cutting off Corypheus.

They had made it back to Skyhold safe, accomplishing their goal.


	23. Chapter 23

**Ch 23: Break the Cycle …**

 _ **Break the Cycle by Rose Ave.**_

Evie had stayed with Morrigan, taking her to speak with her advisors in the war room to go over what they feared. The knowledge that Morrigan now posses and their next plan.

Shorty after that, celebrations were called for. The tavern was as lively as ever. Varric was in an arrow shooting contest with Sera, Leliana, and some of the other archers. Bull hosted a drinking contest. Fenris and Merrill had sat down with the Bull's Chargers. Merrill was talking with Dalish while Fenris was conversing with Skinner. Evie stayed for the celebrations for a bit, long enough to witness Dorian landing a big, sloppy, drunken kiss on Bull's cheek. She left wanting to see a certain commander who she found staring at reports on his desk. Ghilan had been talking with Krem, listening to his wild stories with the Chargers. Krem was a good man. She saw him sneaking glances at the bard of the tavern and Ghilan suggested that maybe he should talk to her. He had brushed it off.

"Maybe some other time." Krem replied.

"Alright Krem." Ghilan said finishing the rest of her drink, patting him on the head as she stood to leave. She noticed Solas had not been in all afternoon, and now it was dark out. She decided to go see him.

She had found him painting. She sneaked in, settling on his chair, watching him. She heard him chuckle.

"Hello, _ma_ Ghilan."

"Solas, that is beautiful." She marvelled at his work.

'Thank you, _Vhenan_." Solas said as he put down his paints and brush and turned to her. She got up and walked towards him.

"Today was … exciting, wasn't it?" Ghilan commented.

He sighed. "Yes. It was. However, it was a pity to see Mythal's temple like that. It did not deserve such a fate."

"I hope Albelas will be alright."

"I'm sure he will, _ma_ Ghilan. He is strong. He will endure." Solas kissed her forehead. He looked into her eyes and decided.

"Will you come with me _ma lath_?" Solas smiled at her, cupping her cheek.

"Of course _ma Fen_." She replied, whispering the last part as she turned her head to kiss his palm.

"What is this place?" Ghilan asked Solas, seeing two giant Heart statues in a grove with a pond of water,

"We had come across this place, Evie and I, and the others, in Crestwood." He placed a hand on her cheek. "The Veil is thin here, can you feel it?" The magic tingling on your skin?" He dropped his hand as she rose hers to the cheek he had held. She brushed her fingertips along the skin of her cheek and smiled up at him.

"I – I wanted, I was trying to determine a way to show you how much you mean to me."

"You don't have to do anything Solas. You've shown me many time over. I see it in your eyes, feel it in your kiss, the way we make love, and in how you talk to me. I feel it within the beat of your heart. I know what we mean to each other."

"Still. Ghilan you had awoken me. Opened my eyes to new possibilities. When I first saw you, when you were a terrified child, stunning eyes, trying to flee enslavement, I was intrigued. But never could I have foreseen that you would be here now. That you would be the one person who understands me best. You are the one I trust the most. I have fallen in love with you and in all my years and past lovers, I now feel like I have finally met my match. My heart.

 _As lath ma, ma Ghilan, lasan ara'lin sul saota._

 _Lasan ara' sal sule ha'lam 'sal' shiral._

 _Telas ema em, ame grian ara'len._

 _Y la' var nuvenir, sul'eman emma ashan sul'ema_

 _Telas raja em, ame len' revas._

 _Y jusul' anan na iviem isalas._

 _I thai juem un'el redhe, garal o emma da'lava._

 _Ara dir'vhen'an._

 _Ma juveremas sael'prear ar emma dil._

 _Sael davathe o emma leyr._

 _Sasha mar melir julahran fra nydha."_ Solas kissed her and continued.

" _Sasha mar inan juithen fra dhea._

 _Juame mar shalasha, la ane emma._

 _Telam 'aven judrith ar em'am._

 _Var vas druast I'em'am, valvnem tel' juhartha ebalasha._

 _Juleanathan I mpithen na ove mirisal'shiral, I u uth'then'era."_

Ghilan's eyes were wide, her cheeks were blushing furiously.

"S-Solas was that what I think it was?"

He did a nervous laugh. "Yes, well the Dalish have used these words as vows at weddings, however, this – I do not want you to be alarmed. I would not do that without your permission first, but I found the words still very true. They are my promise to you."

"Would you ask me?" Ghilan asked him nervously.

"I believe so, yes. Though in time. I do not want us to rush into things we are not ready for." He stepped closer. "If I were though, hypothetically. What would have been your answer?"

"I believe," she stepped closer as well, so they were now chest to chest, "I would have said yes."

He kissed her passionately. Pouring out all his love for her, and he felt her return it just as eagerly. They were getting lost in one another. Though he remembered what he needed to tell her.

The truth.

He reluctantly pulled away, but still held her close.

"Then what I must tell you, the truth." Solas' face turned grim and she grew concerned.

"Solas?"

"The orb Corypheus used to open the breach. It was of elvehn origin and it was – was … mine."

"What?! How?!"

"It was not suppose to happen this way Ghilan."

"What do you mean, Solas?"

"I was too weak to open it when I awoke from my slumber. I – I allowed Corypheus to obtain it. Thinking when he opened it he would've been killed in the process, allowing me to reclaim it."

"You created the breach?" She asked incredulously.

"Not directly, but it is a result of my power being unlocked improperly."

"And what would you have done when you reclaimed it?" She backed out of his arms, which he allowed. It hurt him a little, but she needed space.

"I – I …" The Dread Wolf, the bringer of Nightmares, was afraid.

"Solas?"

"I would have torn down the Veil, restoring our people to what we were."

"But – but wouldn't that mean …" Ghilan was confused. "That would mean that the Pantheon would be freed. Would it not?"

"I had plan."

"Solas! Do you know how dangerous that would be? You would even release Andruil!" Ghilan panicked.

"I would not let them harm you _ma lath_."

"Solas, please." Ghilan was unsure.

"Ghilan with you, perhaps I may find a better way." He took hold of her hand and kissed it reassuringly. "Come, let us get back to Skyhold."

When they awoke back in Skyhold, in Solas' room, Ghilan was lost in her thoughts over what Solas had just confessed to her.

What Solas decided not to reveal, though, was the thing he was most afraid to tell her. He decided to think that if they can get back his orb with her help he can do it without anymore loss. But he dreaded it, if his plan was altered again. If he could not retrieve his orb …

He wanted to just focus on getting his orb back and helping the Inquisition at the moment. He did not want to think on it. For it haunted him, scared him if it came to it because he knew what he would choose. It would be for the good of their people. He must undo his mistake. He would forever hate himself for it as he knew she would not condone it if that were to happen. It would be a last resort then. The result of him tearing down the Veil if all else fails with no other way, in order for the elves to be restored, to bring back their past world, would be that the world Ghilan has come to love and love its people … must die.

They had turned to one another and kissed each other on sweetly on the lips. They held each other close that night. It was only them in that moment nothing else. No problems to worry about. Just their love for one another. They fell asleep, safe in each others arms.


	24. Chapter 24

**CH 24: Flaws …**

 _ **Flaws by Daughter**_

"Oh, Ghilan, you're glowing!" Merrill cooed as Ghilan walked up to Merrill and Fenris with their latest missives in hand.

"Oh Merrill please, I am not glowing." Ghilan responded. She may not have been glowing, but she sure was dawning a reddish hue now.

 __They decided to answer their missives in Skyhold's garden. It was a beautiful mid morning after all.

Ghilan had awoken that morning sore and well rested and relaxed. She was laying on Solas' bare chest with her head propped upon her arms, just watching him sleep. Ghilan had still found him breath taking. Even more so than ever.

She keeps thinking that if things hadn't worked out the way they had, then she would have never had gotten the chance to really know him, to care for him, to love him. In the time of Arlathan, others had said Fen Harel to be arrogant, cocky, seemingly uncaring, dangerous, cold, hot headed, and rebellious. However, he also helped those enslaved and he detested slavery. So obviously, she had reasoned, that he couldn't be "so bad". Which had been her initial thought after meeting him face to face the day she left Arlathan.

The Dalish clans of this time fear him. To them he is known as: The Trickster, The Betrayer, The Bringer of Nightmares, The Dread Wolf. They use his name as a curse. In their tales, they paint him as selfish. Hearing these tales from the Dalish, from Merrill even, did not sit well with her because she knew these to be a false perception of him that was only fractions of who he is based on small accounts. However, she couldn't really blame the Dalish for their false interpretations. They truthfully had lost so much of their past.

Now, Ghilan sees it all.

He is all of those things. And more.

She watches him sleep and she sees a deeply passionate man who cares for others more than himself. More than his own happiness and comfort. She sees the slump of his shoulders, the hunch of his back, and downcast eyes full of sorrow and pain. She sees this when he thinks she isn't looking. She can see that he blames himself for so much, it is hurting him. It breaks her heart to think of him like that. So if she can help ease his worry and guilt, his burden, she will gladly do so. For this man, Fen Harel, The Dread Wolf, is the man she loves with the entirety of her being. For as long as she can, she will be with him, she decided.

She will guide him through the darkness, the night, of his own mind.

 __"Fenris, wouldn't you say she's glowing?" Merrill asking him, grinning.

He stopped and took a good long look at Ghilan, who now stood arms crossed and hip cocked out.

"Actually, yes. She is." Fenris blinked to which Merrill giggled.

They had both asked their fair share of questions about her relationship with Solas. Both Fenris and Merrill knew she was being intimate with Solas. That had been sleeping together a number of times this passed month. In truth, Fenris was happy for her. He didn't trust Solas fully, but he knew Ghilan did and that she could handle herself if anything. Regardless, Ghilan had both Merrill and Fenris' support. She was one of them. She was apart of him, as much as Merrill was.

 __As Ghilan walked the gardens, Merrill and Fenris had decided to head back inside just a few moments ago, she head shouting.

She ran to the source colliding with a dishevelled looking Spymaster. Ghilan was confused staring after Leliana's hasty form disappearing from sight. She heard Evie's voice coming from inside the room she saw Leliana rush out of. At that, Ghilan had stopped in front of it and entered, seeing Evie muttering to herself before she was about to enter the shimmering mirror.

"What's going on?" Ghilan asked.

"Morrigan's son went missing and she thinks he went thro this Eluvian somehow. She just rushed in to go after him." Evie turned and looked at the elf in concern. "Please, come with me. Morrigan needs our help."

Without hesitation Ghilan nodded. "Alright."

 __Evie was shocked. She had been expecting the Crossroads which is what Morrigan had said that this mirror led to.

She was not expecting … this.

 __"What is this place?" Ghilan asked.

The sky … It was a sickly looking green colour. This place … It didn't feel right to be here, wherever they were. In the distance she thought she heard something. It felt as if it were calling to her.

"Oh Maker!" Evie gasped. "We're in the Fade?!"

"How?" Ghilan's eyes went wide.

"I've no clue. This mirror was suppose to lead to the Crossroads."

In the distance they heard Morrigan's shouts. They looked to one another and in the next moment they took off running, following Morrigan's voice.

 __"Kiren! Kiren, where are you!?" Morrigan shouted.

Evie and Ghilan came upon her. Morrigan was frantically pacing arms thrown up. As they neared Morrigan took note of them and turned to address them. It was then they saw the look on the poor witch's face. Eyes brimmed red with unshed tears.

"Inquisitor! Nyx! Please help, please help me find my son." Morrigan begged.

"How did he find this place?" Evie voiced as they searched and called the boy's name.

"I – I don't know." Morrigan sobbed. "We stand in the Fade! To – to direct the Eluvian here would require immense power." Morrigan pushed the palms of her hands into her eyes to hold back her tears. "If he is lost to me, now after all that I have sacrificed." She looked at the two other women with something they had never seen before. She looked at them with tears in her eyes, "Just please, help me look. Just a little longer."

They both nodded. "We'll find Kiren, Morrigan." Ghilan said and started calling out the Kiren's name.

Morrigan's gratitude shone on her face as all thee searched the infinite boundaries of the Fade calling out for her lost son.

As they continued on, Ghilan was getting an uneasy feeling.

And then they saw him in the distance and they started running.

"Kiren!" Morrigan breathed in relief.

As they neared though they saw that the boy … was not alone.

"Wait, who's that with him?" Evie questioned.

It was when they had a clear view, getting closer as they did, that Morrigan's face paled.

"It can't be."

Shock was soon replaced with rage as the figure arose at their arrival. Morrigan spat the word as if it were poison and for some reason Ghilan's blood went cold.

"Mother."

"Ha! Now isn't this a surprise." Flemeth rose from her spot.

"Mother!" The boy called out in joyously upon seeing his mother.

"What's this about?" Evie questioned. "Some kind of family reunion?"

Flemeth laughed. "Mother, daughter, and grandson. It does warm the heart, does it not?"

Morrigan bared her teeth. "He is not your grandson. Let Kiren go!"

Flemeth merely scoffed. "As if I were holding the boy hostage." She turned to Evie and Ghilan. "She's always been such an ungrateful girl."

The old woman's eyes lingered on Ghilan, as if in recognition.

"Ungrateful! I know how you extend your life you wicked crone! You will not have me! And you will not have my son!"

Morrigan was starting to cast a spell. Ghilan and Evie shared a glance as they felt the atmosphere around them shifting.

"That is quite enough daughter." Flemeth commanded. And just like that the spell Morrigan was casting was cancelled.

Morrigan gasped in shock. "W – What have you done to me?"

"I've done nothing, girl." Flemeth dawned a wicked smile. "You drank from the Well out of your own violation, did you not?"

"The – well?" Morrigan's face knitted together, eyes searching until her face stilled, eyes wide, mouth agape.

Ghilan's own eyes widened as she realized why this woman seemed so familiar. Flemeth turned her eyes on Ghilan upon seeing the same conclusion on the elf's face.

"You … are Mythal?'

"What! How?" Evie demanded.

Flemeth cackled again. "That dear girl is a very long story. But the short version is when I was but a woman in a cell, a spirit called out to me. Offered me to exact revenge on those who had wronged me as they did her. So I let her in."

"So she's a part of you?" Evie asked in confusion.

"No more than your heart is in your chest."

Flemeth gave the boy a nudge and he went to his mother who quickly embraced him.

"I'm sorry mother. I heard her calling. She said now was the time." Kiren rose to his feet and backed away from his mother.

Morrigan's heart dropped, falling into her stomach. "No Kiren." Morrigan started, trying to keep the panic from her voice. "You don't belong to her, neither of us do."

Kiren's face held sadness as he stepped back to Flemeth's side.

"I – I do not understand." Morrigan arose shaking her head, trembling.

Flemeth explained her past and how exactly she came Mythal in detail.

"I – That's absurd." Evie said disbelieving.

Flemeth turned to Morrigan. "You hear the voices of the Well, dear girl, what do they tell you?"

Morrigan concentrated. "They … say you speak the truth."

Flemeth smiled. She turned to Ghilan, "The truth is not an end, but a beginning."

Then her eyes met the Herald's. "A herald indeed. Shouting to the heavens, harbinger of a new age. As for me, I had far too many names. But you may call me Flemeth."

Evie's eyes widened even more. "The Flemeth? The Witch of the Wild's? I've heard your story. How you left your husband for your lover, then your husband tricked you, murdered your lover, and then imprisoned you. And then a spirit came to you. That was Mythal, right?"

Flemeth's voice held a tinge of amusement. "One day someone will summarize all the terrible events of your life, so quickly. But yes, that was me and how my tale began."

Evie pursed her lips. "Why stay hidden? Why not reveal yourself?"

"And to whom shall I reveal myself to exactly?"

"The elves!" Evie gestured to Ghilan, whose face felt hot with shame.

She laughed. "I knew the hearts of men before Mythal come to me. It is why she came to me." Flemeth smiled at Ghilan in understanding. "They do not want the truth, and I am but a shadow, lingering in the sun." Ghilan looked away.

Evie caught the exchange, eyes curious. She had noticed Ghilan had been deathly silent.

"Why did Mythal come to you?" Evie asked.

"For a reckoning that will shake the very heavens."

Evie looked to her companions. "So why did you come here?"

Flemeth turned to the boy. "For him."

"No, I will not allow it." Morrigan spoke defiantly.

"He carries a piece of what once was. You know this."

He is not your pawn mother. I will not let you have him!" Morrigan's voice pitched.

Flemeth gave her daughter a levelled look. "Have you not used him"

Anger and desperation filled her voice. "That was then. Now he – he is my son."

Flemeth's features softened a bit. "Our destinies are not so easily avoided, dear girl."

Kieran spoke up. "Mother, I have to."

"No you don't Kieran. I will not let her."

"Why'd you wait until now if Kieran is so special?" Evie questioned.

"Hm, I did not know where he was. My daughter hid him so well … until now." Flemeth smirked.

"T'was the Well." Morrigan's head hung in shame.

Morrigan dropped to her knees. "Kiren, I …"

The boy looked to Flemeth. "As you wish." Flemeth responded to an unspoken question. "As a proposal dear girl, let me take the boy and will be free from me forever. Or, keep the boy and you will never be safe from me. I will have my due."

Without hesitation Morrigan replied with strength. The strength of a mother's love. "He returns with me."

"Decided so quickly?"

"I am many things, but I will not be the mother you were to me."

Flemeth released a sigh, then turned and knelt in front of Kieran. A smile, kind and gentle, on her face. She took her hands and held his as a light orb danced from his chest and into hers.

Kieran's eyes went wide. "No more dreams?"

Flemeth smiled genuinely. "No more dreams."

With that the boy ran and embraced his mother, who had confusion written on her face. Flemeth spoke with heart and sincerity. "A soul is not forced upon the unwilling, Morrigan. You were never in any danger from me. Listen to the voice, they will teach you, as I never did."

She the turned to Ghilan. "You." Flemeth smiled. "Truths will always come out sooner or later. And it is always uglier later." Flemeth then cocked her head to the side curiously. "Your memory, girl?" Ghilan tilted her head. "Some parts of your memory have been suppressed. That is why you've been so confused. It seems it has been being suppressed for … a very long time." Flemeth grinned wickedly. "Longer than you even realize." She walked up to Ghilan, the others grew very curious at what Flemeth meant. They had no time to react to what Flemeth was about to do, nor did Ghilan.

Flemeth simply laid a finger on Ghilan's temple and Ghilan fell.

"What have you done!?" Evie rushed to Ghilan's side with Morrigan.

"The girl fainted is all. Do not fuss. I merely helped her. She … lost a part of herself long ago. It is why she has been struggling."

Evie took in a breath. "How did – "

"She will awake in a couple of hours. She may be distressed." Flemeth's wicked grin appeared as she turned to walk away. "Having memories rushing back to you from millennia ago will do that."

"What?!" Evie and Morrigan shouted, not believing at what they just heard Flemeth utter. Alas, it was too late to get a further explanation. Flemeth had disappeared as quickly as those words had left her mouth.

Ghilan awoke in her room, hours after they had found Kieran and Mythal – Flemeth.

Ghilan had simply sat up in bed and ran through all the images, the memories that had come rushing back to her. People usually call stuff like this a "wave", but no. This was more like a boulder that had smacked into her and sat on top of her. Her face was neutral as she recalled on the images that had flashed in her mind.

(Flashback)

She watched the scene unfold as her parents stood in front of Andruil. Her family, though powerful, was still considered to be lower in rank than those of the Pantheon.

It was a stupid match. In a battle against Andruil, one of their cousins wagered part of their family as a prize, as slaves. She remembered thinking, "Foolish, cocky idiot.", as they watched Andruil take down Anaris. Now she stood along her parents, along with the rest of their Order, awaiting Andruil's decision.

She remembered Andruil's wicked smile. "Ah, Rhoe and Mora." She laughed. "You two will do nicely! Two of the most powerful ones among you people. Especially you, Mora."

Mora glared at Andruil. When night came she would truly end that cackle of Andruil's. Her fists balled up. Rhoe noticed and took hold of them. His own power, the essence of darkness, seeping out of him as his anger arose. He would've killed Anaris for putting his family through this. He had no idea what was going through the idiot's head when he decided to try his hand at beating Andruil. But he refrained because somehow Anaris out ranked him and his wife. They were seen as the embodiment of darkness and night. The very personifications of it. It is a mockery of how Anaris out voiced them. Their daughter still hid behind them.

"Yes, you two will do. Step forward."

As they did they tried to usher their daughter further into the line up of the others. Unfortunately, Andruil's eyes are the sharpest there was and caught the movement. "Hold on, what do we have here?" The huntress cooed.

Mora and Rhoe pulled their daughter towards them. They tried to usher her behind their daughter again but Andruil was having no more of that. She parted the parents so she could get a closer look at the young girl.

"Oh my." Andruil smiled, however it seemed to be more out of mockery then politeness. "She has your beauty my dear Mora." The daughter's eyes narrowed and Andruil merely laughed. "And she has your temper Rhoe! Oh my indeed. The two most powerful creatures as my servants and their daughter. I wonder what power she would wield. I bet it would be as mighty as yours." Andruil looked to the parents

"She is still young, Andruil. You cannot lay claim upon her, as is your Elganon and Mythal's rules." Mora spoke defiantly.

"Oh right." Andruil said sarcastically. "Well then I guess she'll just stay with us until I can mark her. There's no need to split up this happy family."

Rhoe glared. Rank or no, he'd kill Anaris. He sold his family out. And for what? For their land. Coward.

Andruil smiled. "Very well, I will take Rhoe, his wife Mora, and their child. Hear me, as I will not mark the child until she is of age. But she stays in my lands. As for her parents, Rhoe and Mora, they will both receive the mark of Andruil!"

Claps rang through the crowd of Andruil's servants and the Pantheon. The rest of the people stayed quiet. Andruil's mark however did something else to them though. Andruil had snuck it in the ink that was to go into their skin. A spell. A curse. As they were being marked, Andruil spoke. "As of this moment these people are no longer Rhoe and Mora!" She cackled. "Their names are to be Lieve and San! They will no longer be the powerful, feared creatures everyone cowers from!"

Cheers rang about. Andruil had not only marked them, she was stripping them of their memories of who they are, taking away their unique skills and magic. Andruil turned to the young daughter, who had watched the whole sickening and horrible scene. Enraged as her parents fell to the ground having passed out.

"And you, young one. What is your name?" Andruil asked, running a finger down the girl's temple and cheek.

The young girl spoke, ice blue and grey eyes staring defiantly up at Andruil, until her world went black.

That was the missing piece of her memory.

Who she was and her true name. Her true nature.

The girl had many names now: Ghilan – "a guide", Nyx – "of the night". But the one she spoke, staring defiantly and vengefully up at Andruil was, Orynth.

Ghilan arose from the bed. A hard expression on her face.

She was the daughter of the two most powerful creatures other than those of the Pantheon. Her father, Rhoe of darkness and her mother, Mora of the night. She was their daughter Orynth, of vengeance. She was one of the long lost people of the ancient elves.

One of the feared beings.

She was a Forgotten One.


	25. Chapter 25

**Ch 25: No light, No light …**

 _No Light, No light – Florence and the Machine_

Upon this realization all that she felt now though sick. No, really. She bolted for anything she could spill her guts in. In that process someone head knocked on her door. And when the person heard her upheaving they come in.

"Ghilan?" Solas called out.

Her stomach dropped, which caused her a very unpleasant addition to what condition she was in now in. She vomited, again. Nothing left in her system to get out she gagged.

"Ghilan?!" Solas followed the noise and come to the sight of her huddled over a small bucket. "Ma Ghilan, are you alright?"

She gave him a pointed look.

"I – sorry." He rushed her back until her guys needed. She sat herself down on the bed while Solas fetched her some water from a near by pitcher.

After she washed away the foul taste in her mouth, and making certain she was finished, he spoke again.

"Ghilan, I heard that you, Evie, and Morrigan went through an Eluvian to look for Morrigan's boy. And that the Eluvian led to the Fade where you found Kieran. You passed out Ghilan. What happened?"

"I did. Flemeth was there. Morrigan's mother. Mythal', Solas."

"You saw Mythal? In the Fade?" Solas tried to add surprise in his voice. "How is that possible? She'd been murdered? What, her spirit, you mean you saw her spirit?"

"I don't believe so, I – she was there physically like Evie and I were. And she wasn't an elf Solas. She was human. She said that the spirit of Mythal come to her and they merged. So in a way, Mythal still lives.

"Fascinating." Was all he said. "But what had caused you to faint ma lath? Did you – Evie said that Morrigan's mother gave you back your memory? I wasn't aware part of your memory was lost."

Solas looked thoughtful for moment. "What is it that now remember, if you don't mind me asking."

She was conflicted. She should tell him. She should tell hi, that she is one of the Forgotten Ones. She Orynth. All the Forgotten Ones magics had dark purposes to them that's why they were separated from the Pantheon. They'd been Forgotten about after a time. And Orynth was one of them. She was born from two of the most powerful among the Forgotten Ones.

She remembered what special magic and skills she held. Orynth wielded daggers imbued with her own magic. A magic that was dark, cold, and vengeful. Magic that's pure essence was retribution. Revenge. She remembered her magic. She remembered her status as one of the dreaded Forgotten Ones. She remembered everything about herself that had been suppressed by Andruil.

However, she was afraid to tell the man she loved, for he had the Evenurais and the Forgotten Ones sealed away.

She wondered what he would do … if he found out he had missed one.

Orynth smiled up at him and let her power dance along her fingers in a movement as easy as breathing.

"My magic." She simply stated.

"Ghilan! That's wonderful to hear!" Solas took her hand in his and kissed her knuckles then moved his lips briefly on hers. He ended the kiss with a more serious look on his face.

She grew concerned. "Solas? What is it?" She asked her hand that was cupping his cheek moved to the as of his neck.

"The Inquisitor wants us to prepare for battle. One of the Spymaster's agents reported seeing Corypheus approaching Skyhold."

"He's coming here?!" Orynth's eyes flew open.

"Yes. Come _ma 'lath_. Let us go prepare. We have about a half hour at most from where the scout reported seeing them.

"What about Fenris and Merrill?"

"They are gathering their items and preparing as well. I told them that I would fetch yours."

Orynth rose swiftly. She stripped from her garments and adorned her armor that Solas handed to her.

"Alright then, let's go." She spoke and they bolted out her door and into Skyhold's yards and up the battlements where Fenris, Merrill, and Lelianna stood.

"Are you well?" Fenris asked, keeping his gaze on the horizon.

Orynth chuckled. "Very."

Fenris and Merrill both turned to look at her.

Fenris smirked at her. "Good to hear."

"I'm glad you're feeling better Ghilan. You've recovered at the right time."

In the back of her mind, Orynth couldn't help but think that maybe that her regaining her memories at the moment Corypheus decided to attack directly was Flemeth's – Mythal's doing. The timing was just too perfect.

For she stands for retribution and Corypheus' crimes demand it to be given to him full forced.

Evie's voice resonated through out Skyhold's forces.

"Everyone! Any moment, Corypheus will pass over that bridge! Remember, we beat him and close the Breach, this whole nightmare ends! Fight and give him everything you got. Losing is no option!"

Cheers and cries rang back at her and for added fun Evie announced that drinks will be on Josephine.

The atmosphere changed in an instant. Soldiers grew solemn and cautious. Corypheus was more than half way across the bridge with his dragon circling high above, awaiting its master's call.

"Archers fire at will!" Lelianna called as Corypheus etched closer. Suddenly rifts started to form as he called on the powers of the orb he carried. Demons started pouring through and Fenris, Merrill, and Orynth sprang into action along with the others.

"Nyx! Heads Up!" Varric shouted launching a bolt whizzing passed her head, sinking into that of a shade.

Orynth nodded her thanks to him, but her eyes grew wide as a Terror demon appeared behind Varric.

"Varric!" She shouted as she ran to get nearer.

She channelled her magic into her dagger and threw it at the demon's hand freezing it before it could strike Varric. She skidded to the ground and tripping it in one quick movement she removed the imbedded dagger and aimed on at the head and the other on it's body, pouring more magic into her daggers. The demon froze completely until it shattered.

Varric just stood there slack-jawed. Orynth smiled at him retrieving her daggers.

"Shit. Impressive. I've never actually seen you fight. Scary stuff."

Orynth laughed. "You're welcome Varric!" She called as she ran to rejoin the fight.

"Ah, boss! He's here!" Bull announced as Corypheus landed inside the walls.

"Tell me; where is your maker now? Call him, call down his wrath upon me." He challenged. The fighting soldiers trying to stay focused. "You cannot!" Corypheus bellowed. "For he does not exist! I am Corypheus. It is I who shall deliver you from this life in which you linger. Bow before your new god and be spared!"

A brave soldier had the guts to walk up to him and spit at his feet. "Never."

Corypheus' face turned even more menacing. "As you wish."

Rifts started forming faster and the soldiers and scouts were growing even more frantic.

"There's too many!" Merrill shouted while trying to hold them back from a soldier who had been struck badly.

"We can do this Merrill!" Fenris ground out through gritted teeth as he drove his sword through oncoming terror demons.

"Fenris!" Orynth shouted as a demon tried to swing at him. Fenris quickly pulled his sword out of the other and swung it around in a whirlwind motion at the demons that were starting to circle him.

They caught Evie, Solas, and Bull and a few others storming up to Corypheus.

"Ah, I knew you would come." Corypheus spoke to Evie.

"This ends now Corypheus!"

"And so it shall." He agreed and his magic surged through the hold, ripping apart the stone and ascending the part they were on. Evie's group had been risen up along with Corypheus. Orynth was standing too near and she got caught up on it as well.

She got her bearings and hearing Evie's group talking, she went to them.

"We shall prove once and for all which of us is worthy of god-hood."

"I've no interest in god-hood! My only interest is in defeating you!"

Corypheus' face twisted in rage. A serpent like noise startled the group and they prepared themselves. Crawling up from behind Corypheus was his pet, and like a cat it was getting ready to pounce. With a growl, it leapt on them, only to be interrupted by a purplish looking dragon. The two faced on another off, arsing to the sky to battle. The purple one went higher and then dove down to the building, taking Corypheus' with it. Smashing it to the ground. The dragon had changed back it's form. It was Morrigan. Morrigan who looked very exhausted and injured. Corypheus' dragon was getting up and making its way to Morrigan who was struggling to rise.

Orynth wasted no time. She ran to Morrigan's side.

"Ghilan!" Solas shouted, noticing her form running off,

Corypheus continued his taunts and strikes at the others,

"I have this Solas, go help them!"

Reluctantly he did so. Orynth summoned a huge wall of ice and was able to sneak Morrigan to the side, out of harms way. Morrigan made to stand, but Orynth laid a hand on her shoulder.

"Rest."

The dragon broke through the ice, catching their scent, it spotted them. It was limping but it was still making its way to them fast, wings flapping.

Morrigan made to move.

"Stay down!" Orynth warned as she started off to face the dragon.

She ran at it, determinedly. She dodged it's sweeping claws and slid under and stared attacking its back legs, only to have it leap in the air and land facing her. It opened its mouth and released its sickened fire, infused with red lyrium. She dodged most but when she couldn't out run it she called on a wall of ice and tired holding it off. It wasn't enough. Moving her hands swiftly around she formed a sphere covering herself. Once it backed off she dropped it cautiously only to find that the dragon had disappeared into the sky. It was diving for Morrigan again who struggled to stay up and cast a spell.

Orynth was too far away.

She started running.

The dragon was coming too fast.

She pushed herself harder.

Suddenly a shift started happening. As Orynth pushed herself harder and harder, her magic flared up along with her will. It was another gift of hers. She began sprouting wings, like that of a Griffon's. She remembered that this was a form she'd take on as a child.

She picked up enough speed and she took off flying. Orynth was far faster in the sky.

Before the dragon opened its maw fully, Orynth shot a bolt of burning cold energy at it's head before slamming into it in full force, knocking it off the risen ground and into the air and out of sight. Orynth looked up and saw it was heading to the others. She landed by Morrigan to make sure she was well enough.

"Morrigan, will you be well enough if I leave you here?"

She nodded. "I've never seen magic like that before. The ability to shapeshift as you are … What are you?" Morrigan asked warily.

Orynth didn't reply. Morrigan closed her eyes and listened to the voices from the Well. She gasped, eyes wide. Orynth nodded, confirming what Morrigan had just learnt.

"Why are you here? Are you here to doom us all?"

"No, but I am here to stop the one who is." Orynth spoke and then took off towards the others/

"Are you evil?" Morrigan halted her.

Orynth clenched and unclenched her hands. "No, I don't believe I am. Though, others would see me that way." With that she took off, wasting no more time.

Flying as fast as she could, she headed towards the dragon which was heading towards the others. Orynth raised her daggers, flying right under the dragon's wing and sliced through it, causing the dragon to roar in pain as it plummeted to the ground and landed in front of the Inquisitor below. The dragon rose again, making its way to the Inquisitor and her group still. It's maw opening up again, releasing its breath of lyrium. There was no time for the others to react. Orynth quickly dove to intercept it. As she descended in-between them she called on a massive thick wall of ice. She landed and finished, crouching, wings extended side by side upward.

Her allies surely noticed.

Solas surely noticed.

Orynth rose and looked at them. They were frozen in awe and shock.

However, she had no time for that. Her wall of ice was deteriorating. She turned to it and held her hands against it pressing more magic into it.

She needed help. Orynth yelled to them. _"Ma Halani!_ Don't just stand there!"

The group sprang into action shaking off their shock and remembering the danger. When they weren't behind her anymore she released the shield and dodged the flames and sprang around it, daggers in hand and joined Bull in attacking it up close. Solas attacked at a distance with his magic and Evie with her bows and arrows.

Little by little they wore down it's defenses. Bull having taken the final blow; they were able to go after the magister himself. Corypheus.

They had cornered him in a tower sitting just below the tear in the sky.

All at once they attacked him with everything they had. Solas providing barriers and offensive maneuvers. Bull putting in the heavy hits whenever he was able to get close enough. Evie, launching arrows at him to keep him unfocused. Everyone was putting all they had into defeating him, Orynth went in for the kill. Corypheus staggered and fell to his knees.

"Evie now!" She yelled.

Evie marched up to him. "You want into the Fade so badly?" Anger flared forth as she shot her hand out. "Then here you go!" A rift opened up and had swallowed him. Corypheus was no more.

With Corypheus gone, Evie grasped the orb and held it in the palm of her marked hand and lifted it towards the sky.

Crashes of thunder and bolts of lighting shot out as the sky was being knit together. Finally, the sky had been healed, scarred, but the Breach was no more.

Cheers rang throughout the hold as they returned to a semblance of normalcy.

Left, alone, forgotten on the ground, was the orb. Shattered.

Orynth hadn't recognized she was still in winged form as she approached Solas.

She caught him moving towards the forgotten orb. Her stomach dropped. That meant …

"Solas …"

"The orb … its gone." He said in a hoarse whisper.

"Solas, I'm so sorry. I know you wanted to retrieve it intact." She cringed in remembrance of what that meant for him … them. "Solas, please … there's another way – "

"No." He cut her off. "There isn't.

"Solas, Fen please don't – "

"You remember more about your pas then you let on it seems."

The way he said that. She felt hurt. She nodded.

"Who are you?"

"I am Ghilan, Solas. I am Nyx. But my true name, my name given to me when I was brought into the world was Orynth. My mother was Mora and my Father was Rhoe."

Solas' brows knit together. He knew he had heard of those names before. Then it had hit him. "The Forgotten Ones."

"Yes."

"Then you were – are?"

"Yes."

He looked thoughtful for a moment. Soaking in this new information. He shook his head.

"Regardless, _ma Ghilan, ma lath,_ I want you to know that what I – we feel for each other is real. What we had was real. _Ar lath ma."_

"Solas, please don't – "

"Ghilan!" She turned to see who had shouted her name. It was Fenris. She turned back to face Solas but he was gone.

Almost everyone that fought Corypheus had gathered around her as Fenris approached. She quickly wiped her face from any fallen tears as she also shifted back. Her wings retreating into her back. Almost everyone then had seen her change.

Evie came back with Fenris and was about to question her about the wings when she noticed the person Evie saw her talking to moments ago, had vanished.

"Nyx, where's Solas."

"I don't know."

Orynth face twisted with pain, eyes stinging with more tears that she held back.

"Nyx, what magic was that?" Evie asked pointing to her back, hesitatingly.

"Old magic." Was all Orynth said.

"Yes, but where – "

"Please, not now. I'll answer everything, just not now. Why don't you celebrate first?"

Evie studied Orynth's face for a moment longer and released a sigh and spoke softly, understanding. "Alright."

Orynth closed herself down. She needed to be done for a bit. She walked up to her room and locked the door, ignoring the people who tried to question her.

Fenris' eyes watched her retreating form. A few moments he gave her. Merrill had been knocked out and Fenris carried her over to the healers. Saying, that she was just brutally exhausted and will recover the next day. Mid – morning most likely.

Everyone was cheering, eating, and drinking as the celebration wore on. Orynth had come down for a bit to say her congratulations and thanks. She had explained to people that inquired about her wings, was that it was an older magic that she had remembered her mother teaching her before they became slaves. It was magic that was passed down from generations she had said.

That eased most of everyone's curiosity, but not Fenris. It was not really his business to pry, but he cared about her. So he made it his business. When he saw her bid goodnight to the rest of the room her followed her up the stairs to her room. She never looked back, not once that's how Fenris figured she knew her was following her. She left the door ajar when she entered. Fenris followed her inside, closing the door behind him.

He turned to face her. She was standing facing him, eyes downcast, arms holding herself. She looked so lost, he thought as he studied her. He crossed his arms over his chest and simply said, "You lied."

"Fenris – "She began, pleading.

"Ghilan, we talked about this remember. Trust."

"Yes, Fenris I – "

"Then please," he stepped closer hands on her shoulder, "talk to me."

She brought her mismatched eyes to stare into his forest green orbs. Teeth worrying her lips.

"Please Ghilan. I hate seeing you like this. You hate lying, I can see it in your eyes. Something is bothering you greatly. Something happened to you when you were passed out. I worry about you Ghilan. I care for you. No matter what you say that will not change. Do you hear me Ghilan?"

"Yes." She said a bit numbly but also warmed by his sincerity.

"Please Ghilan. Trust me."

She contemplated and then finally spoke. "Fenris, I promise I will. Just not tonight. Please, I'm – I'm just … really tired."

What she wanted to do was go after Solas but she had no idea where he went. The thoughts made her head stir.

Orynth walked to her bed. Stripped out of her garments until she was just in her underclothes. She got in the bed, wanting to fall asleep. She figured Fenris would leave when he wanted. Instead she felt the bed shift as he laid beside her. Orynth turned her head to look over her shoulder at him to find him on his side, arms crossed, facing her.

"Shouldn't you stay with Merrill?" She casually asked.

"She will be fine. The healers are attending to her and there isn't much I can do for the state she is in. However, you seem like you can use the company." He gave one of his rare, gentle smiles.

Orynth turned her head back facing away from him and closed her eyes.

" _Ma nu venin … Emma serannas._ Thank you." She whispered quietly and then she let herself drift off to sleep.


	26. Chapter 26

**CH 26: I've Told You Now …**

 __ _ **I've Told You Now by Sam Smith**_

"Ghilan! Ghilan, wake up!"

Someone was shouting at her. She couldn't get out though. She was trapped in complete darkness.

She heard a sickening laugh and knew it was to be Andruil's.

" _Ma Ghilan,_ wake up." She heard a faint whisper from beyond the shadow.

"Ghilan!"

" _Ma Ghilan!"_

"Ghilan!"

Over and over they shouted, one after the other, then in unison. She couldn't find her way out. She was panicking, she would be forever trapped in the dark. Their shouts again and again, echoing in the cold, dark chamber and then …

"Orynth …"

A mixture of a voice she trusted and another … wicked and dark. Andruil.

Orynth jolted awake, colliding foreheads with a very concerned Fenris.

"Ghilan! Finally, you're awake." Fenris breathed a sigh of relief.

"Fenris?" She felt a little disoriented.

He took her hand in his and looked into her eyes.

"Ghilan, you were flailing about, breathing frantically. You were having a nightmare."

She held his hand, though lost in her thoughts as her eyes drifted.

"Ghilan?"

She didn't respond, still lost in thought. He laid a hand on her shoulder and in an unsure whisper he addressed her again.

"Orynth?"

Her head snapped up and looked him dead in the eyes, her hands clutching his.

Fenris was surprised that it had worked. He wasn't sure where he had heard this name pop up. It was like a faint whisper in the back of his mind. He had said this just moments before she had woken up and it had caused them to collide.

He stared at her and her at him. He broke the silence first.

"I'll get you some breakfast and you can tell me everything." He emphasised. "Just as you agreed. Then we can go check on Merrill."

He left the room and in a short moment he was back with tea and porridge for the both of them. He waited patiently while she took the time to think of how to tell him. Of where to even start. She finished eating and clutched her tea cup and began to speak.

No more lies, no more half truths. At least not with him. This man, so keen and stubborn, is not easily fooled.

Orynth told him of her parents; Rho and Mora. She told him abut the magics they possessed. They could manipulate the darkness and the night. Her parents had been labelled as 'Forgotten Ones', an insult as the had been kicked out of the noble pantheon after discovering what their magic had been capable of and they labelled them dark and wicked.

Later they had her. Her throat felt constricted as she told him true name, the name her parents had given her, Orynth. As her magic started to manifest it was seen as wicked as well, for her unnatural ability of shapeshifting the way she can and her unnatural talent for cold spells. Unnatural as in she could freeze a whole lake or person, solid until they shattered. The Pantheon was scared of what their powerful family could do. They were all considered evil in their eyes. One of their kind, Anaris, had foolishly and had known very well what the outcome would be, dueled Andruil.

Orynth told Fenris of the bet her had made, offering up people of their kind to serve Andruil if he had lost. Which he did.

They had dueled in front of most of the members of the Pantheon, and when Andruil had chosen her slaves, she had chosen her family. One of the most powerful ones there was. And with Anaris being even more powerful than they and being higher up, along with witnesses of the Pantheon, her family had no choice.

Rules were rules.

Anaris and Andruil had dueled honestly in the eyes of the onlookers. However, her father and mother knew Anaris did it just to obtain their land, and Andruil, they supposed she wanted to humiliate them. One of the most powerful families … were her slaves. They were a prize to the hunter.

But it wasn't enough.

It wasn't enough that her parents were made slaves, Andruil had to mark Orynth's parents right in front of her eyes, stripping them of their memories of who they were in the process. She didn't know how Andruil had done it, but Orynth hated Andruil in that moment and at the same time feared her. Orynth had to watch as her parents sagged to the floor, shells of who they were.

She saw Fenris' knuckles turn white as he clutched the sheets as she went on.

"Andruil then stalked towards me, she asked for my name as she ran her talon like finger down my cheek. And she wiped my memories as well. The next thing I remembered was waking up in a hovel in Andruil's lands. My parents called themselves San and Live and I was Ghilan. Apparently Andruil didn't want us to keep our names as well as our magic."

Orynth retold to him the story of how she escaped Andruil. The true story.

He gave her a hard look at that.

She told him of Neil. She had told him everything up to the point of when they met. She gave him the time he needed. She saw various emotions run through that hardened face of his.

He shifted his eyes to her and nodded. "Thank you … Orynth." He breathed out and gently kissed her forehead as a gesture of acceptance.

Her eyes shot up with surprise and then started to water. "Fenris – "

"Come, Merrill should be awakening soon." Fenris said as he opened the door.

"Will you tell her … anyone?"

He stilled, contemplating. "No. It is yours to tell. I have no right to share that information and no desire to unless you say." Turning to her he smiled softly with warmth. "You can trust me … Ghilan." Using the name everyone else knows her by as if proving a point.

She smiled back and wiped her eyes. "Alright. Let's go."

They agreed that as much as they wanted to tell Merrill and felt bad for not, they wouldn't. They didn't want her freaking out and it really wasn't imperative.

"Merrill!" Orynth hugged her friend, Fenris gave her a short chaste kiss.

"Welcome back, my love." He said as he pulled back.

"The Inquisition seems as though it's no longer in need of our help at the moment. Are we to stay and continue with them or go back to our work?" Orynth asked her companions.

"I think that we can get back to our work now. The threat is over now." Fenris said.

"Yes, and if they need our help again we can let them know we are willing to help. I rather like it here." Merrill spoke merrily. "I'll miss it."

"Yeah." Orynth sighed.

"Then it's settled." Fenris declared.

They stayed until Merrill was given the okay, then they packed up, took care of unfinished business, said their good-byes, and then left the Inquisition.

If they were needed, they would come back.

 **NEXT CHPT IS THE EPILOGUE!**


	27. Chapter 27

**Epilogue:**

Orynth laid on her bed, numb and utterly broken. Despair, grief, rage, hatefulness, and wrath left her system that day. To think it was only just two days ago that she found him since he had disappeared two years ago. Orynth had been experiencing an onslaught of emotions when she laid eyes on him. She felt overjoyed, love, anger, regret, and sadness, all at once. She got up from the bed to poke at the dimly lit fireplace.

Memories of that day still hovered over her.

Orynth had followed the Inquisitor to the place where they saw the female Qunari run off to. Both Evie and Orynth knew that they needed to reach Solas first. Evie had brought along Dorian and Varric, while Fenris and Merrill accompanied Orynth.

"Solas, please!" Orynth implored to her love, "Don't do this!" Tears were streaming down her face, yet she stood her ground with all her strength.

" _Ma Ghilan_ , I will save the Elvehn people. Even if it means at the cost of this word."

Anger rose up in her.

"And what of these people, Fen Harel!" She gestured to their companions who were too stunned to do anything.

Varric and Dorian watched with open mouths and wide eyes. Merrill, ah Merrill. It was two of her nightmares played out before her, The Dread Wolf and one of the Forgotten Ones. Merrill looked as if she wanted to run, but was too petrified to do so. Lastly, Fenris. Fenris stood hands clenched, knuckles white, eyes never leaving the two ancients. Orynth had told him the absolute truth about herself. She trusted him with her entire being.

"You would endanger and kill innocents!" She raised her voice.

"I will undo my mistake!" Solas shot back in equal volume.

"These people," she was begging, desperations coating her words, "are real Solas. This is their time, their world. Leave the past be Fen Harel. I am begging you, please, please."

Evie fell to the ground in pain clutching the wrist of the hand that's held the anchor.

Solas turned his head towards Evie and his face fell. He crouched beside her and took her hand in his.

"Solas, please listen to Gh – Orynth. There must be a better way at least. One that doesn't destroy our world."

"You have been a true friend Evelyn Trevelyan. I am honored to have gotten a chance to call you as such."

"Solas …" Evie spoke softly, her heart dropping with tears pricking her eyes. "Please."

"Solas, undoing the Veil will release them! You know them and what monsters they are! Yet you will set them free?! Even knowing that the woman you love is terrified of Andruil!?"

She knew it was selfish of her to say that … but she was getting desperate. She knew it was shallow, and harsh, and … she hoped it would sting.

" _Ma lath …_ " Solas eyes were heavy with sadness.

"You – you said all those things to me, you made those vows! Yet you are breaking them! Solas, you're breaking my heart."

Orynth was losing control of her emotions. Her breathing became more rapid. In the corner of her eye she could of swore a flash of Fenris' markings.

Orynth dropped to the ground, her breathing was too fast, she was panicking, she needed to control it. On her hands and knees, she tried, but her tears kept coming.

"My love …" Solas knelt in front of her, running a hand soothingly down her back. Her breathing slowed a bit and she stared him in the eyes.

"I can't," her voice got caught in her throat. She shook her head and tried again, "There's nothing I can say … is there? Nothing anyone can say that will change your mind?"

"Orynth," it was the first time since her found out that he called her that, "I am truly sorry, but I must undo this. I made so many mistakes, this being he worst. I must fix it."

Her eyes began watering again. He truly could not see. H was so blinded by his guilt that he truly could not see.

"No, _ma lath_. You are wrong." Her eyes strained with sorrow and pain, she cradled his face in her palm. "Destroying this world will be your worst mistake."

Solas stood, unnerved by her words. "I will never forget you, Ghilan." He said as he started to leave.

"Solas!" She called out to his form. "I will find a way! I will prove you wrong! This world does not have to die! I promise you, I will not let you destroy it or yourself, even if I have to die to see to it! I will not let you make that mistake! I will find a way!"

Solas turned back to his path, head hung low as he whispered, "I hope so Orynth."

She numbly sat down, staring at the fire, head on her knees that she hugged to her chest. It was like the day Neil had told her that her parents had been executed.

She was now an emotionless shell.

She knew it should bother her, but she couldn't find a reason to care at the moment.

Orynth stretched a hand to trace the flames of the fire.

She knew that deep down she did in fact care.

Just like she knew that the fire she basked her hand in was hot.

Yet, she felt nothing.


	28. Authors note

AN: Hey hi! The author here! ^^

I just wanted to publicly answer some questions and feedback.

\- When I started this fan fiction, I had intended for a sequel. At first, I was meaning to wait until DA 4 came out so I can continue writing it. But seeing as DA4 wont be here for a while, I may be inclined to start it earlier than that.

However, I've been preoccupied lately to do any writing of the sort. Any writing I've done after this fic has been one shots. It's just been something easier for me to manage.

To be honest, I may not do a sequel.

Though part of me still wants to keep my word and work on part 2.

So, there is a chance I will make one, however, I cant say for sure when that will be. But if the people want a sequel, I will try my best to make that happen. It might take some time though.

\- I know this may not be the best fic out there, this was the very first one I had written in a very long time.

I do realize some of my work in this fic could be a lot better.

I know I have typos and what not's throughout my work, I do read over and even spell check everything. Unfortunately, there are those few words where it just slips under my radar. ^^;

I am hoping any fics that I do from here on out will be better.

I want to thank you all you have been following this fic, commenting, and support. As always, I do welcome constructive criticism, so thank you to those who have been leaving those kind of comments as well.

I am sorry if I disappointed anyone with whether or not I will do the Part 2.

After I had finished this fic I said to myself, "I took too much on and I wont do a part 2."

However, it's been a few years since I had written this. So, if I can amp myself up to it, I may give my hand at doing Part 2.

My hope is that, if I do a sequel, it will turn out better than part 1.

I do hope to get writing again. So in the meantime I may produce some one shot fics, not necessarily DA ones, but I'm hoping they'll help me get up and going again. With any luck I will have improved my writing and gathered ideas for IWGYTTN part 2.

Thank you all again for all you're support and comments. ^^


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